PAIN: Positive Attitude In Negative Situations

As Seneca says: “We suffer more often in imagination that in reality.” That voice in your head conducts you to all the negative thinking, wasting your time on thinking of how all the things are going to end bad, you need to remove it. We, often times, worry for nothing. Things will end in a good way for every one of us. Many of the things that cause us stress and anxiety, are a product of the imagination, not reality. Don’t let anxiety and worry get the best of you. Stay in the present. Focus on what you can control.

Everything is negative, life is the worst, like hell. No way, to go, no solution, complexities, confusion, stress. Accept it. Okay, things are bad, they are genuinely bad, it's my fate, they had to be like this. My life wants me to suffer. To fall prey to stress. I won't. What can I do? Nothing. What best can I do in this moment? There's something. So, I will do it. What about all the negativity, stress and bad thoughts? Let them stay, I will shut my mind, and do what best I can. What will happen in the future? I don't know, no one knows, what will be, will be.

What I can do is to try and give my best. What about people, competitors, family, colleagues, shame, judgements, mockery? It's my life, I will live my way, I don't care, go to hell everyone. I am responsible for myself first. I will close my mind to everything, make it numb, high on my deeds and not low for the world. I will try, do my best, keep myself happy, feel loved and pampered. And see through this phase. That's it. This is life, such phases ought to be.

Living a peaceful life does not only mean focusing on the positive . There is truth in the idea that there is so much negative happening around us. But it is also true that “life thrives in duality,” that is, we will not know what a positive is without the negative side of it, they complement each other. So, we could stay positive but there is that awareness and the knowledge we maintain that negativity also thrives in the same grid of a positive life. We were simply are aware of their presence, but we avoid doing them. Awareness make us live in harmony with positivity and negativity. But it required a strong will to be able to do it. Discipline is a must.

This is going to be a rather unconventional take on this topic, but in my point of view the answer is: You can’t. Sexism, Rape, War, Starvation, Disease, Discrimination, Suicide, Depression, Child Abuse, Kidnapping, Animal Abuse, Extinction, Global Warming, Waste, Torture, and even Slavery and many more horrible things are still part of our world. We can try to deny this as much as we want, but in certain dark areas of the world these things still exist. Paying attention to all of them will undoubtedly get you into a worse state of mind.

You cannot fight all the negativity in the world; but the other side to that is that you do not have to. As hard as this may sound, you have to turn away from some of the problems that exist in this world or the burden of it all will crush you. That is not to say you should blatantly ignore them when they appear in front of you, but please do not try to shoulder the responsibility of everything going on all on your own. In my opinion, it is much better to pick a few battles that you truly support than fake your support for everything that comes your way.

If you avoid being a sheep that mindlessly clicks the “Like” button on a sad Facebook Post, in the hopes that that will actually do something, and instead makes a difference in that area by actually donating, volunteering or taking your own initiative to raise awareness, you will find yourself much more positive. The reason we are so burdened by this is because we either shoulder all the responsibility or realize we are not taking any part in the problems of the world at all. It is both the burden and the lack of responsibility that often results in complete inaction and that makes us feel worse overall.

However, if we were to truly shoulder a bit we would see that the world is changing for the better and seeing that there is progress is one of the best ways to remain positive about it all. The truth is that the reason we can even discuss everything going wrong in the world is because we have it so well that we can give more to people outside of ourselves. We have the means to shoulder the responsibility of others only when we are doing well enough ourselves. Now, not everyone is doing that well, and if you are one of those that is barely getting by then please reach out for help instead of spreading yourself even thinner!

You can only give what you have to spare to the world! Because of this reason as well, I recommend that you do not try to shoulder everything. Take care of yourself first, as selfish as that may seem to you, for it is then that you can give more to others! You know this as you have experienced this in the past. The time you were the best support for a friend in need or that you could give to your family was when you had a great day or when you were doing well. If you give $5 when you have none to spare, you will be needing those $5 from somewhere else. But if you give $5 when you have thousands to spare then your addition does not cause any lack.

The same principle as with money applies with Happiness. Which means that if you shoulder the responsibility of everything negative in the world, you will undoubtedly get more negative yourself which causes a lack that needs to be filled. However, if you pick your battles and actually fight them while turning away from other battles, you will end up more positive with more to give. It’s hard to describe this but I hope my point of view makes sense. I pick a few battles that I donate to every month while leaving the rest behind. Which means I consciously choose not to get further involved in these problems of the world because I have chosen not to do anything about them.

And while that may seem like a horrible thing, I would say that I am aware of my capabilities and limits and am consciously trying my best over unconsciously pretending that I can. It is because of this that I still feel like I am making a difference and progressing certain agendas, which ends up with me making a net-positive impact on the world. I believe that when I am at my best, when I am happy, free, financially secure, loved and have my life together, that I am able to impart the most positivity I can. It is this focus that makes me stay positive. In the end I believe it is about picking your battles given your energy and limits at the time.

Do not try to exceed yourself and spread yourself too thin. Instead focus on yourself first and then give what you have left over to others. Pick the battles that are important to you and let the rest of the world worry about the others. None of us can shoulder the responsibility of everything negative all on our own. But if we were to truly pick our battles and take those few, select fights seriously, then we could make a lasting difference in the world. At least, that is what I choose to believe to stay positive in spite of all this negativity.