Overthinking: your worst enemy!

We probably all know the feeling. The feeling of getting lost in thought. “Should I do this?” “Yeah I should, but what if…” “Or what if…” “Or maybe…”. There are thousands of examples of overthinking. Most people overthink from time to time, resulting in being indecisive and feeling terrible. Or at least that’s how I feel, if you ask me. But what is overthinking and what does it do with you? How does it affect me and how do I try to get rid of it? Why is it the worst enemy? Find it all out below in this week’s blog about overthinking!

After calling with my buddy Zelmeg the day before yesterday, speaking about overthinking and worrying too much we agreed on a few things. The major thing we agreed on was that we shouldn’t be overthinking and worrying, since we both didn’t have one valid reason to feel bad for ourselves and get lost in negativity.

But lets go back to overthinking first. What is it and what does it do with you? Overthinking is the inability to get out of your own head, resulting in thinking about every single thought that pops into your head. According to research, overthinking increases the chances of mental illness, interferes with problem solving and it disturbs your sleep. In short, it doesn’t help you. At all.

Copyrights: https://identity-mag.com/how-to-stop-overthinking-from-ruining-your-life/

But that’s probably the main cause of the whole problem: you know it is bad and you know you shouldn’t be doing it. You keep telling yourself that you shouldn’t overthink, that everything will be all right, that you will get back on track soon etc. etc. You end up thinking about the fact that you are overthinking, resulting in nothing but stress, frustration and maybe even depression.

 This phenomenon of thinking about your thinking is called the ‘Feedback Loop from Hell’ in the book the Subtle Art of not Giving a Fuck, written by Mark Branson. And I couldn’t agree more with that definition. It is terrible since you are stressing about literally nothing. But still you feel like the whole world is leaning on your shoulders and every decision feels heavy.

 Overthinking has kept me from taking action, doing my (morning) routine, reading books, doing inspirational stuff and more over the course of the last few weeks. It has made me lazy, unmotivated and un-energized. It has given me the feeling of frustration, anger and unhappiness. And it sounds so easy to get rid of, to stop doing, but in practice it turns out I am quite bad at beating it…!

To come back to the story I started with, the call with my buddy Zelmeg. After we discussed that we both felt the same way, we just started to laugh at ourselves. We started to analyse how ridiculous our behaviour of the last weeks actually has been. We shared examples of absurdity, about how our brains could fuck with us. And we realize that fighting the thoughts is only making them worse, ensuing more negative thoughts.

Copyrights: https://markmanson.net/feedback-loop-from-hell

So why am I writing this blog? Why am I writing about something that I am doing that is negative and is the most ridiculous thing you can do? Good question. But I am writing this because I am still in it. I am still not there yet, but I know that sharing how I feel, that sharing what I think and that talking with the people around me helps. And it helps big time, trust me on that one. After that call the day before yesterday, I felt so much better. Not because Zelmeg was experience similar thoughts, but simply because by talking I got out of my head. I noticed the thoughts and didn’t try to fight them. I let them come, spoke them out loud and laughed at them, instead of trying to find the reason why they are there. 

So how do I try to stop overthinking? What do I do to get rid of that terrible feeling? Well, first of all I am still struggling with it. I am not doing the things I want to do on a daily basis and I still don’t feel the energy I felt a few months ago. But it all starts with acceptance. With acknowledging that you don’t feel how you want to feel, but that that’s okay. Avoid the Feedback Loop from Hel by not fighting the negative thoughts but rather accepting them. Secondly, as I mentioned before, talk, talk and talk. Talking about it gets those thoughts out of your head. When you say them it’s so much easier to put them in perspective and relativize them, instead of fighting them in your own head. And I know, sometimes it feels ridiculous to talk about something that you can really put into place, but by trying you get a long way!

Copyrights:  https://www.therandomvibez.com/funny-overthinking-quotes/stressful-overthinking-quotes/ (even though the quality sucks, I still find it a really powerful saying)

To conclude, take action. Even though you don’t feel like doing stuff, get that inner engine up and running and push through. Do the stuff you don’t feel like doing and you will feel better afterwards. I would especially advise you to work out. Move your body, even if it’s just for a walk. That’s the best medicine for me. After yesterday’s boxing class I feel so much better. Don’t let your overthinking stop you from living the life you want to live! 

Copyrights: https://quotefancy.com/quote/757933/Honor-de-Balzac-It-is-easy-to-sit-up-and-take-notice-What-is-difficult-is-getting-up-and

Before I let you go, I can say: “don’t overthink, it’s not worth it”, but I know once you overthink it’s easier said than done. And therefore I’ll say: “It will be okay and you will be okay. Be grateful and focus on the things you already have. You don’t have to always find the reason why you overthink. Notice the thoughts, laugh at them and take action to get rid of them! Great things are coming for you!”