"Orgasm trance" is compensated by success... or is it?

In a culture that spurs us to explore social media and delight in the successes, trips, relationships, delectable meals, and cheerful faces that appear as though they exist in a world of happiness.

It is essential to identify the topics we avoid discussing regarding the most pleasurable intimacy of our sexuality.

Sleeping alone: The Art

During her memoir, Sophie Fontanelle, a French writer and author of the book “The Art of Sleeping Alone”, recounts that she quit sex at twenty-seven and did so for a span of time enduring until she turned 39.

Despite her spouse always telling her they were A sexually satisfied person, what she went through was that she was not happy, and her mate did not feel that, so she determined to go skiing alone in the winter.

She describes her journey in her narrative, her sexuality view shifted: Alone in the sunshine and snow, I absorbed the energy from the sky and mountains, I let my body breathe calmly, and freedom and the whiteness of snow and mountains created in me a kind of ecstasy, as if it were heaven, which prompted me to consider my body, my erotic feelings, and ask myself: “Sophie, is your sex life really stimulating?”

As a result, the answer was: “No,” and it seemed that her sexuality was simply gestures, which she did since everyone else did the same.

In her temporary celibacy, she came upon a tangle of things, such as how people accept all kinds of sexual behavior, and that what matters most is what you do with your body.

Whenever you meet someone, they will ask you questions like: Are you single? Married? Engaged? Gay?

Although it is complicated, sexual activity must take place. We are not machines; we are not programmed for our sex lives. Our sexual encounters are not as effortless as we make them out to be, and even when they are, they are not always satisfying.

“Intense liars, poor liars, we try to confuse each other, especially the French, who are especially big liars, full of contradictions, we are the same” Fontenayle asserts she knows.

While being sexually abstinent, Fontenayle wrote she have been grasping a lot about her body, how art influences eroticism, how dreams work, how soft clothes feel, how vital elegance is, and that she had more fun watching Robert Redford wash Meryl Streep’s hair in “Out of Africa” from being in bed with her.

“Have faith in me. It is the desire, but society does not recognize this kind of joy, but most people want to prove their sexual capability. This is everything, and people are embarrassed to admit that they are alone in their family.”

“Even pleasure can be given to yourself. Many people ask me about?masturbation. I answer you: It is paradise. You enter it alone, complete freedom. Your imagination can sleep with anyone you like. Cary Grant was one of my lovers, in fact.”

In modern society, there isn’t much you can hide, sex is entirely show business, children know their parents’ sexuality, and parents know their children’s sexuality. Privacy is not about what you do but what you can hide, and in our modern society, there isn’t much you can hide.

Openness is good, but sometimes it ruins the situation. Everywhere, the question “Who are you?” is answered with a sexual identity that seems absurd.

Sexual practices are only a part of who we are; we are sensual, floating beings, sometimes sexually happy, sometimes joyful on our own. She concludes by saying: I believe abandonment sometimes is necessary for the soul and the body, and rest, to dream rather than do. When the body wants someone else’s body, it knows exactly what to do. As long as you look into someone’s eye, nature will take care of it. You don’t need to worry about your age, your wrinkles, or your cultural background.

How Does Sexual Abstinence Work?

In our country, there is a climate of conservatism that makes it hard to address issues candidly that are considered socially unacceptable, and citizens often boast of a luxurious and rewarding life.

If we take a deeper look, we can detect the indications of sexual deprivation and previous experiences that play a role in this deprivation: a fear of being judged, a feeling of guilt, a fear of being physically punished for stealing a kiss from a friend or the “neighbor’s son.”

The writer, A.A my friend, has never had sexual relations. He describes the harshness of the experience: “Despite all my achievements in my profession, I feel empty. The world is dark and there is no joy.” A grudge against the world stirred within him because of his inability to exercise his natural right to sex.”

Over time, he felt alienated.

“I cannot cope with it.” And he concludes: “I am losing confidence in myself, and this kills me the most. I am 29 years old and have never had sex. This is the most severe punishment that has been inflicted on me to date.” A question arises here: why does society accept that its members live for years without engaging in sexual activities? Could this affect their happiness?

a happy life without sex

Some believe that professional and social success compensate for “orgasm trance”. Answering a question posed to Quora:?Can?we live a happy life without sex?

Anika Upadhyay, an undergraduate student of Political Science and International Relations, believes that sex is overvalued more than anything else.

What is the best thing about sex? She wonders.

There may be orgasm, or unusual sensuality or intimacy shared by two people, with the average orgasm lasting for several seconds with both men and women, but it has become mandatory for a happy life, but she believes there can be happiness without sex, and cited some people who achieved happiness with scientific or professional achievement.

The original article appeared on Medium

This article is based on a?post?I wrote in Arabic on the Raseef22 website.