Over Time the Connections Get Easier

While spending time with a group of Bible Study friends, one of them shared an important point about friendship when he said …

“I’ve come to realize that connections get easier over time.”

At first, his statement failed to resonate, but it soon came to me, and the message is beautiful.

Early Connections

To set the context, I will share how I formed connections with others throughout the early part of my working life. In fact, for most of my life, I viewed connections with others as a mere transaction.

After all, in the business way of doing things, forming many connections means we are networking. Before the arrival of social media platforms, some of us owned business card scanning devices.

The goal was to form as many connections as possible. I remember one colleague boasted that he had more than 1,000 people in his digital Rolodex. For those of you too young to remember a Rolodex, this is a good Google moment!

The point here is connections were hard to form in the past because quid pro quo was in play. In other words, meeting others meant we could expand our circle of influence for the purpose of monetizing the relationships. 

Connections Today

My friend continued the story about connections by stating the following …

“Guys! I realize today that when all I have to offer is friendship, it’s far easier to make a connection with others. I’m not selling anything, and I’m not looking to buy anything. The connection takes place only because we care about each other.”

There are still many times today when I find myself wanting to meet people for the sole purpose of business gain, and I have to force myself to slow down. It’s true making key contacts is important to career success, but the trust in the relationship must first be established.

There is another key part of the equation to consider. If my only goal is to network like crazy, I will soon learn I’m failing to also make connections with the people who matter the most to me.

What if, instead of only expanding my business contact list, I realize the need to spend more time with my family and friends? These are connections that can become frail over time, which means they need constant attention.

In fact, recently, while vacationing with my family, my kids mentioned to me that they enjoyed spending the day with me fully engaged in fun activities. They were surprised I dedicated the entire day with them. As a family, we went to breakfast, worked out, swam in the pool, had BBQ for lunch, played volleyball, walked the beach, and capped it with a nice dinner.

I think what my friend is saying is starting to make even more sense now … the most beautiful connections we can make with others get easier because when trust is established, the relationships are readily available. However, for many people, a mindset change is also necessary.

Instead of only thinking money must exchange hands for value to be gained, we must look at value differently.

The best value is when we show kindness and appreciation to others without expecting anything in return.

This message is simple, and the connections are boundless.

Homework Inquiry

During the next week, here’s your homework inquiry: What action can you take to form non-monetary connections?