OPTIMIZING OUR SURROUNDINGS, Part 5 of 6, Edition #15
Last week we discussed how to shift the focus to how we can help people around us become allies in our new healthy story. This week, we discuss how to avoid traps and how the four stages of learning the habits of health allows us to take full authorship of our health and lives and for us to become the dominant force in our lives.
One of the key areas we have to work on is family members, friends and others creating scenarios that are well-intended but put us in a position that would create behavior that is not supportive of our new path and story.
We all know about that well-meaning grandmother that makes our favorite pie and expects us to eat everything we're served. It is important to use our new skills here to address a potential relationship issue if we say 'No'. Remember, the offering is the other person's expression of love or gift to us and they may not have the same mindset as we do.
The best thing we can do is politely explain why we are choosing not to eat the pie. A big hug, an "I appreciate you" and an "I love you", if appropriate. We can even share why from Element 1 "Being Clear Why We are Here", which explains all the important reasons we are making these changes. They should want to become your ally in this area…
Places.
The environment around us shapes our daily behavior. Support can come from many different places, such as personal coach, a larger group of like-minded folks, or even as a self-help individual. We all learn in different ways, but there are some important catalysts to enhance our ability to master new habits. Learning and practicing are important (it takes about 10,000 hours to achieve mastery of a particular action.) This is best accomplished by using accurate mindfulness, feedback, coaching and deliberate practice. And, deliberate practice makes all the difference.
Here is the progression from unconscious-incompetence to unconscious-competence:?
Stage One: Unconscious Incompetent
This is our starting point. We may have some ideas about how to transform a particular habit of health, but it is usually incomplete. We've also not shown any ability to consistently perform a certain skill or behavior.
Stage Two: Conscious Incompetent
This article series, based on the Habits of Health by Dr. Wayne S. Andersen, and through feedback from others, we are now aware of what we need to accomplish the skill or habit.
Stage Three: Conscious Competent
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Through applying the installation tools, using a life-book journal and having the support of a coach or some other form of assistance, we are learning and repeating new skills and habits which are transforming our behavior in effective ways.
Stage Four: Unconscious Competent
This is the point where the skill, ability or habit is fully installed and we do without thinking. We are transforming behaviors to create and support optimal health and well-being so we reach our goals and it last a lifetime.
This is the goal of the Habits of Health Transformational System: To allow us to take full authorship of our health and life and for us to become the dominant force in our lives.
The Habits of Health Transformational System is designed to move us forward through the four stages in a logical fashion.
Support could come from role models who exemplify optimal health or well-being, or we can recruit a friend to join us in this new path to health.
Having like-minded people around us is a powerful motivator.
Help can come from formal settings like behavioral groups, medical facilities, wellness programs, commercial programs that involve group meetings and from online communities.
In addition, we will start noticing that there are others things which increase our tendency to make unhealthy or healthy choices.
Here are some good questions to ask ourselves, frequently: What is my Kryptonite? What people, places, or things have the tendency to throw us off?
Next week, we will wrap up OPTIMIZING OUR SURROUNDINGS with some helpful tips on dealing with digital devices!
Meanwhile, #stayhealthymyfriends