An Open Letter to my Therapist

After decades of avoiding a past I wished I could forget, I’ve finally found a little peace, thanks to the skill and patience of someone I never knew I needed. I truly believe he will never fully understand how grateful I am, or how much those fifty-minute conversations have shaped my life.

To my therapist,

Thank you for changing my life. For guiding me in understanding my past and patiently walking alongside me on this journey. You opened doors and waited for me to be ready to step through them.

I know that everything I achieve from here on will be possible because of you—because of your skill in navigating complex and difficult conversations, and the tools you equipped me with and taught me to use. For the times you patiently sat while my heart shattered in front of you, and for the care with which you slowly gathered the pieces and helped me put them back together.

For every time I failed to speak, and you sat in silence, creating the space to simply be. You gave me the courage to slowly peel back the layers of fear and pain, allowing memories to unfurl in front of me, to be laid bare.

For never judging me. For never suggesting that the things I carried were shameful or trivial. You allowed each worry, big or small, to be brought to the table for your expert curiosity to untangle the chaos. For helping to unravel the tightly knit yarn of confusion and craft a new design.

When I couldn’t find the words, you offered me questions that uncovered the history lodged like tar in my throat. You loosened the restraints that held tightly in my core every memory I wished I could forget.

Thank you for helping me understand that my desire to detach, escape, and avoid was what trapped me. You showed me that the power I unknowingly gave to those who failed me was allowing them to win again.

When I lost all perspective, you adjusted my point of view. Gently and subtly, you broadened my perspective and helped me to see anew.

No amount of time will ever give me more answers, direction, and hope than I have found through your guidance.

I may not venture into the world perfect or ‘cured’, but I am a better person, a more capable person, and a happier person because you took the time to walk with me. You walked with me down a path I thought I would only ever travel alone.

Though words may never fully capture the depth of my gratitude, I hope that one day you will know that I carry your kindness and wisdom with me, always.