PART 1: WHY ARE ALL THE BLACK PEOPLE ANGRY?

Hypotheses Of An Everyday White Guy

DIFFERENCE FEELS… DIFFERENT

As I sat at home on the 4th of July, with Nathan’s Hotdog Eating Contest being the only sport on television, I found myself in a pensive, reflective place … probably had something to do with the mix of “stay-at-home”, re-acclimating to the US after living in Mexico, and missing some semblance of solidity for the future (yeah, I guess that’d probably do it).

• “Are other people celebrating?”
• “If they are, what are they celebrating?”
• “Have I ever really thought about Independence Day? Or what independence means to me?”

Before I jump off the deep end here, let me first start by saying that I, for one, love me some Independence Day — the food, the celebrations, the movie (not the second one, don’t be ridiculous). However, I think it’s safe to say, regardless of what our relationship might’ve been with “independence” at the beginning of the year, we each have a… well… different relationship with it today.

So, in the vein of “different” (and probably a little FOMO), I decided to do something I rarely let myself do — peruse the news. (that won’t be the last time we rhyme… and I wish I were sorry)

Positivity Doesn’t Pay The Bills

As I scanned through headline after headline and article after article, with my feed set to pull from all sources (so I can really feel full-on overwhelmed), one thing was crystal clear — we certainly don’t seem very happy. At all. And it doesn’t matter who’s speaking, or what they’re speaking on… “Murder” this. “Blame” that. “World Explodes” everywhere. Not a single story represented anything close to positivity. The only story not framed as an “F you” was about the largest black hole found to date (but even that’s terrifying in its own way).

• Covid-19.
• Black Lives Matter.
• Global Economic Retraction.
• The Precipitous Decline of the United States.

I guess that’s not terribly surprising given everything that’s going on in the world… and how addicted we are to fear-based media. “If it gets clicks, it sticks”, as they say (for the record, I’ve never heard anyone say that but it rhymed, so… here we are again). But still. Not a single story? EVERYTHING is negative?? We don’t think it’d be worth our energy to have even the smallest dose of “maybe it’s not so bad” invited into our lives??? (at least it was consistent I guess)

#FvckTheFourth

Now that I started down this path, I figured I’d really let myself go full-on Alice and dive down the rabbit hole — “Let’s see what’s goin’ on with Twitter.” I’m not sure what exactly I was look’n for, but then again, who does really know what they’re looking for when they hop on Twitter?

Welp. Right out of the gate, we picked up where we left off. “FvckTheFourth” was the top trend, and it was certainly “thorough” in its message. I scrolled and scrolled, trying to take it all in (regardless of my perspective), but I was just struck by how intense the energy was… and by the sheer density of how little space was held for anything remotely resembling kindness (guess I thought Twitter might have a crack of light, given it’s less filtered than the news… nope. wrong.)

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I stopped reading and sat for a while, digesting. It wasn’t exclusive to any person, perspective, or position; this was from all sides. I felt a lot of different things, but in the end I was simply saddened. Not beaten. Not broken. But, definitely saddened.

How did we get here? Why do we have such a disdain for “different?” How do we bring ourselves out of this… as individuals? As a nation? As humanity?

As I reflected (and decided it was well past time for that first beer), I started to think about what the word “Independence” means. What the holiday is supposed to represent. How the truth of what it represents can be different for different people. There was a lot of back and forth (and more than one beer), but one thing felt consistent: everyone felt like they were the victim.

The Great Escape

So much has felt like it’s been applied to us. This relentless pressure against our previously established routines. A continuous, forced change. In a lot of ways, it’s only human to resist things that threaten our realities. The problem? Resistance tends to generate even more resistance. It creates a cycle that eventually leads to all sides pulling as hard as they can (imagine a Stretch Armstrong… strapped to an endless supply of rockets… all fired at the same time — *poof*).

“Great. So the world sucks. Thanks for the update.”

Ok, maybe… BUT (and I’m gonna need a little leeway here, your honor), what if everything that’s happening was less of an invasion than it seems? That’s not to say it’s any less frustrating, scary, challenging, or any other word you can come up with to describe “uncomfortable”… but, what if it wasn’t really something to be resisted? What if it was actually an invitation?

