Patent Trolls Can be Amusing

People think that "monetizing IP" is a highly cerebral job for very smart people only. While it should be, I beg to differ as to real life and share some war stories over the past 20 years about dealing with patent trolls, across maybe some 2000-3000 cases - both negotiations and lit. Ranging from obscure cases in rural Kenya to many of the largest ones ever. Patent trolls being players having bought the patents they are asserting, normally for peanuts, from some industrial company, though sometimes they double up as the "crazy inventor of a mere abstract idea" type. As I am a pro-IP person and have done far more offensive than defensive licensing, I write this because the anti-troll crowd has a point. They really do, sadly.

The stories are old, from my time in-house, all are true and all are anonymized:

TROLL 1: "I CAN KILL MY OWN PATENT FOR MONEY"

Sues with one junk patent, which he also prosecuted back in the day as the patent counsel. When that does not lead to a fast settlement, then sends a letter to our CEO about him being willing to sell "dirt on the patent to kill it". The only reason we noticed it was him was because he had such a large ego that he puts his picture in letters. Go figure. He ended up paying for the mess he created and investigated by the local bar.

TROLL 2: "YOUR CEO WILL GO TO JAIL FOR MY PATENTS"

This troll is really a fringe one. And quite well-known too. What they are known for is "enticing" cops to confiscate products at industry show events. But it is less known that they once filed a criminal case against the CEO of my employer seeking criminal penalties (fines and/or imprisonment) for him due to allegedly intentionally and personally infringing their bogus patents as an "industrial property crime". Well, they lost on that one and never got a license done.

TROLL 3: "I SUE ALTHOUGH I AM NOT LEGALLY ALLOWED TO DO SO"

Makes demands for tens of millions of MUSD for a smallish portfolio of patents. Acts super aggressive threatening to sue. Has weird sounding connections to his local governmental R&D institute, where the patents are from and where he also used to work. Then sues someone else instead. And then it is found out in that litigation that he never even had the standing to sue with the patents of his former employer. This is quite common, particularly in the US. Lack of standing to sue that is.

TROLL 4: "RETALIATING WITH PATENTS ALREADY TWICE LICENSED"

Files a US ITC complaint with weak patents. While it is interesting in and of itself that we already had not one, but two, licenses for these patents, it was even more interesting that this troll was a "retaliation vehicle" founded by a large US company that is supposedly "anti-patent". The case gets dismissed in time due to the licenses. The guy, whose idea this was, later embarks on a patent trolling career. It is quite common to have at least one license for the patents trolls sue on, while having several licenses is arguably less common.

TROLL 5: "TROLLING OUR OWN CONTINGENCY LAW FIRM"

Acts all grandiose, with demands in the BUSD range. Though the same portfolio had already been licensed to almost the entire industry for a small fraction of that and was by then also mostly expired. Ends up settling for peanuts, once his contingency lawyers find about the old deals. Really just chump change. In my experience, most trolls troll their contingency firms - if not intentionally, then at least through sheer incompetence. Then again, the contingency law firms often also drop the gloves on losing cases and the troll has no real recourse against the law firm, as it is next to impossible to show that they are not doing their very best.

TROLL 6: "FIFTH US ITC CASE IS THE CHARM?"

Likes to file US ITC cases and makes huge demands. Known for "inventing patents" rather than patentable inventions. Have already been successfully through 4 of those US ITC wars over the years starting in the early 2000s, which means that they must have invested MUSD 50 or so in just litigation against one particular "customer". Still keep on going around with grossly inflated demands. Good luck with that.

TROLL 7: "I AM THE SPIRITUAL SUCCESSOR TO NICOLA TESLA"

Alleges to be the "spiritual successor" to Nicola Tesla. Tries to read a super limited patent from the lighting industry to something entirely different that is in all phones. His read also involves something that has been in phones for decades. Disappears after much chest pounding, kind of like Nicola Tesla. The misunderstood crazy inventor type is common.

TROLL 8: "TELLING FAIRYTALES FOR A BANKRUPT COMPANY"

Has a patent for a very outdated system involving real estate industry. Tries to read that on complex and entirely unrelated technology in modern IT devices. Also intricacies around bankruptcy and massive shareholder disputes. Shareholders have been promised massive fortunes. Suspect that the people running the bankruptcy estate just needed a fairytale IP story to keep on making money of off the bankruptcy estate. Alleges to be owed hundreds of millions, makes nothing in the end. But the people running the bankruptcy estate got paid for years. Seen something similar with many bankruptcy estates.

TROLL 9: "TROLLING DYING PEOPLE TO HAND OVER THEIR PATENTS"

Crazy case involving the inventor on his deathbed in hospital being forced to sign a will to assign the patent. Also the angle that the new owners of the patent harassing the poor guy on his deathbed had actually been outside patent counsel for the employer of the dying person for this very invention. Have seen many cases where patent counsel "goes solo" with client's inventions, but this was extreme. These guys actually make decent money. Bizarro world.

TROLL 10: "YOU MUST STOP SELLING PRODUCTS YOU STOPPED LONG AGO"

This happens a lot. A troll files for a lawsuit seeking to enjoin the sale of products, the sale of which already stopped more than three years ago and only a single digit number was ever sold in the jurisdiction, where the case was filed. Troll refuses to believe this and the case goes to trial. Nothing comes out of it, as there was not even notice of infringement for the sale of those few products long ago. I am constantly amazed about the lack of research before trolls sue. It is also very common to get sued for somebody else's products. Sometimes through a misunderstanding and sometimes as it seems hard to properly use the "edit and replace with" function in MS Word leaving product names from older lawsuits in the complaint. As an example, have been sued for Huawei products, though I never have and certainly never will work for Huawei. That was probably simply a case, where the contingency law firm's assistant just forgot the also change the names of the accused products and not only that of the defendant.