Part 2. How to Define Your Life’s Vision and Purpose?
Sergei Maslennikov
Senior Consultant | Energy Transition | Strategy & Finance | Indefi
At some point, most of us end up questioning what we’re doing with our lives. If you haven’t hit that phase yet, brace yourself—it’s coming. I found myself deep in this question in my early twenties, lost in a sea of uncertainty, wondering where to even begin. The process isn’t straightforward, and there’s no clean-cut guidebook for figuring it all out. No, I’m not going to give you a tidy to-do list on "how to define your life’s vision"—I’m not that cruel. I’ll just share what worked for me.
Asking for Help When You're Completely Lost
When I first hit that wall, I did what anyone does when they don’t know what to do: I asked everyone around me. Parents, friends, Google—it didn’t matter. I was on a quest for direction, and anyone even remotely wiser than me became a source of advice. But after a while, I had to face the fact that my old life plans just weren’t going to work out. I had envisioned running a business split between Russia and Canada, getting married to someone I loved at the time, and living in my hometown. But life had other plans.
It took time to accept that my original blueprint for life was no longer realistic. Once I let go of those old expectations, I was ready to start exploring new ways of thinking. That part alone took longer than I’d care to admit.
Philosophy, Psychology, and a Lot of Googling
Once I’d let go of my past plans, I turned to research. I wanted to figure out what was missing—why I felt so lost and unsure of what direction to take. It led me down the rabbit hole of human development theories and psychological frameworks that explain how we grow in terms of maturity and awareness.
One concept that really stuck with me was Lawrence Kohlberg’s theory of moral development, particularly his idea of "postconventional morality." This is the stage where you stop being driven by external rules and expectations, and start making decisions based on your own principles aka being an “adult”. It’s a rare level of thinking—only 10-15% of people get there—but it made sense to me. Most of my decisions up until that point had been about fitting in, meeting expectations, and doing what seemed "right" by society’s standards. But postconventional morality is about doing what’s right by your own sense of ethics, even when it doesn’t align with what’s expected of you.
That hit home. Who doesn't like a little external validation? Unfortunately, that external validation is the crutch that keeps us from growing. Once you start thinking beyond what’s expected and focus on what’s right, things get more interesting (and more complicated). I realized I had been making choices to avoid conflict or criticism, rather than thinking through what I really believed to be right. That realization became a kind of guiding light, helping me reshape how I approached decision-making.
The Questions That Helped Me Get Unstuck
Once I accepted that I needed to grow beyond the thinking that had kept me stuck, I began asking myself deeper questions. They weren’t easy, but they were crucial for uncovering my values and defining what I actually wanted out of life. Here are some of the ones I kept coming back to:
These questions forced me to go deeper than the surface-level stuff—like what kind of career I should pursue—and instead focus on what made me feel fulfilled, even if I wasn’t sure how to get there yet.
The Books That Did (Most of) the Heavy Lifting
I didn’t go through this process entirely on my own. Several books became key in shaping my thinking. Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations helped me understand the importance of resilience and self-discipline, especially when things felt chaotic. Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning taught me that finding purpose doesn’t come from ideal conditions—it’s something you create, even in the worst circumstances. And Mark Manson’s Everything is F**ed* was like talking to a brutally honest friend who tells you the truth you didn’t want to hear: life is messy, and it’s on you to navigate it.
These books helped me realize that honesty—both with myself and others—was a value I needed to embrace. Being honest forces you to confront uncomfortable truths, but it’s only by facing them that you can grow. This became a foundational part of how I started defining my life’s purpose.
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Defining My Purpose
Once I was clearer on my values, the process of defining my purpose became a little easier. For me, it boiled down to something like this: solve difficult, practical problems in a way that generates value—whether it’s intellectual, material, or emotional—and use that value to help others find their own sense of purpose and direction.
This means I focus on intellectually challenging work that makes a tangible difference. Whether it’s through business or personal pursuits, I aim to contribute something meaningful, something that enables others to grow as well. Defining this purpose has given me a sense of direction that feels aligned with my values, even if the path itself is still evolving.
Embracing Conflict as a Path to Growth
One of the tougher lessons I’ve learned is that avoiding conflict doesn’t make it go away. In fact, it usually makes things worse. Real growth—whether it’s personal or in relationships—often comes from addressing uncomfortable truths head-on. It’s not easy, and it requires emotional resilience, but it’s essential if you want to move forward.
True maturity, I’ve realized, involves being willing to have difficult conversations and face challenges directly. Avoiding these things only leads to more problems down the road. Confronting them, on the other hand, leads to stronger relationships and a deeper sense of self-awareness.
Building Resilience and Staying Calm
Another major takeaway for me has been learning how to stay calm under pressure. Panic clouds your judgment and leads to impulsive decisions. By cultivating a sense of inner calm, I’ve been able to face challenges more effectively. That’s where you find your strength. Thank you, stoic philosophy. Old good Marcus Aurelius was right: you can’t control the chaos of the world, but you can control how you react to it.
Freedom, I’ve learned, isn’t about having endless choices or avoiding hardship. It’s about choosing how you respond to difficulty, and sometimes, the real path to freedom is through suffer and sacrifice. I know, it sounds bleak, but even Nietzsche and Dostoevsky will back me up on this one. When you face hardship and still choose to move forward, you gain a kind of freedom that’s not about escaping problems but rising above them.
The Law of Reciprocity
Lastly, one truth became glaringly obvious: whatever energy you throw out into the world comes back to you. Call it karma, call it the law of reciprocity, call it what you will—but it’s real. If you give, help, and genuinely try to make life better for others, the universe (or maybe just other people) tends to return the favor. Same goes for negativity. Spread bad vibes, and you’ll get them back in spades.
Putting Vision into Action
So, after all this soul-searching and philosophizing, I finally came up with some priorities: Keep learning, solve the hard problems, and give back. That’s the plan. It’s not a five-step process to happiness, but it’s working for me.
And here’s the kicker: defining your life’s vision isn’t some grand epiphany. It’s more like a marathon you never knew you signed up for. But you’ll get there—just keep asking the right questions, face the conflicts, and don’t panic. Oh, and be kind. It’ll come back to you. Trust me.