Palma, we are coming!

Holiday season ?? – having a good start to spend quality time with family and friends…maybe. Unfortunately we have chosen Friday, 19th 2024 ?- and some CrowdStrike Falcon Surface (formerly Reposify) IT super ninjas ???? had different plans (hold on, why didn’t they wait 8 weeks to catch a “Friday 13th??).

Anyway, what happen will happen – but nothing can stop a “Pro” with survival experience from Eyjafjallaj?kull ?? event in 2010 and annual four-digit extra income from EU air passenger rights ??.

Being prepared for the super #agility and fast #response time of Eurowings Digital (/irony off) and being trained from #AirportDUS security hiccups in the past, we wouldn’t be stopped from a Terminal A full of queues and 1.000s of people ??. ?

Fighting through to Biz check-in desk (yes, we know it is by default just one counter for the incumbent German airline in DUS at the largest airport in NRW - the largest metropolitan area in the world ??). Queuing up, we are used to it – just decrease customer service level low enough over decades and German customers wouldn’t even think about complaining ??. Its oligopolistic structures anyway.

Being finally at the desk (not before, at the desk after queuing 30min) we learned, that today all rules and processes are lifted (no priority, no nothing) and check-in will be handled based on paper and flight by flight (nothing can shock the Germans, we love paperwork ?? – government still using FAX machines in 2024….which by the way are #Crowdstrike bullet proof ??).

Anyway, lets check in parallel the flight ?? status…50/50 chance according to news (according to #Eurowings “80% of all flights will operate” ??). #Eurowings app says “on time”…email popping up with cancelled ??. Okay, that’s the sign for “greyhound racing” to start…take out two mobiles in parallel and just book four tickets for next day, whatever it takes (costs). #Eurowings portal down, no surprise; Ryanair - Europe's Favourite Airline would work – but travelling by car to Weeze ??, no. Ok – check my favorite company in my stock portfolio (#BKNG – “worldclass IT”)…and, yes – of course it works ??. Done deal – 300% price markup, but who cares – much lower than opportunity costs. And confirmed, with EW record locator and issued ticket numbers. Palma, we are coming ??.

Fast forward, Saturday morning, 06:30h - #Eurowings IT Ops guys did some night shifts – portal up and running. Go for check-in…oops

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Ok – might be an issue in the backend APIs. So I just call #Eurowings customer care to validate; I am still early, most people still sleeping ??. In worst case just rebook the old cancelled flight for later today – expect to wait some time, but for sure 24h after the biggest IT incident in modern history occurred #Eurowings COO Edi Wolfensberger has set up massive task force and increased Call Center capacity by 10x…..maybe 5x……maybe at least 2x? ??

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Ok…likely not. ???? ?“should I stay or should I go”…finally, after 2h on the line Eastern Europe woke up. Friendly agent on the line ????. “Can’t find the new booking” from Booking.com we made and paid for (1k EUR one way)…so what, just maybe rebook the cancelled flight on our old tickets ??….”no flights today”…ok, sure then lets do tomorrow. Done deal, we have a backup for Sunday, 12h direct flight. “Confirmation will come by email in max 5min”. Palma, we are coming ??.

But in any case let’s head to the airport, maybe we can still fix the #BKNG ticket issue at check-in or ticket counter in the Terminal and fly today…while we drive calling #BKNG customer service to validate on their side.

Wow – wait time only 3min, and even better – the IVR system regularly gives you updated real time waiting time; how is that even possible ??. #BKNG CTO Rob Francis must be a rock star ??!

Ok – all validated. Ticket is issued, confirmed, we can check-in today says #BKNG.

Fast forward: Terminal A – on that single (!) Biz class check-in desk after queuing 30min: “Nope – no ticket, record locator not known, do not find your names – and by the way, you are also not on the Sunday flight” ?? ??. Ok, Palma, we are not coming ??.

Ok, can you fix it for me; if not, maybe at least quickly call backoffice to fix? “Nope – pls queue at the ticket office”. You mean that single (!) counter on the other end of Terminal A with 3 kilometer of people waiting in front? Yes, the only option. ??

While waiting on that queue (yes, people in front of line validated 3h waiting time ??), I was dreaming of my other favorite stock in my long term portfolio (#AAPL). They are so smart, they can even use working students running around the shop with an iPad to fix ad hoc problems ??. The tablets are fully connected to the backend system, so that nobody really needs to queue up and can be easily scaled within minutes. Call 10 students, pay them 1k a day, explain them how to do on a backend portal three clicks semi-automated rebooking. Easy.

#Eurowings COO Edi Wolfensberger for sure never been to US to experience that…else he might have thought about sending a task force of #Eurowings employees with iPads to the biggest German airports. It is Saturday anyway, maybe some Mo-Fri office employees available; or maybe not possible – we have the “Gewerkschaft & Betriebsrat”, and everyone working “from home” anyway ??. Students must have been trained in advanced – also not an option…ok, fair enough. I acknowledge, we just have to get used to being worst in customer service and maybe we also have to get used to a downward trend GDP in Germany. Maybe give it up for good old Germany?

Or call a “Pro”? ??

I am sure there is a solution for many “unforeseen” IT issues… #AIOps #Observability #Resilience #Agility #PlatformEngineering #SRE #ChaosEngineering

But not now – tomorrow we try again (DUS – ZRH – PMI). Maybe Palma, we are coming ??

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Disclaimer: Personal opinion only - Satire only - food for though

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