OPEN LETTER TO MEGHAN MARKEL Should you leave racist UK?

Dear Meghan

I wanted to write this letter to you to apologise to you for the not-so royal treatment you have received from pockets of the British public and media.

There really isn’t any excuse for the bile you have had to read and listen to, however I’m writing this letter in the hope that you may read it and be given something far deeper to ponder. And this in turn, I hope may help you question your royal role in today’s Britain.

I don’t aim to justify or excuse the quite obvious racism, discrimination and stereotyping you have witnessed. But I do hope I can at least help you understand some of the subtleties as to WHY pockets of the British public and media find it difficult to accept your olive skin.

Firstly, I write to you from the perspective of a British minority, born and raised in the UK. I also write to you as a Mother and entrepreneur who also decided to leave UK and raise her children in a different country and environment. I also write to you as a Brit who despite leaving her home country, still loves her motherland.

What the h*ll is going on in the UK?

To non-Brits, the UK situation appears perplexing:

“Why is the UK public so divided?”

“Why did Brexit happen?”

“Why was the elitist overtly racist Boris voted into power?”

I have heard so many questions like this recently that I’d like to simplify it for you Meghan and others.

The UK is racist

Yes, at a gut level my motherland is a deeply racist society, with a rigid class system to match.

‘You can’t generalise an entire country’, shout the keyboard warriors (who are probably white, and probably not racist hence the offense taken).

But please bear with me as I explain my opinion further.

Racist Britain

How do I know my beloved UK is largely a racist country? That’s easy I’m Indian and was born and raised in the pitiful old colonial master’s belly. I’ve walked the soil, breathed the air, been taught in their schools and eaten their food. I’m British through and through. I’m also Indian. And I know the struggle of an ethnic minority in a largely racist society.

Since birth, all my senses have witnessed the quite obvious racism. It’s not really hidden from view. Indeed like many other people of ‘exotic DNA’ (as Rachel Johnson referred to you in her article for The Mail on Sunday), I had become rather desensitized to the racism. Us ethnic minorities simply learned to co-exist with it.

White-noise

When you numb yourself to racism and create filters that allow you to ignore the ‘Paki go home graffiti’ you adapt and the racism and discrimination literally becomes white noise (no pun intended).

You see Meghan, white noise is exactly what you have been hearing in the press when they slandered your name and spoke about your mum’s dreadlocks, and all the countless other offensive crap that’s been written about your black heritage.

Now you and I (and every other person with a shade of skin between black and brown) don’t give two hoots about what hair-do your mother is rocking, but you see the largely caucasian British society does.

Stats

According to the Office for National Statistics (https://www.irr.org.uk/research/statistics/ethnicity-and-religion/ ) there were approximately 64.6 million people living in the UK in mid-2014. Of these, 56.2 million (87.2 per cent) were White British. Now idea when they will do a re-count, but the numbers won’t shift that much. 

On their website, they state the most recent Census in 2011 highlighted that in England and Wales, 80 per cent of the population were white British.

Asian (Pakistani, Indian, Bangladeshi, other) ‘groups’ made up 6.8 per cent of the population, black groups 3.4 per cent, Chinese groups 0.7 cent, Arab groups 0.4 per cent and other groups 0.6 per cent.

In London in 2011, 45 per cent (3.7 million) of 8.2 million usual residents were White British. So London really is diaspora of mixed ethnicities and the racial hatred seen outside of London is more obvious. 

However, that’s not to say Londoners don’t experience racism, it’s just the numbers are spread between ethnicities. There’s not so much of an ‘obvious’ David v’s Goliath situation going on in London.

According to Index Mundi (https://www.indexmundi.com/united_kingdom/demographics_profile.html), the UK demographics (give or take) looks something like this:

White 87.2%

Black/African/Caribbean/black British 3%,

Asian/Asian British: Indian 2.3%

Asian/Asian British: Pakistani 1.9%

Mixed 2%

Other 3.7%

Now the official government updated 2020 stats may differ ever so slightly with the above %, but I think it’s fair to accept and expect that the large majority of UK is and will remain white.

And that in itself is not the issue here Meghan. Every country has it’s unique blend of majorities and minorities. It’s the relationship between the two that concerns me. 

