The one thing that changes everything

The smoothness of the wood slides along my forearm. As the chords fill my room with harmonies, I focus my eyes on the neck of my fender acoustic. Following along with the instructor in the video, I pluck the C-string. My heart beats to the strum of my hands. 

I am playing the guitar!

I am not a spring chicken anymore. Sure, I pretty much feel like I am in my 20s most days. I sing like nobody is watching even when they are. I act like a kid when I go to amusement parks or animal habitats. 

Age is a feeling, not a destination. 

I am a very young 44-year-old. 44! I guess the world sees that as middle-aged. Do middle-aged men pick up the guitar for the first time and start playing it? Is that a thing? Is this a mid-life crisis? Nah, that's a cliche people, who are afraid to live their lives, say about people who aren't afraid to live their lives.

In the “Artist’s Way,” by Julia Cameron, she talks about a student that asked if learning to play the guitar at 50 was a waste of time. When she asked him if he thought he’d be alive at 60, he said yes. “Then do you want to be a 60-year-old who knows how to play the guitar or a 60-year-old who wishes he knew how to play the guitar?” I might be paraphrasing there, but either way - you get the point.

Developing a growth mindset is a journey, not a destination. Much in the same vein as the aging process - it's just a part of the journey. When we are “young,” and maybe you are still considered “young,” we think of aging in many different ways.

An example of some of my thinking…when I was a kids I wanted to be older so badly that I even said ridiculous stuff like, “I wish I was older so I could do whatever I wanted.” When I got into my 20s, I wanted to stay in college forever because it was a blast! In my 30s, I began to relish the days when I had tons of free time and much less responsibility. By my 40s, I was recalling my youth fondly (sometimes) and very much wanted to step into this "adulting" thing I saw trending in so many lives around me. I assume at 50 and beyond, I will be thrilled to have figured out so much about myself and, the universe willing, will have a better grip on this thing called life.

What I have figured out beyond anything else is that believing I can figure this life out is a huge part of the fun in this challenge of existence. Having a growth mindset is literally an accomplishment in and of itself, but it is not the destination, it's just the water you bring along for the journey. Without water the journey is arduous. Without a growth mindset the journey is arduous. In both cases the journey will be a slog without those two resources.

I now realize, after years of inner turmoil, I can learn any new skill, can pick up any new hobby, can literally change anything about myself, if I am willing and able to prioritize it in my life. If I believe I can then I can. If I believe I can’t then I can’t. Either way I get to be right.

The one thing that changes everything is knowing I am capable of anything I desire if I put in the effort and am disciplined toward it daily. This is something we as children inherently think about ourselves - unless an adult drills otherwise into us. Children don’t understand limitations unless an adult, or gravity, imprints and implants the idea of limitations into us. Children just do things with little analyzation. Adults can stop themselves before they get started - paralysis though analysis.

As adults we have to put a concerted amount of effort into just getting our minds right around the challenges and changes we desire to accomplish in our lives - and then we have to actually go out and do the doing, do the actioning.

Developing a growth mindset is imperative. You can have it in one area of your life and not in others. The quest is to actualize it into every area of your life. Then you too can pick up a guitar, or anything else for that matter, at the still not ripe age of 44 - and just do it.