Openness to Coaching: A Framework to Consider

Last fall, I was fortunate enough to visit Barcelona, Spain. After I returned, reflecting on the gorgeous diversity of the people I saw and interacted with, I was even more committed to a guiding principle for my life and professional work:

People across the world, in any nation or culture, of any race, creed, political belief, etc., basically want the same two things: 1. To be happier and suffer less, and 2. To be empowered to make meaningful contributions to the world around them.

As fellow human beings, we’re far more connected than separate. And once a critical mass of us builds muscle memory around getting to know those who are “different,” and subsequently evolves our mindsets and choices, we might finally begin to catch a glimpse of equitable flourishing.

Several years in the making

I've noticed that I tend to flourish the most when I apply some kind of deliberate yet flexible approach to big challenges. Across my life, I've gravitated toward systems, models, or "frameworks" that have helped me get my arms around ideas, content, or processes that are new to me. Once I internalize these structures, I tend to make them my own.

It’s been exactly seven years since I published the most current version of my book The 4 Spheres of Intentional Living, which offers work-life strategies and action steps organized within a framework of the "spheres" themselves: “Physical,” “Intellectual,” “Emotional,” and “Spiritual.”

The world has changed a lot since then and I have as well. I’ve loved and I’ve lost. I’ve listened more fully to persons who are different from me in visible and invisible ways. And in just the past six months, I’ve transitioned from more than 30 years of internal corporate roles to fully launching my own coaching practice.

In the context of these changes, experiences, interactions with others, ongoing learning, and in-depth research, I’ve gradually pieced together a new framework—depicted in this visual—that delineates the systematic yet fluid approach I bring to my work and my clients, all of whom I certainly want to flourish as much as possible.

Complex and nuanced problems

The framework can be “started” at any place in the visual but offers the most value when a person considers a “complex and nuanced problem” they’re facing that is potentially hindering them or others from flourishing. A couple of definitions:

Complex = consisting of many different and connected parts.

Nuanced = characterized by subtle shades of meaning or expression.

My inspiration for the term “complex and nuanced problems” was the work of the late mathematician and designer Horst Rittel. Rittel coined the term “wicked problem” to describe a situation that lacks a “final” solution and necessitates less of a scientific approach than creative strategies in the context of embracing ambiguity.

Rittel asserted that wicked problems bear incomplete or inconsistent knowledge; involve large numbers of people and viewpoints; present specific and significant economic burdens; and not only interconnect with other problems but are often symptoms of other problems. Furthermore, Rittel believed that "design thinking" was one of the more effective ways to tackle such problems.

Each person will have their own list and priorities regarding the problems they deem most important. These are the ones that are top of mind for me, and which are (or will be) showing up in the content I create and share:

• AI + Converging and Exponential Technology (such as Augmented and Virtual Reality, Internet of Things, data processing, robotics, drones, etc.)—including how we can better collaborate with AI.
• Business and Career Sustainability (amid nonstop change).
• Industrial Complexes (when a specific industry and its proponents or lobbyists become fully enmeshed in social and political systems at local, state, and federal levels; in most cases, industry insiders profit at the expense of outsiders and society in general).
• Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DE&I).
• Disease (in particular, those for which a cure continues to elude us such as many forms of cancer and dementia).
• Guns (the status quo—ongoing mass shootings followed by unproductive political discourse—must give way to collaborative solutions that bridge our differences).
• Ecological Stewardship (if we can ever achieve a critical mass of agreement on the scientific facts themselves, we might begin to make headway on this problem).
• Weapons of Mass Destruction (WMDs), including nuclear weapons.
• Terrorism (acts of terrorism themselves can often be viewed in terms of “right and wrong,” but the dynamics and personalities below the surface are seldom clear-cut).
• War (it’s always happening somewhere in the world and the participants’ motives are seldom fully captured by sound bytes).
• Democracy (how do we both protect it AND make it work better for all of us?).
• Impermanence (everyone and everything ends; how, then, shall we live?).
• Existentialism (a term often misused; existentialism, when properly understood, is the "philosophical belief we are each?responsible for creating purpose or meaning in our own lives").
• Meaning (even if we insist that life itself has some kind of inherent meaning, on a day to day basis we each tend to make our own).