Now Meghan although this letter is addressed to you, I appreciate some white folk may be reading this article and getting all huffety-puffety. So before I hit their ‘offended’ button, I’d like to say 3 things:

1. Calm your farm, I’m not anti-white. I’m anti-hate and pro-acceptance. So chill and accept that people of colour have a voice and experiences that must be heard. Even if you find it uncomfortable to read.
2. You may ‘think’ you’re not outwardly racist, but the issue with racism is not necessarily obvious. Much of the discrimination is ingrained in the subconscious and thus occurs in subtlety. Just cause you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not there. Can you ‘see’ the air you breathe? I rest my case. 
3. No, I’m not alluding to ALL white folk being inherently racist (let’s not be silly), what I am saying is that if 87% of the population are white, statistically the larger racist pockets by numbers, must reside within the white community, and not the black/asian communities. Us ethnic minorities just don’t have the numbers my friend.

Quick maths

Let’s do the maths, using the stats above as our data point (and yes we can even allow for a margin of error, if that makes you feel more comfortable). 

Let’s say all the Black/Asian/Mixed/Other ethnic minorities suddenly decided to wake up and become racist towards the white community. You would have a combined % of circa 13% of the non-white population up against 87% whites.

Ants

Let’s use a nice analogy to explain this. Ants.

There are circa 12k different species of ants in the world. Let’s say 2 of these species (lets call them red ants and black ants for ease of visualisation) decided to have a fight one day.

Now let’s assume both the red ants and black ants don’t hold any physical nor proprietary advantage of the other as individuals. But let’s say they just decided to have an ant fight one day because they hate the color of one another’s legs.

So on one side you have 87 red ants (representing the 87% British whites), and on the other side you had 13 black ants (representing the rest of the combined ethnic minorities). Statistically speaking who has the advantage? 

Statistically the black ants (representing the ethnic minorities) don’t stand a massive chance against the red ants (representing the white majority ants) 

Even if the ethnic majority ants are bigger than the white-majority ants on a one on one basis. They will still get crushed, because they are acutely outnumbered.

Crickets

Let’s change it to chirping crickets.

87 chirping crickets decided to chirp a song. Do you think the 13 crickets singing a different tune can be heard? Of course not, the voices of the 13 crickets is drowned out. No-one listens.

Sometimes one of the ambitious 13 crickets manages to find a silent gap to chirp louder (usually when the 87 crickets are taking a breather). The ambitious 1 cricket tells the 87 crickets the woes of all the 13 crickets, and how their song should also be heard.

The ambitious cricket writes to the papers, is televised, spreads the word on social media etc. The remaining 12 crickets also chime in at varying stages, all united in their anti-racism song. 

And then what happens? 

The 87 crickets start singing again and drowning out the voices of the 13 crickets.

The brave whites

Now among the 87 crickets and the 87 red ants, there are some crickets and ants that see and notice the plight of their minority 13 buggy friends. Some of them even try to voice out in support.

The super brave ones step out of line and the security of their better equipped majority group. And they ‘defect’ to the other side. This usually prompts dismay, resentments, further insults and shaming.

This dear Meghan is what Prince Harry faces now. 

Prince Harry has in effect ‘defected to the dark side’.

However you and I, and Prince Harry know that this is utter BS. No body has defected anywhere. The apparent defection by Prince Harry is just amazing bait for the British media to now have months worth of content to sell and spew their bile over the gullible Brits to help shift their papers. Ching ching all the way to the banks.

Your decision to step back from royal duties has made the British media a lot of money. And I’m sure they will have a bumper year on the back of your news, and hit all their KPI’s.

As in war, there’s money in blame and shame

You are already used to how the British media churn shit. So I’m sure you are probably getting mentally ready for the ongoing campaign of blame and shame that is coming your way.

Isn’t it ironic, that the hateful headlines sell at all stages of their hate-lifecycle. The hateful headlines about you sell. Then the ongoing character assassination sells. Then will come the shaming and blaming headlines:

 ‘Meghan swipes away our Prince’ and ‘Megan fractures our royal family’ all these headline will also sell.

And you lovely Meghan will be the vilified villain in all of this. My hope is that Queen Elizabeth doesn’t suffer any health complaints this year, as I’m sure the British media will pin that one on you too 

‘Meghan killed Queen Elizabeth’

Anyway I digress. Meghan, in my experience I’ve come across different types of white folks in my country. I can summarize them into 5 x types. It’s a pretty crass and crude way to generalise, but I’m trying to simplify things here for you and the other non-Brits reading this.

Type 1- The non-racists — They respect all races, ethnicities and religions. My white friends fall into this category.

Type 2- The closet racists- Colour loving/liking on the outside, the opposite on the inside- They are the dangerous ones.

Type 3- The racists- They are easy to spot so let’s be thankful.

