Overwhelm Damages Relationships & Reputations

In the first article in this series, we looked at the opportunity cost of overwhelm (and it costs a great deal in case you were wondering).?In this article, let’s think about how relationships and reputations are negatively affected when you (or your team) are in overwhelm.?Acknowledging this will help you make the case that you need a coach who can help you move from overwhelm to “just whelmed.”

The impact of overwhelm on relationships and reputations may be internal or external.?For example:?

Internal (colleagues)

• People counting on you to get something done – what happens when you can’t or don’t get it done because you are overwhelmed??When it’s a rare occurrence, it generally won’t damage the relationship or reputation.?When it’s common…then it is quite damaging.
• Your supervisor who made a strong case for you to be hired and you are not delivering at the expected level.?You want to honor those who have honored you with their trust.
• Admin staff who are willing to step up and support you but have been treated dismissively in the past when you were overwhelmed.?We all desperately need our admin staff on our sides!!!
• New hires who remember your brusqueness or seeming inability to have any time for them when they were asking you questions during their interview.?These people will be your colleagues potentially for years.?What was the first impression they had of you??

External ?

• Collaborators from other organizations.?People talk.?They talk to other people at other organizations.?They talk within their organizations.?They talk to people at your organization.?Do you want your overwhelm or the results of your overwhelm to be what they’re talking about??
• People across campus.?Whether you’re at a small institution or a behemoth, word gets around.?What’s the word on you (and your team)?
• People in the community.?Your community depends on who you serve through your work.?Could be your neighborhood, your spiritual community, your non-profit work, your cultural community, your professional community.?Think about whether your overwhelm might be seeping out beyond you…
• Agencies directly related to the work you are doing – or trying to do – and where the relationships with people are key (processing paperwork, notifying you about opportunities, keeping you abreast of developments, promotion of you and your work, and so on).??If people are counting on you and you’re counting on them, you want to be someone who lives up to your promises just like you want them to live up to theirs.
• Someone writing a letter to the editor (or posting in social media, which is the more likely venue, and since such posts are often written at the height of emotion, comments can be rather caustic at times).?

Start thinking about the cost of damaged relationships with alumni and donors as well as with internal colleagues and other units on campus or whatever kind of organization you work within.?If overwhelm is costing you (your university, your company, your non-profit, etc.) because you are not able to prepare adequately for a meeting with a wealthy donor or investor, is that something that has a dollar figure??You know it does – and so does the person you are approaching about investing in your coaching.?

Although it may be difficult to share, if it is safe and you have an example of a recent time where overwhelm led to a relationship or reputation setback that either was costly or the damage was narrowly averted, run the numbers on it so you have a fresh, relevant example to talk about when you are strategically making the ask for an investment in your coaching.

I have a publication series (available to you at no cost) about how to acknowledge your value when you’re asking someone to pay for the coaching support you’re requesting.?Feel free to take a look here and see if one of these publications would be helpful to you.?https://meggin.com/coaching/#makingtheask?

About Meggin McIntosh

Helping people reframe their limiting beliefs is a big part of the joyful work I do as a coach. Sometimes I offer group coaching in addition to working with individual clients. It's amazing to watch people generate reframes for a belief that has held them back in the past.

I am thankful every day.