The Path to Motivation and Discipline (Part I)
Hi there!?It's been a long time since I've written. A couple of days ago, I mentioned to someone that I was writing a series of new articles, and she asked me, "What happened?" I said nothing; why? "It's because you are always writing when you are mad, or something happened." Well, I promise nothing happened this time; however, I was thinking about this topic for a while and thought sharing some ideas would be cool.
Here, you can check out the latest articles:
Today,?I?will start another mini-series of articles.?The articles will debate why our choices impact motivation and our plans lead to discipline. But?to support these arguments,?we'll?address each topic individually.?
Introduction
We all want to feel motivated and disciplined, but where do motivation and discipline come?from? The answer lies in our choices and plans.
The choices we make shape our motivation levels. Every decision is an opportunity to ignite our inner fire or let it fizzle out. When we choose activities, environments, and mindsets that align with our values and aspirations, we cultivate motivation that compels us forward.
On the flip side, choices that disregard our core needs and desires starve our motivation. Settling for unfulfilling routines, toxic relationships, or pursuits lacking purpose acts like trying to start a fire with damp logs.
Research shows that motivation thrives when we have autonomy, feel competent, and connect with others (Gagné, 2014 ). Motivation peaks when we choose self-concordant goals that reflect intrinsic values and interests. We feel energized when tackling challenges that align?with what matters most.
Our plans lead to discipline. Motivation alone is not enough—it is the discipline that helps us act on that motivation day after day. Discipline emerges through the specific plans and systems we implement. Creating realistic, structured plans provides the scaffolding that motivation requires to lift us to achievement.?
Plans break down lofty goals into concrete steps. They map out habits, schedules, and micro-strategies that turn motivation into consistent action. A clear plan transforms spontaneous motivation into a disciplined routine.
First: What is the concept of choice??
Well, it depends, but a standard syntax that you may find is "Free Will."
According to?Britannica , choice is the?ability?to freely choose between alternatives.?Choice is a result of the traditional notion of free will, understood as?humans' supposed power or capacity to make decisions or perform actions independently of any prior event in or state of the universe.
Our choices show what we?truly?are, far more than our abilities -- J. K. Rowling.
One of the greatest human fears,?sometimes?in the way of personal evolution, is our difficulty in making decisions and finding the best choice for our life, work, and education. Sometimes, not choosing is a choice. You chose not to choose.
I came to the conclusion that?we have three types of choices during our lives that determine the beginning, stability, and end of our lives.
1. The choices that parents make for us.?
When we are born,?we are not able to choose for ourselves. We cannot make decisions or choose certain aspects that can determine the near future. Therefore, these choices are made by those who take care of us:?our parents, grandparents, etc.
2. The choices you make for?yourself.
After we've grown up and?reached the age of making decisions by ourselves, we make choices that impact our present and future lives.
3. The choices your children make for you.
At the end of our life, there will be moments when amnesia will kick in :D?and?we?won't?be able to make?certain?choices; therefore, our kids will choose for us.?
You and I are probably now at the second stage of life, which means?we are the ones who are choosing things.?We are in charge of our decisions.
Life is a matter of choices; every choice you make makes you.?— John C. Maxwell.
One of the phrases?we often hear is, "You are the result of your choices." Life is a series of choices, but sometimes, we have moments when we don't?know what to choose.
Now, this may be related to a problem that?is?a generational issue.?Our parents (with the best intentions) created a fear in us. Why? Because we always heard: "Be careful! You could make a wrong choice!".
This fear is real, and whenever we have choices to make, our hearts feel heavy because it feels like there is a wrong way or a right way.
Eighty percent of all choices?are based?on fear. Most people?don't?choose what they want; they choose what they think is safe.?-- Dr. Phil McGraw
In a?study ?conducted by neuroscientist Antonio Damasio, he looked at people whose brains couldn't process emotions well while they appeared typical in many regards. They could say what they should do, but they struggled to decide, even on simple things like what to eat. Many decisions have good and bad sides. Without feelings to help, these people couldn't make up their minds. So, when we decide things, emotions are really important. Even when we think we're making logical choices, our feelings still play a big part.
Sure, life is a journey of choices, and every decision we make?directly impacts our future; this is why it is important to be mindful of our choices, as they can either lead to positive outcomes or negative consequences.
I?remember the choices I made last year.?I?won't get into much detail, but our decisions may?have huge?negative consequences on our budgets, mental state,?etc. Am?I?happy with all?my?decisions??Definitely?not, and regret is a natural part of life.?However, it is essential?to learn from our mistakes rather than dwelling on them. I?learned the importance of resilience and adaptability in the face of uncertainty.
This approach can help develop a growth mindset and become more resilient.
Therefore, one?important thing to consider while making a decision is being conscious of the course or outcome.?Try projecting it in the future. Hey, I'm not saying to overthink it!
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Take responsibility for your choices and consider the potential outcomes before?making a decision.?This approach will help you make more informed decisions?that align with?your?values and goals.
You may think, yeah, well, you don't know me, and I panic whenever I have to make a decision. I am afraid of the consequences. I agree with you. Choices are not always easy, and they?can be difficult and often?require us to weigh the pros and cons of?each option.?However, I would like you to be proactive and prepared to adapt to changing circumstances rather than being reactive and caught off guard.
