An open letter to the class of 2020

On the 20th anniversary of my graduation from the University of Virginia, I reflect back on the defining moments and lessons that have made me the person I am today, both personally and professionally. To the class of 2020, you are entering adulthood in treacherous times and so much has undoubtedly already been taken from you. It will not be easy. I had every advantage possible when I graduated college and it was the most difficult time of my life. Without a pandemic.

I cannot even begin to imagine the struggles you will face, and neither can you. But I do not say this because I pity you and I don't say it to scare you. I say it to assure you that you will get through it, and how you get through it will define you. Most of us have no idea who we are when we graduate college. We've been guided by our parents, our friends, and our teachers and haven't had to make difficult decisions on our own.

In college, it was easy to know our place in society. We had roommates, clubs, sports teams, fraternities, sororities, and other groups we associated ourselves with. Pick a major, a club, and a social circle - BOOM - you have a social identity. It's also easy to know what we are working towards: graduation. Want to meet a significant other? There is no shortage of parties or club gatherings in which to do so.

Without that framework and structure in place, it's easy to feel lost. While the first months after graduation may feel celebratory and liberating, it's not long before we begin to wonder, who are we now? Who are we without our academic pursuits, our sports teams, and our close knit circle of friends? How will we know if we are successful without exams and grades?

The good new is, all of that is still out there. It's just not as easy to find. This is a good thing! Forging your own path and figuring out what truly makes you happy will lead to places you could have never imagined. If someone would have told me 20 years ago that I would be the chief marketing officer at a technology company, 26-time marathon finisher, published author and social media influencer, I would never have believed it. I was an unemployed, lonely and depressed 21-year-old whose only sense of self was her discipline to go to the gym every day. I believed in myself, but I also had no idea how to find a way out of my current situation.

So how did I arrive at my current place in life? Not easily. There was quite a bit of hardship along the way, both personally and professionally. In order to better my situation and become a happy, high-functioning member of society, I had to learn these key lessons:

It's not what you accomplish, it's how you accomplish it.

Your job title and professional successes don't carry nearly as much weight as how you pursued them. Were you focused? Disciplined? Ethical? Creative? Passionate? What was it about YOU that led to the success? Challenge yourself to value those attributes in yourself far more than you value your job title or the salary you earn. This is the key to confidence and self-esteem. Truly understanding your core values, bringing them to everything you do, and loving yourself for that.

Get uncomfortable, and embrace it.

If you want to grow, you have to push yourself beyond your comfort zone. You cannot always take the easy and familiar path. I'll use a running analogy to illustrate this one. For years, I would always avoid hills whenever I ran. I wouldn't sign up for hilly races and I would run the flattest routes I could find near my house. Why? Because hills would force me to slow down and I didn't want to feel slow.

That was entirely the wrong approach because the people who regularly run over hills are stronger and faster in races. Even if the races are flat! No matter what you are trying to accomplish, seek out those difficult, uncomfortable challenges. They might slow you down, but you'll be stronger in the long run.

Your major doesn't determine your career path.

I majored in English and was often asked if I planned to become a teacher. This bothered me not because I have anything against teachers, but because so many people believed that my English major provided only one career path. I chose English because I loved to write, and I knew that no matter what career I ended up with, it would involve writing.

20 years later, nobody cares what I majored in. Employers care about your attitude and your experience. Maybe you discovered over the past four years that you don't actually like the subject you majored in. Maybe you do like what you majored in but you don't see an obvious career path. Anything is possible. No decisions are final and you can pursue any career path you'd like.

I've interviewed over 100 candidates throughout my career and the majority of them did not major in marketing. I've hired art history majors, fine arts majors, computer science majors, hospitality majors. I'm interested in why a candidate chose a particular major and why they have an interest in marketing. I do not discount anyone based on their major.

You may have to take a first job that doesn't align with your career aspirations. Embrace it. Do not spend your time wishing you had a different job and instead learn everything you possibly can from that experience. Your goals and dreams do not have an expiration date.

Be weird.

I've always been a little "odd," but I usually hid that part of myself from others, especially in professional settings, in order to be socially accepted. In social and professional settings, I did my best to conform to how others were acting and I tried to be the "perfect employee." This made me a rather boring and uptight person. I hid my sense of humor and all the quirks that made me unique. I didn't know how to let loose and just be myself because I was too focused on pleasing other people and getting them to think favorably of me. That was the goal: gain the approval of others.

It's only been within the past 5 years that I realized that if I'm confident in who I am (see the first lesson) then it doesn't matter what others think. And ironically, I think more people like me now that I am more relaxed and genuine than when I was trying so hard to gain approval.

Class of 2020, I do not envy the conditions under which you are beginning your adult life. Some experts have argued that you will forever be at a disadvantage. I challenge them. I think that just the opposite can be true. While this pandemic is unprecedented, there will always be obstacles. You have the unique opportunity to learn to overcome them early in your career. 10 years from now, you may be much wiser, stronger, and happier than those who graduated before or after you. The choice is yours.

Sincerely,

Elizabeth