Our Family's Journey with Dyslexia

I have been contemplating for some time whether I should write this article. But recently, I came across two articles on LinkedIn, "Reading Between the Lines, Dsylexia's Emotional Toll in Home and School Life," by Melania Brethour, and "Neurodiversity in Children and the Struggles of being Misdiagnosed" by Shannon Jordan. These articles prompted me to share my family's journey of raising two Dyslexic children.

We are the parents of two Dyslexics. Our family was very fortunate as we found out our son Amir was dyslexic at a very young age. We had Amir evaluated in 2005 when he was about five and a half years old. Before he was assessed, he was in speech therapy. While this was working, he struggled in school with recalling sight words and having difficulty reading words and spelling, in addition to various other issues concerning my husband and me. We spent many nights at our kitchen table trying to assist him with completing short homework assignments. We would get so frustrated at the time that words repeated daily, using flashcards, could not be pronounced and recalled. This kitchen table produced many tears for all three of us: Amir, Troy, and I.

Amir struggled to acquire academic skills in kindergarten. We were concerned because he was easily discouraged and exhibited low self-confidence. His kindergarten teacher also expressed concern that he could not keep up with his classmates and took longer to complete tasks. He would also require additional explanations to assist him with finishing assignments. His kindergarten teacher was pleasant, helpful, and accommodating as we worked to determine the root causes of his issues.

We also kept in close contact with the speech therapist and expressed our concerns and frustrations about what we were experiencing. One day, when having one of our talks with the speech therapist, she advised that she also had concerns and recommended that we get Amir a neuropsychological evaluation to obtain more specific information about his cognitive and language skills and to obtain recommendations regarding academic planning.

We scheduled a session with a neuropsychologist, and two weeks later, Amir went for an evaluation with her. Before the session, we had his kindergarten teacher and speech therapist complete a questionnaire to get a baseline about Amir's overall personality and the challenges they noticed in him, as this was one of the requirements from the neuropsychologist. Amir's evaluation with the neuropsychologist in one day lasted approximately 6 hours with a 1-hour break from lunch. The completed result took a little over two weeks, but we got on the neuropsychologist's schedule to review the results formally.

The entire report, which included 14 pages, was reviewed with us. The assessment had a battery of tests (age-appropriate Differential Ability Scales, (preschool clusters, preschool subtests, the Peabody Picture Vocabulary Test, and Clinical Evaluation of Language Fundamentals), just to name a few. These results and an explanation of all the tests and the reasons behind them were so helpful in allowing us to understand better the issues that Amir was facing.

While the entire report was very beneficial, the last two and a half pages, titled "Diagnostic Testing Suggestions," were the most important. The reason is that those pages gave us, as well as future teachers and those dealing with Amir in an academic setting, tools and steps to use while working with him. Amir was officially diagnosed with dyslexia, a neurodivergent disability. Finding out Amir had dyslexia is a blessing in disguise. We finally had an answer to why Amir struggled and why everything we tried was not working.

"Neurodiversity is the way that the brain shows variation between humans. These variations include social skills, learning abilities, communication, attention span, mood and others. We know them as Dsylexia, Dyscalculia, Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD), ADHD, Tourettes and others." "Common learning disabilities include dyslexia, dyscalculia, and dysgraphia. These aren't the same as intellectual disabilities and does not mean below-average."

After receiving the results, we were advised to review the report again and focus mainly on the last two and a half pages. The neuropsychologist recommended reading "Overcoming Dyslexia" by Sally Shywitz, MD. We immediately enrolled Amir in a local learning center that helps children overcome and deal with learning differences, including Dyslexia, ADHD, and working memory deficits. The reading center tutors were trained extensively on the Orton-Gillighman curriculum. We also found and immersed ourselves in books or articles about dyslexia so we could fully understand as much as possible and assist with getting him all he needed to succeed.