(Now, I get it — no one wants to be invited to a party where the theme is “life implosion.” Fair. But sometimes the only way we can get to the other side of the mountain is to turn around and find another path.)

What if we saw this as an invitation to investigate what independence means…? To Investigate our relationship with Independence….? To Investigate how we may or may not take it for granted…? Maybe, this is an opportunity to reimagine Independence altogether (and we might as well give it a go — we’re here, aren’t we).

WHAT IS INDEPENDENCE?

If you ask 100 people what independence means to them, you’re likely to get 100 different answers. So, before we can talk about a collective definition, it probably helps to first look at independence on an individual level.

Our Relationship With Independence

Let’s think about Independence as if it were a specific type of food (any food will do). How you would describe “that food” to a friend might look totally different than how another person might describe it. For some people, “that food” might be their favorite… for others, it might be an unpleasant taste or texture. Some people might have “that food” every day… others, might only get the chance to have it every now and then. Some people might raid the grocery store as if Armageddon is coming and hoard up on “that food” like there isn’t enough to go around… others, might not even know it exists (you can probably see where we’re goin’ with this).

The reality is, outside the context of a national holiday, “independence” isn’t something most people regularly think about… if you believe you have it. But for people that don’t feel that same independence, there’s a lot more to think about… and we all have different thoughts. (back to the lexicon game — 1 pt, SAT word)

Independent (adj)

Instead of making up a definition, I figured it was probably best to start from the top — the dictionary (I had to use the adjective, “independent”, because apparently Merriam-Webster doesn’t adhere to the “don’t use the word in the definition” rule for “Independence”).

The top 4 definitions of “Independent” are:

1. free from outside control; not depending on another’s authority
2. not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence
3. capable of thinking or acting for oneself
4. not connected with another or with each other; separate

The first version jumps out as being the most representative of what we celebrate in the United States on the 4th of July — having freedom from overbearing governance (the British… that whole revolution thing… yeah). Then, that extends into things like freedom of speech, freedom to gather, freedom to do all of the things that we may or may not take for granted as US citizens (that one’s for you, Canada… and the rest of the “Americas”).

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Ok, so we’re pretty solid so far. But, what if we look at the first definition beyond the context of exclusively being from a nation-state perspective? What if we looked at it as being… Free from [rules and regulations]? Free from [media influence]? Not depending on [someone else’s position of power]? All of a sudden, things start to look a little less black and white (pun intended).

And what about the rest of the definitions? How do they factor into Independence and Freedom? Do we normally account for these in our relationship to Independence? Are there pieces we’re not paying attention to that we should be?

Dependence Is a Spectrum

If we look at the second definition of independence, it seems pretty straight forward — being independent is the act of 1) not being dependent on another for 2) livelihood or subsistence.

v2: not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence

Hmmm. Let’s see what happens if we break this bad boy down a little further… (I’m sure you’re surprised)

TODDLERS WITH CAPPUCCINOS

Ok… For the sake of argument, let’s assume it’s possible to be 100% dependent on someone else for all things life — ex: an infant that can’t walk, talk, or chew solid foods (even though they’re still breathing, thinking, and doing all other things “baby” on their own). And… maybe it’s plausible that a person could have such an abundance of resources, perspective, and privilege that they were totally non-reliant on any other person, process, or product — ex: a god-like figure (*squints. shakes head*). Even still… assuming you’re not 1) a toddler in the middle of their morning “read and coffee” routine or 2) Thor from The Avengers, it seems pretty safe to say that you probably fall somewhere in between.

Whether we’d like to think so or not, we’re all (at least in some way) dependent on the happenings of the world, and thus other people. Dependence isn’t a simple, binary “yes” or “no” — it’s on a spectrum. And, taking it a step further, that spectrum has a lot of variables. So instead of imagining “dependence” as a two-dimensional line with arrows on it, it might help to imagine it as a three-dimensional sphere where every person lives in a slightly different area (quick nod to Systems Thinking… and geometry).

