Overcoming Challenges

There comes a time for most of us when we experience challenges in our work and life that block our growth, and that of our business.

?? Maybe you have a big decision to make with no time to make it and conflicting pulls that tug you in different directions and leave you feeling hopelessly confused.

?? Perhaps a tricky relationship has really got under your skin and become stressful and frustratingly sleep disturbing.

?? Or an old recurring pattern like self-doubt or guilt is rearing its troublesome head again and you just don’t know what to do to move beyond it.

Every woman I work with expects a lot of herself and aims high. She comes to me because she chooses to address her inner fears and outer obstacles, and wants to empower herself through professional guidance. She knows that dealing with challenges is how she evolves and grows.

There's a lot I could say about tools for working through challenges and if you want detail, dive into PART THREE of my book THE STABILITY EFFECT where I share a range of mind, body, spirit/energetic techniques to move beyond what holds you back.

For Midlife Magic I'll cut to the chase with what I’ve seen to be the ESSENTIAL foundation for all techniques to consistently overcome challenges in the lives and work of my clients, and that is self-compassion.

?? The voice of self-compassion

There’s the challenge itself and then there’s the way you meet the challenge.

Holding a compassionate stance towards yourself as you engage in challenges is a key practice that supports your progress and generates resilience.

Dr Kristin Neff explains that self-compassion is an emotionally positive self-attitude and differentiates between two types: tender self-compassion and fierce self-compassion.

With the unconditional self-worth provided by tender self-compassion, we find it easier to risk failure, while the encouragement provided by fierce self-compassion, gives us the energy and momentum needed to move forward.

Self-compassion lies beyond the fear that triggers the nervous system and is a powerful ally that enables you to accept where you are and turn away from inner conversations that aren't serving you. With an ongoing practice of self-compassion, it is possible to change the voice of your inner judge and greatest critic into one of empathy, understanding and empowerment, to support you to meet difficulties in a courageous, helpful way.

Without self-compassion you can fall into the trap of forgetting your strengths. You might stop trusting yourself. You might get stuck in endless unhelpful self-analysis. You might listen to self-talk that shames, blames and compares. You might become overly involved in what other people think and say about you and be unable to see yourself kindly and clearly. It’s hard to own your wisdom, gather your courage and move into action under such treacherous conditions.

?? Your situation

What aspect of your work or life is challenging you right now and causing you to give yourself an unreasonably hard time?

For that challenge: name it, notice what you're saying it means about you, and if you can, notice how that inner dialogue feels in your body and where you feel it.

Then become your own best friend, the woman who has self-compassion for herself. Really feel into this aspect of you. What do you say to yourself when self-compassion leads? If you can, notice where this new inner dialogue shows up in your body and the physical sensations it generates.

Email me at [email protected] to let me know how you get on.

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?? Hello, I'm Amanda Muckalt, and I inspire midlife women in leadership to thrive in change. If you want coaching support in your leadership, check out my menu of SUMMER OFFERS HERE. You can DM me or e-mail me at [email protected] to find out more about one of them or book in.

If your organisation wants help with leadership coaching, designing and facilitating masterclasses, and creating environments where leaders can thrive, DM me or e-mail me at [email protected] and we can arrange an initial call.

?? Find a free copy of THE STABILITY EFFECT, my #1 amazon BESTSELLING book HERE. PART THREE is dedicated to Overcoming Challenges.

?? Everyone is welcome in the Midlife Magic newsletter. While written for women in leadership as my main client base, specialist area, and authentic lived experience, everyone is free to subscribe, read, comment. Whoever you are, if there’s something here that makes your life and leadership more joyous, impactful and easy, then we’re all winning.