The opiate epidemic strikes home, again

I had the sad task of delivering my younger brother’s eulogy this past weekend. I would not normally share the below on LinkedIn, but am making an exception in the hopes of sparing other families this pain. Below is an excerpt.

"This is a particularly hard talk to give. I stood in front of many of you 6 years ago to deliver a eulogy for my younger sister. They were connected in life as siblings. Their deaths, 6 years and the length of the United States apart, is connected by a terrible thread that is affecting much of our country. It is with great sadness but no shame that I share with you that my brother died from an accidental overdose of opiates, in this case fentanyl. My younger sister did not die of an overdose, but opiates are what brought her to that road that morning where she was hit by a car. Opiates had caused her homelessness, addiction and separation from family, in particular her sons. I will mourn both of them and what they could have offered to all of us if they had but lived, for the rest of my life.

The issue of opiates and addiction in this country is getting worse and we must turn a corner. The year my sister died, about 40,000 Americans died from overdoses. Last year is was 80,000 and we appear on track for another record this year. The city where my brother lived experienced another sad death the weekend of his death when a 14 year old boy took a percocet that had been spiked with fentanyl. The father had to be told by the EMT 3 times that his son was dead before he collapsed in tears. In the same city, a doctor reported this summer that they had treated 354 overdose cases in the emergency room since the beginning of the year. Of course this only counts those that made it to the hospital. And these are just the deaths and overdoses that I am mentioning. This epidemic, and it is an epidemic, is causing untold costs and suffering across the United States. This is not just affecting the homeless that you may see on the way to work, it is affecting every demographic and age, and we must turn it around.

I'm not sure what the combination of efforts and policies may do that but I do know that all of us can do something.

The first is to be aware. Be aware that we are all at risk given how little of fentanyl can cause an overdose. Be aware that more and more drugs have fentanyl in them. Be aware of the signs of overdose and be ready to act. Be aware that the drug is both highly dangerous and highly addictive- even taking it 1 time can send someone down a path no one should trod.

The second is transparency. I am sharing my families battle with this epidemic in the hopes that it can prevent another parent from burying their child. In March of this year, my father was awoken in the middle of the night to find EMTs and police in his house. Because of HIPA, they would not tell him what was going on in order to protect patient confidentiality. In the morning my brother explained that the woman visiting with him was having an issue and it was no big deal. In truth, my brother had suffered an overdose and only survived because his visitor had been transparent and called emergency services for assistance.

There was no one there to save him when it happened again this summer.

After his death we also found out that some within his orbit, and known to the rest of the family, were aware of his issues. Rather than being direct and letting us know, they only alluded to the problems when speaking with my father, causing us to miss the opportunity to intervene. They did this in a bid to not have an uncomfortable conversation or "get him into trouble." This epidemic does not have time for such niceties.

I am both angry and deeply sad about both of my siblings deaths. Please heed this message, protect your loved ones and seek to make people aware. I hope we as a country can emerge from this soon. Thank you"