A Parent's POV on Esports and Gaming

As the first in my family to attend university, I had always envisioned a different future for my child, one where she could pursue prestigious degrees and a stable career path. Moving across the Atlantic to the UK would provide these opportunities and in my mind, my child would follow a traditional route, perhaps becoming a lawyer or a doctor. But I soon found myself in a position I never anticipated: watching India immerse herself more and more in the world of esports and gaming. Never did I imagine a world where her passion would revolve around screens and controllers. To me, video games were a frivolous pastime, a distraction from the important things in life, my initial thought was that the future I had so carefully laid out was slipping away before my eyes.

Like many parents, at first, I was apprehensive. The hours spent glued to a screen seemed excessive, and I could not shake the nagging worry that gaming was a distraction from more important pursuits. I envisioned my child drifting away from academics, friendships and the social skills that are so crucial for success in life. The thought of her sitting in front of a console while others were out exploring the world or studying for exams filled me with anxiety.

Moreover, the darker side of gaming was also a concern, like many parents, I had heard the stories of online predators lurking in virtual spaces, waiting to target unsuspecting children. I imagined my child being vulnerable, exposed to dangerous individuals who could manipulate and harm her. My fears were compounded by the health risks associated with prolonged gaming. The sedentary lifestyle, the potential for health issues and the toll on mental well-being were all reasons I felt justified in my concerns.

Then there was the social aspect. Would India miss out on building meaningful relationships? I worried that her dedication to gaming would alienate her from her peers, leaving her isolated and lacking the interpersonal skills necessary to thrive in a professional setting. What would other parents think of me? I could already hear the whispers: “Look at that delinquent parent, letting her child waste time on video games.” The judgement felt real.

As I began to look deeper into the world of esports, I realised there were even more significant issues that I had not initially considered. The online gaming environment can be rife with toxic behaviour, including racism and misogyny. I had read about the challenges female gamers face, often subjected to harassment and discrimination simply for participating in a space that should be inclusive and welcoming. The idea that my daughter could experience such abuse was shocking and I wanted to protect her.

However, as the mother of an only child, I knew I had one chance to get it right, or as close to right as I could. I realised early on that this did not mean choosing her path in life or living my unrealised dreams through her. What it actually meant was the promise that I would love her unconditionally, support her dreams even when I did not see her vision, and be her fiercest and loudest cheerleader. This mentality allowed me to collaborate with her to help her grow into a brilliant, compassionate, funny individual with a dry sense of humour—someone who is extremely confident and at 16, made history. By 19, she has already accomplished more than some adults do in a lifetime.

While gaming, like many things in life, comes with risks and challenges, if approached sensibly and not merely as a "game," it can be beneficial and rewarding in countless ways. I will not recite the standard views or list the transferable skills your children can gain from gaming, though those are indeed true. Instead, I want to share MY perspective on what gaming has given my daughter.

Firstly, we have an amazing bond because of gaming. While we do not game together, I have watched 90 per cent of her games and earned the nickname “Mother Dearest.” Most importantly, I have had the honour and pleasure of seeing India represent herself, some of the largest brands, and the UK on platforms and stages she would not have encountered but for gaming and esports.

The support and encouragement her father and I have given her over the years have instilled in her the belief that she can dream anything and that her dreams have value, even if she has no examples to follow. This has created a confidence in her that is bold and unapologetic. Esports has given her a platform to advocate for diversity and inclusion in the gaming and technology fields. Esports has given India the opportunity to make a difference and open doors for women from all backgrounds.

Further, her passion and success in esports have allowed her to earn an income for herself from the age of 14. The possibilities surrounding esports and gaming show that there are alternative options available to the next generation to not only support themselves but build viable careers and businesses doing what they love. This is very exciting. The roles India has held in esports have taught her so much about contract negotiations, intellectual property, responsibilities, time management, teamwork and what it means to represent a brand professionally, areas she would not be exposed to at her age.

Additionally, gaming has provided me with a platform to teach India invaluable life lessons. Through gaming moments, I have been able to discuss and share vital lessons with her, such as how to keep herself safe online, handle bullying, and understand the importance of mental health. We have talked about eating well, maintaining a social life, and having hobbies and friends outside of gaming. I have taught her how to work through and deal with failure, practise gratitude, and navigate situations when things do not go as planned. Essentially, using gaming as a teaching tool has made it easier for these important messages to take root and resonate with her.

The skills India gained from gaming and esports have also significantly improved her academic performance and public speaking abilities. The strategic thinking and problem-solving skills she developed through gaming translated into better grades and a deeper understanding of her school subjects. Additionally, her involvement in esports required her to communicate effectively with teammates and present herself confidently in front of large audiences. These experiences have opened up new career paths for her, showcasing the diverse opportunities that gaming can offer.

Esports has offered her opportunities to travel and gain experiences that she probably would not have had otherwise, such as winning a Commonwealth esports gold medal at the age of 16. Most importantly, esports has provided India and other gamers around the world with the opportunity to attend university on scholarships, allowing them to pursue whatever they want to study without massive student debt.

So, while gaming like many things in life, if not done correctly and in moderation, can be harmful, my perspective is that gaming and esports have the potential to change lives in incredibly positive ways. I am so proud of India Alanis and everything she has accomplished. It is essential for parents to educate themselves about the benefits and risks associated with gaming and esports. By doing so, we can support our children in pursuing their passions while preparing them to make the most of what the gaming and esports industry has to offer. Ultimately, it is not about whether gaming is inherently good or bad but about how we can guide our children to engage with it in a healthy and constructive manner.