The One You Feed...

A grandfather is talking with his grandson.

The grandfather says, “In life, there are two wolves inside of us which are always at battle.?

One is a good wolf which represents things like kindness, bravery, and love.

The other is a bad wolf which represents things like greed, hatred, and fear”.

The grandson stops and thinks about it for a second then he looks up at his grandfather and says, “Grandfather, which one wins?”

The grandfather replies, “The one you feed.”

If you've been in sales for any length of time, you've undoubtedly hit a rough patch where you start to question everything you believe in. A couple of deals break the wrong way for you, a "sure thing" doesn't come through, or you have a few calls that just don't seem to click...

It's easy to start wondering if maybe you're not in the right position. It's not much of a stretch to call into question whether you're even good at selling. The next thing you know, you're considering new career options, considering going back to school, and wondering where it all went sideways...

Well, that escalated quickly...

You're not reading an article like this if you don't want to be successful, but it's important to remember that the peaks and valleys of success and failure each serve a purpose— to remind us that they each exist.

Every peak is cause for celebration, though we'd do well to remember that another relative valley is always ahead of us. When in those valleys, though they're trying and testy, it's important to remember that another peak is coming into view.

The goal is to make sure that over time, your peaks get higher and your valleys not as low.

If everything were a win, there'd be no purpose and you'd be bored. If everything were a loss, there'd be no point and you'd be demoralized.

While the peaks and valleys are a guarantee, what's really interesting is how often we mentally change our own fortune.

Confirmation bias is everywhere. You don't have to look hard to find a reason to justify whatever feeling you have right now.

If you think you're terrible at something, you're going to find (or even create!) evidence to support yourself. If you think you're the best in the world, you'll find plenty of proof too, and it's not as hard to find as you may think.

I find myself stuck in these ruts a handful of times a year. I question my decisions, second-guess things, and start to worry about being too far over my skis. That pattern tends to last until I catch a break or somebody pays me an unexpected compliment. While it's nice to snap out of it, it's terrifying to have to wait for something out of your control to make you feel like you have some control again.

At the core, I think this kind of doubt is healthy. It likely shows you're growing, taking on new challenges, and putting yourself in unfamiliar circumstances. If you're growing at a high rate and not doubting yourself every once in a while, you'd be some kind of sociopath.

It doesn't help that salespeople usually thrive on pats on the back and "attaboys." When you need one and you're not getting one, it's easy to start telling yourself stories about why you don't deserve them.

If the keys to snapping out of, or into, these mental funks are all in our heads, then you need to set up some sort of cadence or hygiene for your self-talk.

• Talk to yourself about how good you are because of what you've done in the past.
• Congratulate yourself for leaning into adversity.
• Remember that you're not expected to know it all, you're trusted to be able to solve difficult problems.
• Give yourself credit for being humble and seeking to understand situations before you make rash decisions.
• I can keep going...

Self-belief is the cornerstone to your success, and if you're not nurturing it as part of your self-care routine, you're missing a key component.

One of the things I've been reminding a lot of people to do lately is to keep a swipe file with all of the screenshots, thank you notes and other good news people have sent you. They'll help you remember that you're actually good at this, even when it feels like you're not.

Remind yourself of what you know to be true. You're right where you are today because of the peaks and valleys you've negotiated in the past. They're a part of life, there will be more, and you're capable of navigating them all.

Just remember that you play the leading role in how high or low the journey takes you.

Until next week,

JB

PS- this Friday is the charity golf outing I'm playing in. If you'd like to donate $100 , I'll enroll you in our summer coaching cohort with Lori Richardson , Kristie K. Jones , Larry Long Jr ?? , and Mike Simmons .

I'm Jeff Bajorek.?Salespeople look to me to help them overcome mediocrity while selling with integrity. You never sell better than when you?#SellLikeYou.

Listen and subscribe to my podcast on Apple ,?Spotify , or YouTube