To Party or Not To Party - This is the question.

A couple of days ago, I saw a poll posted on LinkedIn that asked people to share if they were ever fired and tell the story behind it.?

This sparked an idea in my head to share some of my experiences in my 25+ years of work.

Of course there were ups and there were downs and as I go through memory lane in this series of stories that I’m planning in my head, I promise to be transparent and to share the good, the bad and the ugly with the intention of reflecting on it and hopefully to help others realize that it’s okay to share our wins, our losses, our successes, our stumbles and most importantly our learnings and evolution through this insane thing that we call work-life.

Today I will start at the very beginning of my career, when I worked to pay my university bills. Back then I was 20 years old and I worked for a major exhibition management company.

That place was one of the most toxic spaces I have ever worked for.

I was the youngest, the least experienced and the only brown girl in the fold.

Being a typical nerd, I did not drink, I did not smoke, I did not party and I had more than enough things to do with my university work as I loved to be on top of every subject I study.

Let’s just say, I took my learning journey very seriously and I already had a clear trajectory for where I want to be 20 years down the line.

Anyhow, in this organization that I mentioned above, I worked really hard and earned the respect of my colleagues and our clients. I was result-oriented, disciplined and always open to learn.

After a year of hard work in this place, and after witnessing many of my female colleagues, who did not achieve nearly similar results, being promoted; I decided to pull a “Grace” and go and have a frank conversation with the Managing Director.

I booked an appointment through his assistant who gave me 15 minutes, so I prepared a presentation of my track record and what I can bring to the table if given more responsibilities.

On the day, I walked in and started putting my points across as he was staring at me with a smirk on his face.

When I finished, he looked at me and said: “Grace, do you know why everyone is getting promoted and you’re not?”. I replied: “That’s why I’m here, I would love to know where the learning curve is so I can overcome it!”. He stared into my eyes and said coldly: “Grace, you’re not a team player; you never attend any of the weekend parties that I hold at my place, and you don’t even go out for a drink with us.”

I have to say, I was dumbfounded and in all honesty I had nothing to say.

Eventually, I replied: “Noted.” and I packed my stuff and thanked him for his time and left his office.

That night I did not sleep.

Those parties that he talked about were not for me. A lot of activities that, I don’t necessarily agree with, happened during such gatherings. Add to that, is the fact that I did not have time as I was worked and studied at the same time.

For a minute I contemplated whether I should play ball but I shook that off quickly and took the decision to leave the company. I had more that enough experience, character and skill to be able to find something else that would align with my values, and respect me rather than tokenize me the way he did.

The next day, I gave my notice and immediately started looking for something else, to which I found an amazing job with a huge petroleum company that sustained me through the last 2 years of my studies and transitioned me into my career after I graduated.

Moral of the story…

Don’t allow anyone to disrespect you and don’t ever do anything that you might ethically question in the future.

More to come as I reflect more on my career.