One of the toughest letters I ever wrote. Fighting prejudice!

Principal XYZ

ABC International School, Powai, Mumbai.

Reference : Malicious lies about a disabled 6 year old with intent to have him expelled from school.

Ms. XYZ,

We have a lot of respect for you. I call you my sister. I know you care about Bhola. I am sure you will be shocked when you read the account below.

On June 30th, 2022 Ms Disha sent me a message with claims about being assaulted & grievously hurt by said infant, and being in pain hours after, and this upset other students in class. She left out key details of the incident which show the disabled child was in distress, lying on the ground trying to calm himself, when the incident happened. And it was inadvertent contact of an infant resisting, versus deliberate assault. That the child has, in the past, lain on the ground (always during break) to calm himself and returned to his seat by himself within a few minutes. That she on her own volition sought to intervene inappropriately, triggering the child to flail his limbs. That this happened during break and no students were in the least bothered.

Every single one of her claims were confuted categorically with explanation, in testimony by an infallible eye witness, a Government of Maharashtra employee Special Ed Teacher.

Incidents happen with ALL children and Bhola too has a lot more learning to do. Normal students in their late teens lash out too. So why is a 6 year old being shamed untruthfully? Even if we disregard the individual accusations, the structure of the message shows true malice. This is manifest by each sentence starting with a false claim of care, conjuncted with a “but/however”, ended with a false accusation. It is as if a script is being created, using key high impact words/ideas such as “Punched”, “Very strong”, “Uncontrolled aggression”, “pain and suffering of staff” and “distress to students”.

Are there people who still believe mentally handicapped persons are super strong? Why dont we send them to Olympic events then? FYI: Bhola is not the oldest, tallest or biggest kid in class, just average size. All his therapists, teachers and doctors attest, he is not aggressive. Yes like any kid his age, and since he can’t communicate like us, he has tantrums. But that is not malicious or deliberate, just desperation.

It is as if grounds are being concocted to kick the disabled kid out of his only way of survival: education.

In the words of the licensed Doctor of Therapy for Bhola, “I would say the teacher needs to be sensitized on how to handle him when he is in a bad mood and understand him as it’s hard for him to express. Hence he is going to get agitated. I’m sure even if he did hit, it won’t be hard and surely the teacher is not a baby that she couldn’t stop or block his hit. Every kid has mood swings and they can get physical. It’s ok to inform about his behavior but not to be super alarmed or dramatic about it”

Also, we question the self professed inability / lack of training by Disha to work with differently abled kids.

Teachers with BEd and DEd have mandatory training and months long internships with special needs kids.

April 16th during her vitriolic phone call to me, Ms. Rajalaxmi crossed the lines of decency. I haven’t had anyone speak to me like that ever! She claimed Bhola “was hitting students, teachers, everyone and he is too strong, can’t be controlled.”

Bhola had been tackled when heading in the wrong direction in the hall and locked up. We had come to school later than others. He had not entered his class yet. He had no contact with students. And your email did not mention anything about students either. I had later, led him to class where he sat down and stood up for the national anthem whereas Ms. Rajalaxmi was yelling at us from the window, to get out.

We see a pattern, repeated dramatic and exaggerated accounts of minor incidents.

We have smoothened all issues. We have a shadow teacher, Govt teacher, I have personally trained the child to be in class, I am waiting outside the school in the sun and rain for 3 to 4 hours while he is in class - available to address any and every concern. Our shadow teachers are trained by doctoral therapists from India and US.

Bhola is under treatment from 4 of the top doctors of Mumbai. All concur that he is very very young, psychotropic meds will mess up his brain and body for the rest of his life. Heart arrhythmia, respiratory disorder, social imbalance, addiction, gynecomastia, the list is endless. But we are giving him meds, because we are terrified of him being kicked out of school.

All children are essentially untrained savages, is why they are sent to school. And after 2 years of covid lock-down even “normal” students are not integrating in the classroom, is apparent.

