The One Thing You Should Never Do When You Work in a Startup

"You think too much."

That's what Veems CEO told me during one of our feedback sessions.

We make it a point to give each other feedback after a meeting or a brainstorming session. That way we know our strengths and the things we can improve on. 

I opened my mouth and attempted a rebuttal, but nothing came out. I looked at my feet hoping to find something to prove he's wrong.

I gave up. "He's right. I do think too much." I thought to myself. 

I think it comes with being a writer. That's what writers do best: think. Despite enrolling myself into the Always Take Action bootcamp this year, I still fall into the Thinking Too Much trap from time to time. I think I know why. Doubt. That's the culprit.

When you're a writer, you always doubt yourself. It doesn't matter whether you're writing a journal entry or a novel, the doubt is always there trying to sabotage your attempts to create art. As I typed the word "art", I rolled my eyes. I don't consider this drivel art. It's not worth reading. Why do I even bother?

Now, imagine a writer working in a startup. A startup is an environment where--if you let it--can be riddled with doubt. The higher the stakes, the bigger the doubt. Is what we're doing really worth it? How can we compete with the big guys? Why should we even try?

Doubting yourself. Doubting what you do. Doubting what you're trying to fight for. That's something you should never do when you're in a startup.

It doesn't matter which stage you are or which role you play. Doubt is the enemy of productivity. Doubt leads to confusion. And when you are confused, you don't take action. You lose even before you start.

So, how do you get rid of doubt and fear?

The thing is, you don't.

The more you fight something, the more it fights back.

Often times, we are taught to "overcome fear." Instead, you must "ride the fear." Marie Forleo, the entrepreneur and host behind Marie TV, taught me how to do this.

Here’s how: Party with your fear.

“Experience fear as a sensation in your body without going into the mental drama.”

Sensation:

• Butterflies in your stomach
• Lump in your throat 
• Sweaty palms

Mental Drama:

• I’m freaking scared. 
• I’m going to fail. 
• I don’t know what’s going to happen next.

It’s like riding a roller coaster. It’s freaking scary. You get butterflies in your stomach. You feel a lump in your throat. Your palms start to sweat as you hold on to the handles for dear life.

But when the ride starts, the fear turns into exhilaration. You scream. You smile. At some point, you let go of the handles and wave your hands.

During our meetings for the last quarter, I got really scared. I was given, at that time, an almost impossible goal. I didn’t know where to start. I created a comprehensive to-do list. I wrote every possible strategy. The goal haunted me in my dreams. During bus rides, it’s all I thought about. I almost missed my stop one time. My to-do lists, outlines, and strategies, they weren’t getting me anywhere.

And then I finally said to myself, “Enough.”

I remembered Marie Forleo’s advice about riding the fear. I accepted the fact that I was scared and that the goal was very ambitious. But I stopped thinking about what could happen. I started taking action. I sent pitches via email even though they weren’t perfect. I found the courage to talk to people and ask them. I just kept doing something and moving forward. 

And then three days after, I accomplished the goal.

I was ecstatic. I cheered. I waved my hands.

During our last meeting for the year (before our CEO went back to Israel), his  feedback:

“I’m so proud of you. I know you think too much sometimes. But you learn very fast. And you get things done.”

“Thank you!” I replied as I experienced another wave of exhilaration. 

Whether you’re working in a startup or a writer finishing your first book, you’ll always find yourself in doubt. Don’t block it out. Acknowledge its existence and keep working anyway.

What do you think of the idea of "partying with your fear?" Do you have other ways of dealing with doubts and fear? 

 Sharing one of my favorite quotes when I'm filled with doubt: