The Paradox of Effort: The Harder You Try, The Harder You Fail

Today at a glance:

1. Ever feel like the harder you push, the more stuck you become? There’s a reason for that, it’s called the Paradox of Effort.
2. Discover the power of Wu Wei, a Daoist principle of effortless action, and how letting go can lead to more productivity and clarity.
3. Want practical steps to get unstuck and embrace flow? Learn how stepping back might just be the key to moving forward.

Answers don’t come easy.

I know this all too well. Right now, I’m stuck in a place where I feel completely paralyzed.

Maybe you’ve been there too, staring at a blank page, desperately searching for clarity. And the more you try to push through, the more elusive the answers become.

It’s frustrating, isn’t it? We want so badly to solve our problems, to reach our goals, and yet, the harder we try, the more stuck we feel.

And so because I want to stop feeling unstuck, I researched how, and while I found a way, I discovered something else.

It’s okay to be confused.

Because we need confusion to make room for clarity. It’s all part of the process.

The paradox here is that sometimes, the more we push for answers, the further away they seem.

This phenomenon is known as the Paradox of Effort, and it’s something I come to discover I’ve wrestled with for months.

The Paradox of Effort

The harder you try to force a solution, the harder it can be to find one.

This idea, coined by the writer Aldous Huxley, suggests that effort, when taken to an extreme, can be counterproductive. In many situations, exerting more mental or physical effort doesn’t necessarily lead to success.

It can have the opposite effect.

Think about it: have you ever tried to fall asleep by telling yourself to just sleep? The more you force it, the more restless you become.

Or maybe you’ve been trying to solve a complex problem, and no matter how much you rack your brain, the solution just won’t come.

The harder we try, the more anxious we get, and that anxiety only clouds our ability to perform.

How Excessive Effort Holds Us Back

This paradox shows up in different areas of life, from sports to creative work.

Consider athletes, for example. A soccer player who overthinks their penalty shot is more likely to miss. They’re so focused on getting everything just right that they psych themselves out.

The same thing happens when we overthink in creative endeavors.

Writer’s block is a perfect example. You sit down to write, determined to produce something brilliant, but nothing flows.

Pressure builds up and it goes on to become your biggest obstacle.

The antithesis of trying too hard is how things get better.

Wu Wei: The Power of Letting Go

In Daoism, there’s a concept called Wu Wei, which can be translated as “effortless action.”

It’s the idea of doing without forcing, letting things unfold naturally.

It may sound counterintuitive, but sometimes the best way to achieve something is to step back and allow it to happen.

Society often teaches us that surrender is a sign of weakness. But Wu Wei tells us the opposite.

Surrender it’s not about giving up, but about recognizing when to stop pushing and let things flow. There’s wisdom in knowing your limits and trusting the process.

Wu Wei implores us to swim with the current instead of against it. In it, you get to embrace the forces around you, moving with ease rather than struggle.

Applying Wu Wei and the Paradox of Effort

Now the big question

How do you put this into practice? Is the paradox of effort and Wu Wei realistic enough to harness in your daily life? Yes, it is.

1. First, start by identifying areas where your excessive effort isn’t getting you the desired results.

Are you forcing yourself to finish a creative project that feels stuck?

Are you stressing over trying to meet expectations you’ve set too high?

Note them down.

2. Step away.

Throw the expectations away.

Give your mind and body the space to reset. Take a walk, meditate, or do something unrelated to the task at hand.

Let your brain relax into what it already knows.

Often, solutions will come to you when you least expect them, while you’re doing dishes, daydreaming, or in the toilet (you know yourselves).

3. Start Small.

Practice focusing on small actions rather than overthinking the big picture.

If you’re struggling with writer’s block, for instance, don’t sit down to write a masterpiece.

Trying to be perfect on the first try can paralyze you, but if you allow yourself to create without the weight of perfectionism, you’ll likely find more joy and productivity in your work.

Write that messy first draft, by first writing a single sentence. Then let that sentence turn into a paragraph and then paragraphs, all without the pressure of perfection.

These are the moments that bring the authenticity and depth you are looking for, to what you create.

4. Do more of the natural stuff.

Everybody wants to do novel things because we have been programmed to think that people always want novel things.

The writer is looking for new topics to write. The technician is looking for innovative solutions to problems that have been addressed thousands of times before.

Yet, often, it’s the simple, familiar, and even mundane that can spark the greatest insights.

So instead of chasing the latest trends or forcing creativity, immerse yourself in the natural rhythm of your work and let your ideas bubble up organically.

And it's great to start with these activities before you go into one that is hard. Why?

The energy will trip over into something that doesn’t come easily and energy is contagious.

5. Finally, Trust the Process.

This is one thing is need to tell myself because one of the most challenging yet rewarding aspects of navigating the Paradox of Effort is trusting in the process.

Remember when I said it is okay to be confused? Yes. If you don’t know something now, go through the motions. It is part of the process.

Understand that growth takes time, and your journey isn’t linear.

When you accept that there will be ups and downs, you can better appreciate the value of patience and persistence over time.

Focus on getting smarter and better, and you’ll find that breakthroughs come more easily when you stop obsessing over them.

Let Go to Move Forward

It’s tempting to believe that the more effort we put in, the better the outcome will be.

But as the paradox of effort teaches us, sometimes trying too hard only makes things worse.

Wu Wei reminds us that success often comes from knowing when to ease up and when to allow things to simply unfold.

So, if you’re feeling stuck, maybe it’s time to stop trying so hard.

You might just find that by letting go, everything falls into place.

Remember, you've got this.

Till next time,

Salud.

In Case You Missed It:

Last week, I wrote about Knowing When to Leave or Stay where we navigate the puzzle of leaving or staying in a difficult commitment, and five ideas for deciding when to leave or to stay.

Recommendations:

• The Roads Not Taken: Drawing on concepts from psychology, the piece distinguishes between mistakes and slips, advocating for a mindset that embraces exploration and discovery rather than rigid adherence to initial goals.
• How I Cured My Procrastination: The article emphasizes how we can reduce the mental pain associated with procrastination by spreading out work over time, and retrain our brains to find enjoyment in completing tasks.