The Other Side of RUOK - Am I Safe to Talk To?

If you ask someone RUOK?, and they are feeling OK, then they will most likely happily engage in a conversation with you.

But if they are struggling emotionally for some reason, then they will immediately make a decision “Is it safe for me to share how I am feeling with this person?”

Most people are unsafe to talk to!

Why?

1. A lot of people try to be helpful by giving advice or talking about themselves [with well-meaning intentions, of course!]

2. They do toxic positivity [“You’ll be alright, you’ll get over it”]

3. They don’t care – really! [I suppose I should ask ruok?]

Many people do not know how to do Empathy.

The way they do Sympathy is dead wrong and often hurtful.

Not intentionally, but they have never been taught how to do it well.

Am I Safe to Talk To?

This is an important self-reflective question to ask ourselves.

·??????Do you understand the mental health challenges that people experience? [Are you informed or uninformed?]

·??????Do you know what might be the warning signs – what to look out for and listen for?

·??????Do you know how to have an empathy conversation – not give advice, not patronise and not talk about yourself?

I would love to know if you have ever had the experience in which you shared what you were feeling with someone – at home, with a friend or at work - and they responded by giving you advice, telling you to ‘buck up’, or talking about themselves?

Let me know, I would love to hear it.

I invite you to give your RUOK day a Refresh, or to consider really upskilling your Managers and Team Members during October Mental Health Month and Safe Work Month.