orange juice, pancakes, and the next school shooting...

While flipping chocolate chip pancakes, I gave my 9-year-old simple instructions to survive school…

*Because?surviving school?is about more than just surviving algebra in 2022*

“Just play dead… If you ever hear gunshots: get on the ground, play dead, and cover yourself with blood so it looks like you’ve already been hit. Because the kids who play dead—well, those kids survive.”

I would have advised my daughter to jump out the window, but she reminded me her class is on the 4th floor so, ya know, that’s a no-go.

*deep breaths* *deep breaths* *deep breaths*

This?^^^ is what life has become in the U-S-of-gun-toting-A in 2022.?

It’s orange juice, pancakes, and casual conversation about how to save your child’s life during a school shooting.

It’s trying to normalize the horror of today’s day-to-day reality, but…

Let’s be real—

There’s?nothing?about this conversation that’s even close to normal.

• How are we living in a country where children find themselves trapped in a classroom war zone?
• How are we living in a place where brutality, hate, racism, and misogyny are normalized?
• How are we living in a country where there are more guns than people (as highlighted in the attached image via?The New York Times)?

Since the shooting in Uvalde less than 10 days ago, there’s been 16 mass shootings in the U.S. over Memorial Day weekend alone.

Sixteen!

The survivors (and we’re all survivors) are left choking on ALL the emotions, including my new emotional bestie, Rage. <—?She’s lovely… and absolutely pissed.

Me? I’m trying to channel my rage into action… by donating, protesting, speaking up, voting, but it doesn’t feel even close to enough. It’s?not?enough for those families who lost their children and loved ones.

And waiting for another child to be murdered before we do something is not an option.

Because when you’re a parent, every child could be your child. A massacre of 19 is a massacre of them all.

And if children are not safe in school, they are not safe anywhere.

Our children are NOT safe. None of us are.

Equally terrifying is the feeling that we’re powerless to prevent this from happening again.

That we’re doomed to repeat this pattern because we’re already too far gone.

And everyone who can do something about it prioritizes their power over the will of the people.

Even though the majority of Americans are in favor of background checks and passing gun legislation.

It does not feel okay that we’re just waiting for this to happen again.

And like so many issues, it feels too big a challenge to tackle in isolation.

So the question I keep asking myself is…

How do we change this broken country we live in?

(Seriously, if you have ideas, let me know. Let’s brainstorm together and figure this out.)

—

While changing the world with our individual actions often feels futile, or naive…

There’s a sense of control that stems from positive momentum. If we’re deliberately doing?something,?we don’t feel as stuck.

So until I can create a United States that has less guns than people...

Taking personal responsibility for my actions feels like a good place to start.

And even for the big issues, I’ve given myself permission to start small—building tiny habits that make a difference in my life.

Right now, that looks like starting every day with a clean slate and declaring?“Today’s going to be a wonderful day!”?as soon as my feet hit the ground in the morning.

I know, I know—it sounds cheesy, but it works for me.

(^^^ This habit is inspired by BJ Fogg’s “Maui Habit” and has been a great way to start the day feeling grounded, grateful, and like?anything?is possible—even when you’re feeling down.)

“Starting small” also looks like spending time sitting in the quiet every morning at 5am—reading, drinking tea, and stretching—before?sitting down to do the work of the day.

It also looks like?not?beating myself up if I can’t wake up at 5am because life happens.

This also looks like me doing what it takes to grow, on my own.

Because if I’m growing, so is my ability to do better. And eventually, hopefully, my ability to do?more.

—

When we commit to our own growth, we create the versions of ourselves that feel more capable of navigating—and solving—the problems we feel so powerless against.

It’s comforting to recognize that being responsible for our intentional (and imperfect) steps forward helps us move toward world-changing shifts.

So here’s my reminder to myself (and possibly you, if you need it):

When the world feels its heaviest, most chaotic, and most emotionally exhausting…

It’s NOT selfish to focus on yourself. And if you do it right, it’s worth celebrating.

Because that’s how you energize yourself to engage, fight the good fight, organize for gun legislation, and cause a ruckus.

So if you’re ready to let our good friend, Rage, take the lead and cause a ruckus, let me know in the comments below.

BTW - I have no idea what?causing a ruckus?looks like for us, but we can figure it out together, okay?

To fighting for our children and each other…

One tiny habit at a time,

Kira