One Side of My Soul

Every morning, I make it a point to roam around my yard. It's become a part of my daily routine, a habit passed down to me by my late mother. The stillness and chill of the early hours always leave me feeling like an outsider in my own surroundings.

Pausing for a moment, I find myself drawn to the muted shades of the lake's edge and the rhythmic pattern of water droplets falling from the branches. Yet, given the changes in my life, I quickly retreat back to the comfort and distractions indoors, a lingering sensation of being trailed prompting my hasty return. Despite this, a part of me longs to linger outside, enveloped in solitude for an extended period of time.

Josef Pieper, a prominent Catholic philosopher, observed that in the modern age, people have become unable to truly see because they are bombarded with an overwhelming amount of visual stimuli. He suggested that this excessive exposure to images, memes, and fleeting texts has hindered our capacity for deep perception.

Similarly, Pieper suggested that our ability to hear has also been compromised due to the sheer volume of auditory input in our daily lives. Instead of being surrounded by meaningful sound, we find ourselves engulfed in a constant barrage of noise and chatter. In light of this perspective, it can be argued that the opposite of music is not silence, but rather the chaotic cacophony of meaningless noise that surrounds us for its own sake.

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A close friend shared with me this sacred wisdom he gained while working in Thailand for nearly 3 years. He learned these lessons from an ex-monk who shared these insights:

The first lesson is that the most important time is the Now, the importance of being in the present. The second lesson, the most important person in the present or the Now, is yourself when you are alone. If there is another, that person is important. The third lesson, the most important thing you must do in the Now is to care and give all your attention to the other person. Simply meaning the utmost self-care of yourself when alone.

Perhaps having walked that journey you are on, I can say that healing requires effort from the self. Only if you choose to heal can you find healing. I have learned that while there may be others who will walk with you on this path you are on, no one can walk it for you.

For a few days, I found myself struggling to manage my emotions after misinterpreting my fiancee's mood (but we've worked things out, thanks for your concern). See, when life becomes a whirlwind of various distractions and exciting events, it can have a profound impact on our physical and mental well-being.

The relentless pace can leave us feeling physically exhausted and mentally drained as if we've been running a never-ending marathon. The constant influx of information bombarding us from all directions can overwhelm our senses, leading to a state of mental fog and confusion.

In this state, our minds and bodies struggle to keep up with the fast-paced nature of life. Our thoughts may race, making it difficult to concentrate or fully engage with the present moment. We may find ourselves lost in a sea of thoughts, unable to fully appreciate the beauty or significance of our experiences.

This constant state of busyness often manifests itself in our physical appearance. Frustration and stress can be etched onto our faces, creating lines of tension and weariness. The weight of the world seems to rest upon our shoulders, causing us to carry ourselves with a heaviness that reflects the burdens we carry within.

However, amidst this chaos, there is a need to reconnect with the present moment. To find solace in the midst of the storm, we must consciously slow down and pay attention. It is in these moments of intentional presence that we can fully absorb the lessons learned and apply them to our experiences.

To do this, we must continuously reset and refocus our attention. Just as a chair needs to be repositioned repeatedly to find the most comfortable spot, we too must keep seating ourselves in the present moment, allowing ourselves to fully experience and appreciate life's offerings.

By embracing the practice of being present, we can break free from the cycle of exhaustion and frustration. We can regain control over our thoughts, emotions, and actions, and find a sense of clarity and peace within the chaos.

So, let us remember to slow down, take a deep breath, and immerse ourselves fully in the present moment, for it is here that true growth and understanding reside.

When you have identified that something is beyond your ability to control (the past, changing other people, or the future), you need to do the following:

• Ask yourself if there is anything you can do RIGHT NOW about whatever it is that you are concerned about. Can you say or do something about it? Can you develop a plan or a course of action or a contingency plan for “what if” situations? Can you determine what your boundaries or non-negotiables are?

• Decide if you ARE going to do anything about what you have decided you CAN do. Just because you can do something doesn’t mean that you have to. As psychologist William James advised, remind yourself that “you can, and you have a choice.”

• Leave what you cannot control to the superheroes of your choice. If you believe in a Higher Power, God, or Superman, Wonder Woman, or The Black Panther…please just try to trust that your superhero is doing what needs to be done in those rooms that are off-limits to you, you meddling human! Or you can just trust that you’re better off leaving some things alone.

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