The Path to Find My Self-Worth

For as long as I can remember, I’ve struggled with self-worth.

Ever since I left home at eighteen, it felt like life kicked me in the teeth over and over again.

And as if that wasn’t enough, I would beat myself up for not living up to my own expectations.

There were moments—short stints where everything clicked, and I felt like I was finally winning. But after a couple of months, it would all fall apart.

I’d feel hollow again. I’d feel worthless again. I’d consider just giving up.

The problem wasn’t my career success or my relationships.

It was how I felt about myself deep inside.

The Pattern of Never Feeling Good Enough

From a young age, my mom pushed me to do my best.

But my young mind didn’t understand that doing my best was enough—I thought I had to be the best. That I had to prove myself to be worthy of love.

And so, I built a life around proving myself.

Around achieving.

Around chasing the next goal.

But the love I gave myself was always fleeting.

It lasted mere seconds before I moved on to the next thing, continuing to beat myself senseless.

The Moment Everything Changed

That all changed in 2023 when I realized I was a transgender woman.

This realization shattered my world and every belief I had about myself.

I had always thought of myself as a man. I never had a reason to think otherwise.

But then one night, the truth hit me like a freight train—the biggest intuitive hit I’ve ever had. And I couldn’t ignore it.

I gave up trying to fight it almost immediately.

Because why not? Nothing else had ever truly worked for me.

So if this felt right, why not just take one step at a time and see where it led me?

Little by little, I shaved my beard, dressed differently, made hormonal changes.

And I found myself happier.

Not in a superficial way, as if I was fitting some mold of what a woman should be, but in an inner peace that began to blossom from finally loving myself.

Unshakable Confidence in My Personal Life—But Not at Work

Every small choice I made was a demonstration of self-love. Whether I realized it or not, I was showing myself that I mattered.

In my personal life, I felt confident.

I was open. I shared my truth, even when people didn’t understand.

But at work? My self-worth was still on shaky ground.

For what felt like the hundredth time, I questioned whether I should even be in finance.

I felt disconnected from it. It wasn’t what I truly wanted to be doing.

I knew there was something more for me if I could just take the leap.

But I couldn’t pull the trigger. And when I thought about finding another job, the idea felt daunting.

What else would I even do?

My boss was great. My team was great. My clients were great. My job covered nearly all of my medical expenses.

Could I really disrupt all of this just because I didn’t love what I was doing?

And so the rumination continued—until it was “too late”.

The job market continued to be more and more difficult and the horror stories I heard made finding a new job that I loved feel even harder than finding my true self.

A Shift Toward Something More

By the end of 2024, I finally started to find some peace with my job.

I still wasn’t in love with it, but I saw how I could be more me with my clients. I started having deeper, more meaningful conversations.

People told me I was brave. They encouraged me to keep telling my story.

And for a while, that felt like enough.

I thought, I can stay here a few more years. I can hold onto this while I continue getting the medical support I need.

But then, something shifted.

Raising My Standards for Life

At the end of 2024, I started creating a higher standard for my life.

I moved to a new apartment in an area I love.

I connected with an incredible community of practitioners and professionals and co-authored my first book.

I invested in paid communities I had wanted to join for months.

I hired a close friend as my coach to guide me through this transition (pun absolutely intended).

Step by step, I kept saying yes to myself.

I kept making choices—sometimes big, sometimes small—that showed me I mattered.

The Wake-Up Call I Didn’t Expect

Then, last month, I had a coaching session with my friend Nick.

He told me something that didn’t hit me profoundly in the moment, but over the past few weeks, it has reshaped everything.

He told me how wise I am. How ahead I am at almost thirty.

He shattered the belief that I was behind—that because I hadn’t taken bigger leaps or made more money, I wasn’t successful.

He helped me see how much I’ve grown.

I’ve been intentionally working on myself for seventeen years—something most people don’t start doing until much later in life.

And in the past two years, I’ve taken a quantum leap in self-discovery, self-acceptance, and trust.

He made me see something that should have been obvious: I have nothing to prove.

Just being myself is enough.

Just telling my story is enough.

And even if there was something to prove, I’ve already proven it a thousand times over.

The Final Piece That Needed to Change

So I asked myself: What else do I need to let go of? What else do I need to change? What else do I need to say yes to?

And my job in finance stared back at me like a cat giving me a death glare from across the room.

Almost everything in my life has changed in the past two years.

But this—this one thing—had stayed the same.

Because I didn’t feel worthy of changing it.

But now? That changes.

Closing This Chapter—And Opening a New One

Next month, the same week I turn thirty, I am leaving my job in finance to pursue the impactful work I truly want to be doing in the world.

If you asked me how I got here, I’d tell you there was nothing magical about it.

But honestly? It is magical.

Just not in the way I used to chase magical moments.

I didn’t wake up one day and make a reckless leap into the unknown (even though that’s what it looks like to many others).

I’ve been taking courageous steps all along.

I’ve been learning to love myself and trust myself for seventeen years.

Taking This Wisdom Into the Next Decade

As I step into this new chapter, I’m carrying two core truths with me:

1?? Trust my intuition. It will never be wrong. Only overthinking after the fact will lead me astray.

2?? Trust the universe. There is nothing to fear. Nothing to force. Nothing to plan.

All I have to do is keep showing up—as more and more of my authentic self.

And the universe will match that energy…

If this resonates with you, you’re not alone.

There are more of us than you think. And soon, I’ll be creating spaces for us to find each other.

Stay tuned fellow Conscious High-Achievers.

Massive changes are coming-and I can’t wait to share them with you.

With love,

Sabrina

Thank you again for investing in your own authenticity. I am so grateful to be on this journey with you.