Open Doors

At Hilton, we’ve created The Check-In – a series that shares perspectives on issues and insights that shape the human experience at work. This month, I wanted to share a piece I previously wrote about the transition of dropping off my youngest son at university, which stirred a mix of emotions and reflections on family dynamics. As I navigated this shift, I found solace in reframing the “empty nest” concept into the more positive “open door” stage, emphasizing hospitality and the opportunities for connection that lie ahead.

A few weeks ago, I dropped off my youngest son in his first-year university dorm, effectively marking the beginning of a new chapter for my family. Emotions were strong (for me) as I took those last photos of my baby walking away. As a lifelong nerd, I had spent the months leading up to this reading, talking to friends (a colleague recently joked, “Is this STILL going on, it feels like you’ve been talking about it for months!”), and generally fretting over the pros and cons of what life would become.?

In those months of research, one of the most helpful cognitive reframes I came across was a new label for this chapter – because “empty nest” sounds so, well, EMPTY. I discovered the concept of the “open door” stage – with a focus on hospitality, comings and goings, and a return to homebase to recharge. This idea made me think of the often touted “open door policy” at work and constructive ways of bringing this intention to life, regardless of the setting. A few thoughts below:

Communicate Intent and Approach. Any shift in interaction model benefits from clear communication and expectation setting. At work, agreeing to an “open door” policy might literally mean that leaders make themselves available at specific times for unscheduled pop-ins. For others, this might be more symbolic, signaling evergreen digital, analog, and emotional availability to giving or receiving feedback, without the overly structured anchor of a calendar event. Regardless of approach, ensuring a tight “say-do” ratio ensures credibility and allows for intent to translate into action.

Delineate Boundaries. Whether with family, friends, or colleagues, healthy interactions require respectful boundaries and giving grace when inevitable changes occur. Having an “open door” does not mean one person is at the 24/7 service of another. It does mean that they are a source of support and coaching and will make themselves available to help. For coworkers and managers, this requires a constructive triage of topics, separating the trivial from the significant issues. A certain amount of prep is required here for those walking through doors: What help is needed? How will I show up? How do I follow up after the fact? As Susan Cain writes, “If you find yourself on the receiving end of someone saying ‘no’ to you, try not to feel hurt, or rejected, which is sometimes easy to do. Instead, try to see the ‘no’ through a charitable lens.” I would also view the “no/not now” through a practical and growth lens; for example, focusing on how to keep timely information moving if a meeting is delayed.

Build a Welcoming Space. For anyone embracing an open-door mindset, it is essential to set up an equally open physical place for those who are returning to or entering it. There are tangible ways to do this (a calm, uncluttered home/office/mind, and a small token of hospitality), but the most important thing to get right is to listen well. Giving another human our attention when asked for it is a remarkable gift, especially when coupled with vulnerability and a new viewpoint. Personally, I am challenging myself to limit “unsolicited” advice and instead coach, ask better questions, and truly listen to understand.

At Hilton, our hotels offer an open door to hundreds of millions of guests each year around the world in safe, welcoming, life-changing, and magical ways. An open door, after all, is also symbolic of an openness to the infinite possibilities life offers us. It signals opportunity, perhaps a return home, but also new adventures and paths for shared exploration and growth. Ultimately, by embracing the open doors in our lives, we invite transformation and connection that can profoundly shape our journeys.

?