Type 4- The ignorant racist- They don’t even know they harbor racist views and programming, they are utterly oblivious. They don’t usually mean any harm. In fact, they may even have token ethnic minority friends. They just lack the sensitivity and awareness around the ethnic struggle and do little to advance their knowledge.

Think Danny Baker who referred to your son Archie as a Chimpanzee, and was subsequently fired by the BBC. Based on his tweets, he’s clearly clueless.

Type 5- The justified racist. They harbor racist views but don’t believe it’s a big deal. They may even have ‘friends’ of colour’ or at least they say they do……..but those friends don’t usually get invited home for a tea and biscuit.

Confusion amongst the ranks

So aside from type 1 and 3 (who are clear on their beliefs) the remaining types can cause confusion, when it comes to forming friendships and understanding their belief system.

Now here’s the thing, the above classification system can actually be applied to any ethnicity in any country. It’s a universal thing. You get the same division types amongst the British Indians, Pakistanis and Blacks for example. 

However there are 2 fundamental differences:

One, since the people of color are in the minority, the numbers really don’t stack up. For example (back to the ant story), If there were 13 ants in the start, and now we divide those 13 ants into the above 5 x types of viewpoints, then the ones who are type 2,3,4 and 5 (those with some level of in-built racism known to them or unknown to them) are fewer and further between.

Or put another way, let’s just say there aren’t enough utterly racist black ants making a noise and spewing hate in the UK. 

And for anyone that is, I’m sure the British media would pump and exploit the propaganda to fuel even more hate. This is exactly how the whole anti-muslim sentiment in the UK is fired up. This is exactly the game the media played when it came to voting for Brexit. It’s a well-oiled media strategy and the majority of the British public are played over and over again.

Secondly, ethnic minorities know and understand the struggle. Hence they find solace within their communities, and form pockets of unity within divided cities. Whilst I’m all for integration (just look at how Singapore manages it’s melange of ethnic minorities without racial tensions), I can understand why and how the pockets of unity develop.

So what’s your point?

Meghan I’m sure there are others reading this letter who are thinking:

‘But what about those terrorists?’

‘What about the evil suicide bombers?’

I’m not going to give that BS much word-space in this letter to you, since none of the top 10 leading causes of death in the UK are down to terrorism. 

The biggest terrorist in the UK is the food industry which can be held responsible for much of the top 5 reasons for death in the UK.

White noise

As for me Meghan, I always lived and schooled amongst the white population. There was me and one other black girl in my school year. The rest were white. 

I have learned how to adapt and blend, however my strategy (and most other ethnic minorities strategy) was to cut out the ‘white noise’.

Meaning we learned to ignore racism and live with it, cause it ‘ain’t goin nowhere’.

Sometimes of course the racism is ugly and can’t be ignored especially when it becomes violent, which I’ve been on the receiving end of too(that’s another article for another day). 

Ignore the white noise

However, the way to survive and thrive as an ethnic minority in racist UK is to ignore the white-noise.

Literally ignore the WHITE-NOISE.

Meghan whilst you are being publicly and privately vilified, and whilst you’ve supposedly popped a bee in the royal soldier’s fluffy bonnets, you probably won’t be on the receiving end of racial violence like so many people experience in the UK on a daily basis. For this, count yourself lucky.

Yeah so what’s the point again?

At this point in this letter, I feel I should tell you why I’m writing this.

Meghan at a surface level I get that you are hurt and are fleeing and retreating to keep you and your family safe. This makes complete sense. I have x 2 kids and I’m also residing outside of UK now. However I left for different reasons.

I have often wondered if I’d like to return to Blighty and raise my kids in the UK. And I must say at this stage I’m pretty put off by the prospect. For one, I firmly believe the future is Asian, and my kids have a better prospect living in Asia, learning Mandarin and integrating with Asian nationalities in this region.

Petty politics

Whilst the UK implodes, clever China (the masterful chess player) silently buys and builds up global resources, minerals, ports, land, transport hubs etc. The UK’s dominance is well and truly over. And it’s petty politics is embarrassing for Brits at home and abroad.

The UK has long lost its shiny appeal, and even more so as it prepares to lose its outlier popular Prince.

But still I don’t hate my country Meghan. I still call it home and I still love it. I still believe the UK is one of the most creative and entrepreneurial societies in the world and will reinvent itself post-Brexit. 

Such is the circle of life, and the UK will be sure to revive it’s post-Brexit fracture. I’m sure Britain will become an attractive place for investments and trade once it’s gone through some pain first, and received a firm slap in its face.