Many other parents are in denial about their kid’s issues. But here you are seeing me work tremendously hard with every scientific, medical, therapeutic, educational tool available in India, US and Europe.

The first few weeks are crucial. If we are patient, and train Bhola to integrate, then he will. He did attend Podar for kindergarten for 2 years. The class teacher had doubts initially, but with a supportive leadership from Podar and interactive feed back with me and the therapists, we ironed out all problems and Bhola attended school without a shadow teacher.

Now we have a shadow teacher who will accompany Bhola everyday and also a Govt teacher, but what we need is understanding of the class teacher, and correct leadership from the coordinator. I am afraid, after hearing from other parents, Rajalaxmi has inherent deep rooted prejudices which preclude this.

Also we need access to the sensory room, the ultimate tool for mentally disabled kids.

And dealing with unruly kids is the essential job description of a teaching role. This is an essential occupational hazard. The teacher has to be motivated & understanding, this comes from a holistic attitude from all concerned.

We have to understand that Bhola is Autistic and brilliant. Dr. Richa Tanna at Gurukul School for special children said Bhola is not eligible to admission there, because he is exceptionally smart. In their school there are kids with cerebral palsy, mental retardation, severe down syndrome. Kids who in higher grades are learning basic alphabets. Bhola finished addition and subtraction at the age of 4. How could he fit in?

So where will Bhola go then?

Bhola needs education to LIVE. When I die, he will be alone. How will he support himself if he is not trained? He will die in his late teens or 20’s as do other such kids without treatment & education. Is that what we want?

I had talked to you about medication. We have to have realistic feedback from the class teacher so as to adjust the dose for optimal functionality. There has to be tolerance and understanding. Bhola can’t communicate. He has sensory issues, he literally senses gravity differently than us (proprioception).

Yes, he will make mistakes. But hey, all kids do that, don’t they? They argue, shout, hit things and people. They are kids. They are growing and their hormones are not balanced. Teenagers do it, and Bhola is just an infant!

Are we the British judges of the mid 19th century, like in Charles Dickens’ Oliver Twist, where minor children were hanged for being pickpockets? Because the rich couldn’t tolerate the hapless?

You do realize that denying Bhola an education is a death sentence.

We are not children, we have children. We have to look at things fom a strategic perspective. Good of one, good of all! ? ????? ?????? ??????, ????? ????? ????????? ????? ??????? ???????? ?? ????????????????????

Communicate with me in a benign way. Talk to me, I will do everything. Pay for calls with top ranked US and Indian therapists and psychiatrists to help deal with circumstances. I am here to help! But every time there is unnecessary drama, and we have to keep Bhola from school, he forgets his training (especially in the early days) and we have to start from scratch again. That’s just frustration and hard work for everyone, especially Bhola.

When 1/32 kids were born with Autism in 2018 and the numbers are increasing, we cannot turn a blind eye to it. The law don’t allow it. Because if we do not integrate these kids in to society, then society will collapse. Maharashtra Govt law states, it is the responsibility of the school to ensure the disabled child is integrated in to school, and that he cannot be held back or expelled. If anyone has a problem with this, then she needs to approach the State and Federal government and have the laws re-written. Mental harassment of disabled child, fabricating malicious lies to expel a disabled kid admitted through the RTE system, violate Civil & Penal statutes.

I beseech you, in the name of the law and humanity. I know you have a good heart and you and the school are committed to the right of education. Mr. (Board chairman) himself confirmed it. We cannot have a few bad apples ruin the entire barrel.

I request you to strike these false incidents from Bhola’s record. And foster an environment of care and understanding. I have told you in the past, I am a slave to my son and his needs. My formidable abilities, resources, contacts, are yours to command. I am your servant because you are the most important person in the world to me, my son’s Guru!

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Sincerely,

Kaushik Lodh.

July 11, 2022