Upon receiving the results from the neuropsychologist, my husband asked her if he could schedule a testing session with her to find out if he had dyslexia. The reason is that he struggled a lot with some of the issues we noticed with Amir when he was younger, but he was never tested, nor did he ever receive any assistance. The neuropsychologist immediately indicated that she did not recommend him being tested. The reason for this is that many parents when getting the results, want to find out if they were the ones who passed on dyslexia to their children. She reviewed our family file about our careers and education levels. Based on my husband being a hardware engineer and doing well, her take on it was if he has dyslexia, he managed and overcame any significant issues he faced. I also thought that I could be the one with dyslexia as I also struggled as a kid in my early years. I participated in many after-school reading programs and spent a lot of summers in tutoring programs to ensure I did not lose a lot of my learning from the year by being off during the summer month.

We had Amir enrolled in the learning center program for over a year. While he was in the program, we also decided to get our daughter tested since dyslexia runs in families. Our daughter Asia, who was two years of age when Amir was diagnosed, was later tested and also diagnosed with dyslexia. We also enrolled Asia in the learning center after being diagnosed. For parents who have more than one child with dyslexia, it can range from mild to severe. Amir's dyslexia is mildly severe, while our daughter Asia's is mild. They both struggled in different ways and degrees. While Amir's challenges were quickly recognized, and he had to work harder than most to keep up with his assignments and get work completed, Asia learned many things by osmosis. They also had a tutor/learning specialist who came to their school two times a week to work with them individually for several years through middle school.

Our children attending a small school allowed us to work closely with the school and individual teachers to share the last two and a half pages of Amir's and Asia's evaluations with their respective teachers for the next school year. This documentation allowed the teachers to know in advance what approaches and accommodations were recommended by the neuropsychologists to work with Amir and Asia. We also always gifted each teacher a copy of the book, "Overcoming Dyslexia," to read over the summer if they chose to.

This approach worked very well for most teachers, but unfortunately, we had to deal with a teacher who said, "I am not claiming Amir has dyslexia." This is just one of several issues my husband and I had to deal with to advocate for our children. Parents of most dyslexics know that some educators think all children should learn at the same rate; if they do not, they are lazy and cannot comprehend.

Finding out your child has dyslexia is critical to getting your child the help and resources they need, but you, as a parent, have to be an advocate for your child. Also, you have to encourage them and show them examples of others with dyslexia who have gone on to be successful in their careers. We always printed articles on successful dyslexics and shared them with our children.

As a parent of two dyslexic children, now young adults, we focused much of our effort on what they were passionate about and loved doing. Amir and Asia are both very creative and think outside the box. Amir taught himself Photoshop and other graphic design programs by looking at YouTube videos around ten years of age. Asia loved working with her hands, taught herself to sew, and loved to draw. She would enjoy us taking her to Goodwill to repurpose clothing into something she could wear. They also both enjoy photography.

They both struggled to get where they are today, and the road was not easy, but there are so many tools available today to assist those with dyslexia. Also, the LinkedIn Dyslexic Thinking skill is such a great addition. We realize that even well-meaning educators cannot deny the nagging feeling that something may be wrong. During our journey, especially in the beginning with Amir, we contacted family and friends who were teachers and educators with years of academic experience, explaining the issues to see if they could provide suggestions. Nothing they suggested worked for him, and believe me, we tried many things.

They both still have challenges, but they are very aware of their limitations and where they struggle. While dyslexia has been a hindrance in some ways, we strongly agree that dyslexia has been a massive strength in their young careers. They occasionally rely on spell check and Grammarly, but the strengths of dyslexia far outweigh any negatives.

In many ways, Amir and Asia may be better off as they had to work harder than others to achieve where they are today. Amir is a production graphic designer for a major network news program; he also received a Sports Emmy as part of an award-winning team. Asia is working on building her brand by doing consultant work; they are both graduates of Full Sail University with majors in Digital Arts and Design and Graphic Design, respectively. They are certainly more understanding of the weaknesses and insecurities of others. This trait will serve them well as they carve their paths in this world. This is our journey, but it is one that we hope will propel others to advocate for their family members who may need that help.