A karmic slap for all it’s historical atrocities

But will it become an attractive place to reside? Will it become unified and harmonious? Will there ever be a respectful culture grounded in love before hate? My guess is no. It’s just not part of the UK’s DNA.

UK DNA

The old colonial masters are used to having their way. They are used to bossing around other countries and pillaging wealth and resources at the cost of human capital. This is UK’s heritage. This is the British legacy.

The whole colonial strategy was based on white supremacy. The senior white officials and leaders were very creative when it came to slave trade underpinned with racist ideologies that kept the machine readily oiled.

They cared little for the aftermath and trail of destruction they left behind them, having conquered the majority of this world. To see what I mean, just look at the state of relations between India and Pakistan. The Brits divided India and created two warring nations (because it served them to have India and Pakistan at one another’s throats). And then they left the two countries to fight it out, till this day.

Gandhi was fiercely opposed to the partition of India, but the Brits did it anyway. And what’s left today? Two nuclear-armed egotistical countries fighting over who has the bigger balls to fire.

I’m sorry to say Meghan, In my British motherland race and privilege are directly correlated. 

And you have experienced it first hand-within the royal walls, where it is at it’s most prevalent.

Thank you Meghan

So what has all this got to do with you Meghan? Well firstly I’d like to thank you. You see we kind of needed this to happen. 

We needed a courageous ethnic minority figure to voice out. And of course since you now reside within the royal hems of our society (where no doubt many type 2,3,4 and 5 white-groupings reside), you have access to the biggest, shiniest and most exclusive microphones and cameras in the world. 

All the lenses are on you Meghan

What I mean is, your actions and voice is being boomed over the UK and the world. Your voice and actions has an opportunity to be louder than the 87% white majority. You have suddenly got yourself into a position of power and influence that no other ethnic minority has managed.

Hey even the wealthy ethnic minority football players like Troy Deeney and the former Juventus star Eniola Aluko can’t eradicate racism in football, despite voicing out over it.

Money can’t wipe out racism

An opportunity

But you Meghan, you have a different opportunity here. I get you want to keep your family safe and your ears and eyes shielded from the stone-throwing. But my question to you is:

What worldly cause do you sincerely CARE about in the world?

I’m not asking you what your purpose is in life, as I find the whole ‘live your purpose’ brigade all too antagonistic and simple. I’m asking you what you CARE about. What issues make you angry? What issues make you cry? What issues get you riled?

What issues bigger than you, me, Archie, Prince Harry, Buckingham Palace do you seriously CARE about Meghan?

Meghan you have the world’s best cameras on you and a microphone in your hand. The entire world is watching and listening to you. I know you haven’t asked to be a ‘role model’ and you haven’t volunteered to represent ethnic minorities. But you are going through the all-too-common ethnic minority struggle in the UK.

My question to you Meghan is how can you do good out of this dire situation? I’m not saying you have to be the sacrificial lamb here, but can you spot a way to bring a magnifying glass on the realties of hate amongst a society? Can you bring about any change? Can you inspire a movement?

As a women I’m with you.

As a mother I understand you.

As a champion of female equality I get you.

As an ethnic minority I’m behind you.

Powerful question

A friend recently taught me to ask myself a really powerful question every time I’m in indecision, doubt, anger or frustration.

That question is:

What would love do?

I see the stance you and Prince Harry have taken is anchored in love towards one another, your son and families.

However is there another stance that needs to be considered when you consider wider humanity and the ethnic and female struggle? 

What do you need to say to the world about this? Is this a teaching opportunity? Can you bring down the % of type 2–5 of racist whites, by even 0.1% ? Can you do that Meghan?

If the answer is yes, then I hope you will try and do your bit. Retreating may give you the protection YOU need. But retreating will not protect humanity at large. 

Me-too

You have a great opportunity to create your own version of the ‘me-too’ movement, and get racial issues on global radars and manifestos.

All the world’s shiny advanced cameras and microphones are on you Meghan. I sincerely hope you will use them to create far bigger noise than the harping and chirping coming from the British press.

And as for all the bone china you have rattled within Buckingham Palace, remember it’s just white-noise.

All my love

Dee Allan

Written by Dee Allan-The Gritty Girl, International Speaker, Writer and Entrepreneur. Dee is launching Career Queenz www.careerqueenz.com a membership site for female entrepreneurs who are Mothers. She also runs an employment agency, blogs on the Medium platform, and lives in Singapore with her husband and non-racist cheeky kids.