Less openness to coaching

As each of us confronts (willingly or unwillingly) a specific complex and nuanced problem, a real-time “mindset” is revealed. Although our mindsets usually exist along a continuum, and aren’t always in the same place on this continuum from one moment to another, in general we are typically leaning toward being either:

1. Less open to coaching, or
2. More open to coaching

When we are less open to coaching, we tend to struggle with a degree of lack of curiosity. And the greater this deficit, the more likely each of us is to have fixed or rigid beliefs. Such rigidity sets the stage for a likely wrestling match with cognitive dissonance, which is the state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes, especially as relating to behavioral decisions and attitude change.

More importantly—and sometimes with negative consequences for ourselves or others—these tendencies enable “groupthink,” which discourages creativity or individual responsibility, and intolerance toward others whose ideas, values, or experiences differ from ours.

Absent or uneven leadership

When an individual (with a “title” or no title) brings these factors into positions of leadership or influence, they are more likely to demonstrate absent or (at best) uneven or unreliable leadership. Such a leader and their team are more prone to a lack of clarity about what they want or need to achieve in the context of the complex and nuanced problem. The primary culprit in most cases? The leader isn’t guiding them to fully consider the situation from multiple angles or viewpoints, leaving many of the best ideas and potential breakthroughs untouched.

When a work group has a lack of clarity on the challenge they’re trying to solve and how to solve it, there's less alignment on what to do next. In this quagmire, trust is more likely to be eroded since the team will consciously or subconsciously have a lack of faith in the leader’s abilities to unite everyone and drive them toward results.

And where trust is lacking, motivation is also lacking. And without consistent motivation, there’s a dearth of impactful action steps.

The ultimate impact of a tendency toward being less open to coaching that enables “absent or uneven leadership?” The complex and wicked problems we’re facing don’t improve and usually get worse. The people most impacted by the problem are less likely to flourish.

More openness to coaching

Conversely, when a person’s mindset is more open to coaching, they are more likely to exhibit some degree of mindfulness, which is the practice of giving full attention to what’s happening within and around you, without judging yourself or others. Mindfulness enables emotional intelligence, which is an enhanced and practiced ability to perceive, evaluate, express, and control emotions.

Building upon this foundation of higher self-awareness and empathy, an individual is more apt to push themselves to embrace learning agility—which is the practice of regularly seeking new experiences, applying feedback, and reflecting on lessons learned, to keep growing professionally and personally. They're less afraid of change and uncomfortable situations and often seek them out.

This self-awareness, empathy, and learning agility fosters more effective relationships and, in the context of this constant growth and positive interactions with others, each of us can more fully and confidently laser-focus on skills we want to continue to build.

Skills that increase our odds of flourishing amid finding meaningful and sustainable work.

Authentic human leadership

When others observe this type of mindset in an individual, the person is likely to be viewed as demonstrating authentic human leadership. Day over day, such a remarkable person tends to embody:

• A propensity to both coach others and be coached by others.
• Effective use of storytelling, which ultimately helps others to understand who the leader is, what's important to them, and what they're asking people to do.
• An ongoing demonstration of “immersive empathy,” whereby the leader is proactively seeing the world through another person’s eyes and on their turf.
• Ongoing, give-and-take dialogue, which enables the leader and the people they lead or influence to begin to identify and align on those complexities and nuances of a problem.
• A penchant for the aforementioned "design thinking," which is described in this McKinsey article as "design thinking is "a methodology that we use to?solve complex problems" and "a way of using systemic reasoning and intuition to explore ideal future states.”

The frequent outcome of authentic human leadership? Complex and nuanced problems begin to improve. People begin to more fully flourish.

Let's keep it real. These problems seldom “go away completely." But the focus should be less on total eradication and more on, “How do I make this situation a little better today than it was yesterday?”

Let’s connect

I’m an ICF and Hogan certified coach, equipping professionals to develop their authentic human leadership capabilities in the age of AI. My customers are internal HR or L&D professionals seeking coaching for their business clients, as well as business leaders looking to connect directly with a coach for themselves or their team members. Use this link to schedule a call with me to discuss potential coaching services. You can also email me ([email protected]) or message me here on LinkedIn.