A DUCK IS A DUCK IS A DUCK… UNLESS IT'S A GOOSE

Regarding livelihood and subsistence, we all have different definitions of what those mean to us as individuals. For some, it’s the freedom to do as they choose with their day. For others, it’s not having fear around how to pay the bills. And, for other… others, it’s just being able to walk down the street without fear of prejudice and persecution.

Without getting in the weeds (any more than we already have), suffice it to say that it’s difficult to come up with a universal definition of “livelihood” or “subsistence.”

Capability Isn’t Ease — ability

We know where this is headed by now, but bear with me — we’ll be through the monologue soon. I promise it’ll all come together in the end… (probably)

v3: capable of thinking or acting for oneself

SWIMMING IN IMPLICATIONS

“Capable” implies an ability to do something (I think we’re all on the same page there). But, it doesn’t speak to 1) an awareness of or 2) a willingness to do something. Ex: A person is physically capable of swimming, but if they’ve never been in the water before they don’t have 1) an awareness around how to swim or 2) the willingness to take the risk… because… they might die (doesn’t seem great).

JUST DO IT

We can sit here and say that everyone is capable of thinking on their own and acting for themselves, but if they’ve 1) been conditioned not to think and act for themselves, or 2) their circumstances create significant, negative trade-offs for thinking and acting in their own best interest, then all of a sudden Independence isn’t as straightforward.

• A person may be independent and “free” to “act as they please”… but be hesitant to take on the applied judgment for the choices they make (or fearful of retaliation).
• A person may be independent and “free” to “make a living”… but not have had the same opportunities in life (or even know that those opportunities exist).
• A person may be independent and “free” to “Dream the American Dream”… but be restricted by the obstacles of power, money, and access (and thus shackled by the circumstance of class).

It’d be more accurate to reframe this definition of “independent” as: being “capable [but having differing levels of likelihood] to think or act for one’s self [based on their awareness, abilities, and the perceived repercussions].

A Quick Personal Note

Let’s pump the brakes a hot sec (in light of feeling borderline “preachy”) …

The point of all this isn’t to push guilt, or place judgment — that’d just be hypocritical (I’ve had an uncomfortable amount of privilege growing up in the US as a middle-class, white, male). And, despite the borderline clickbait title, it’s not to speak specifically on a black vs white issue — any person or people can (and do) feel marginalized in different ways at different times. It’s also not to say, “don’t celebrate the holiday” — go HAM (dad pun intended)…

The point, hopefully, is to reevaluate our relationship with independence, and to explore how that relationship might be different for different people so we can start having more conversations around what True Independence is… and start enacting change to strengthen it across the board.

“K…. Sooo, are we gonna talk about what Independence actually is?” (how kind of you to ask)

TRUTH IS COMPLEX

True Independence isn’t a simple evaluation of whether or not a person is physically and demonstratively persecuted by their government. That’s certainly an aspect of independence, and sadly one that so many people in our world today still don’t have, but it’s only the start. It’s one piece of the independence puzzle.

• True Independence is the invitation and access to health.

It’s a complex mix of physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual freedoms that are all too often ignored, repressed, or discounted under the guise of “bare-minimum” independence.

• True Independence is the invitation and access to wealth.

It’s the freedom to choose, acquire, and openly participate in the relational, occupational, financial, and social blend of lifestyle that gives a person fulfillment.

• True Independence is the invitation and access to happiness.

It’s giving each person — EVERY PERSON — the freedom and opportunity to choose, and work to acquire, their version of a meaningful life within the boundaries of appreciating the rights of others to do the same.

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True Independence isn’t something you can manufacture, halfway fulfill, or grant with a constitution… It’s the freedom to fully live life. It’s the freedom to know that you have the safety and security to fully live that life. It’s the freedom to embody your most authentic self and to have that self be unconditionally accepted and appreciated by society.

THAT is True Independence. And, counter-intuitively, the only way to strengthen it is by growing in our in[ter]dependence. Quite literally, to be more in-dependence of one another... (consider Part 2 officially “queued-up”)

To Be Continued.

PART 2: BUILDING BETTER

Tales From the Crypt… Of Togetherness

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