Sometimes, the complexity of decision-making may be beyond our ability to manage emotions,?but this?is why?we also need to develop critical thinking skills to?navigate these challenges.
*side note: One of the biggest mistakes we can make when a bad choice is made is to throw good after bad if we've already invested heavily. When we are heavily invested, we're more likely to keep going in the bad direction instead of stopping and reanalyzing the situation.
Another important?aspect of choice is that making the right choice requires self-awareness. You know, most of the time, we make the best choice based on experience. Our subconscious works hand in hand with our brain and personality to achieve?the best outcome (that's how it is supposed to work).
We must understand our?own?strengths, weaknesses, and motivations to make informed decisions.?This?is important because our choices have a long-term impact.?
Let us consider the theory class is over and transpose everything into real life.?The example?I would spend time on?is?Choosing A Career. Based on everything above, let's simplify things into simple steps:
Step 1 – Know?your?personality.
During university, we were asked to write a life plan. The plan had to include a perspective on our future and what we would do during our lives. It dawned on me recently that most of my writing happened. I analyzed my personality, strengths, and weaknesses and projected what I wanted to do.?Entrepreneurship was?my?goal.
I?started the entrepreneurial road pretty rough, with many failures, pauses, and moments when the pressure to quit was intense. However, when I began the work, I knew one thing:?my?personality helped?me. It is natural for?me?to sell, promote, invest, and sometimes lose.?Your personality mustn't?get in the way of?your?goals.
Step 2 – Ask?yourself?questions
What skills do I have?
You may be a dexterous person. You may pay more attention to details and see things that most do not. I often ask myself what I'd like to do and what I'm good?at.
*Be careful:?There are things?you?like to do and things?you?are good?at.?Pay attention to this difference between Like to do and Good?at?because?you?may like to do something, but?you're?not good at it.?You may?do what?you?like, but you may never perform. So, not all skills are a generator of performance.
Example:?I?have been playing the piano for over 20 years.?I?love listening to music, composing short melodies, and finding new chords that?I?can use, but will I be the next Mozart? NO!?That's?because?I?understand what?I?like to do as a HOBBY and what?I?am good?at.
Are you focused on Development or Prevention?
Those focused on development are optimistic, take risks, think abstractly, and are creative. On the other hand, those focused on prevention are good planners, aware and realistic, think analytically, and do not take?big?risks.
Example:?Do?you?like being an accountant or a good marketer? Do you like sales, or are you a good team manager?
What environment do you want to work in?
Before the pandemic, it was rare for you to hear this: Today, I'm working from home.?This?is because we were used to going to the office and being efficient. There are multiple ways to work and be efficient: alone, in a team, in a cubical office, at home, or in the field.
Maybe you enjoy silence and peace of mind and want to be alone.?Clearly,?entrepreneurship is not for you. Neither sales nor marketing.?In fact,?none of what socialization entails.
Do?you?like to be surrounded by people? You may be a good HR or marketer.
Step 3 – Make lists.
One of the tedious aspects of analyzing?your?choices is putting them on paper.?However, this is the most helpful thing to do, as it helps clear up the mess in your mind and ensures that?everything gets adjusted properly.
Fun Fact :?Have?you?heard about the one-minute rule? The one-minute rule states that if?you?have spent one minute in indecision or conflict while thinking about something,?then?it is time to start writing down?your?thoughts to streamline?your?thinking process.
The?first step is to write down the specific question?you?are trying to answer, which often gives you enough clarity and commitment to get?your?thoughts flowing again.?If writing down the question?is not enough,?you?risk becoming distracted, so putting pen to paper is a simple way to regain focus and?progress on the issue.
Step 4 – Get in touch with specialists
When you have to choose your career, for example, and you have multiple options on your plate, one of the things that usually helps you do the triage is asking the specialists from those fields.
It is important to?get in touch with?people who can guide and advise before deciding.
Step 5 – Identify?your?long-term and short-term goals
Honest moment here: the most annoying question I can hear from an HR:?where?do?you?see?yourself?in 5 years? But in 10 years?
For many years, I didn't understand the meaning of it, even though I worked in recruiting for a little and I'm passionate about psychology and understanding this. Some things are just in front of our eyes, though we can't see or understand them. We are not asking people this question because we want to see where they go on vacation. This question highlights goals and future perspectives on your development; it helps us determine your career path.
Could you write down all the goals you want to achieve or think you will be able to achieve in 3 to 5 years?
The second list must contain Short-term Goals, where you will write the goals you want to achieve in the next?6 months to 3 years. These goals will determine your choices, and good?choices lead to successful plans.
Conclusion:
Making choices is an integral part of life, and it's essential to approach decision-making with a mindful and informed perspective. Understanding our personalities, strengths, weaknesses, and aspirations allows us to make choices that align with our values and goals. Remember, every choice we make has the power to shape our lives, so it's crucial to be proactive and consider the potential outcomes before deciding.
Ultimately, the ability to make thoughtful choices is a skill that can be honed over time. Take the time to reflect on your past decisions, learn from your experiences, and continuously strive to make choices that bring you closer to the life you envision. We'd love to hear your thoughts and experiences on this topic. Share your insights, strategies, or any challenges you've faced in making impactful choices in the comments below.
I'll see you next time when we'll talk about the next topic: Motivation.