One Score and Fifteen Years

“The language of friendship is not words but meanings.”

– Henry David Thoreau

I remember so well
Certain things my father said
One of them which was:..
"Once grown, You will be lucky, to count the number of your true friends on one hand."

Little then did I know
One word would ring few..

And as less than nimble fingers
I write these words to you

Little did I then know
As youth does it show
How innocence spares the lost
But you may ask..
At what cost?

Yet dear father I know you had not the heart, 
Too young he thought..To make me aware
A word used too often
More often, than naught

For those with many friends
I would ask, as many years past
How many did you find?
Are they still, close, and near?

And I pondered
What better sadness could one bare
The window outside me, barren, no one there.

Years passed, friends came, and left
Spent and warred
The years I had dared
Age, unforgiving, the world craven not to care

Do not be mislead
For there are those who have many a true friend
Yet for many, it is the reverse
For reasons, nor hither, nor there

My dreams though never betrayed me
I closed my eyes to recall, friends no longer there
The memories of Laughter, and glorious fare 
Happiness yet was fading
Creases and turns
How increasingly rare

And I opened my hand and counted
Not yet one, still there..
I Crossed through mind's memories
Times began fraught, seen only, through a diminutive thread

You have most likely heard this timeless adage..
Told to me by my dearest and loving late father
Small as a child, 
Protected by care
Little then did I know
'True' dare not. The most beautiful of words.
Its meaning, enduringly
Now, and forever.
Its meaning, left unimpaired

I oft spent my days wondering
Years passed. With them, friends come and gone.
Slowly the days passed 
I watched the clock turn where my father would sit 
Above his old rocking chair

I opened up my hand and counted
Without wist, I again, laid solemn into my bed

I crossed through mind's memories
Years forgotten, seen only through a thread

I closed my eyes to shorten
Friends no longer there.
The memories of Laughter, became increasingly rare

More years would pass
Many friends would come, then go
Tears fought for each path taken
Alone, days lay forgotten.. 
Perhaps, Forever??
And I nodded my head.

But I continued to believe, still refusing to dare..
That as the days grew longer
One excellent day would surely make me aware

Days and nights, my mind, continued to wander
I sat alone, with an open hand..
Nothing. 
Lonesome, deserted..
With grievous tidings, I once again, closed my hand

Detached and weary, 
I looked into the mirror, 
Only to see a forsaken, and surrendering stare
The days and nights, continued their fare...

More years would pass
More friends would come, then go
Alone, days lay forgotten.. 
Tears fought, for each path 
I slumbered, my eyes then closed.

Long days and nights would continue
Fewer friends would come, then go
Giving not heed of my dread
I sat alone. Seclusion.
Again, I opened again my hand...

Nothing..
Lonesome. 
Deserted
Grievous tidings, a stirring longing
And with tears invisible to all but me
A simple tear I watched, as it fell rightly onto my hand.

I again laid down solemn
Waiting for the dreams which did comfort
For a moment I thought.. perhaps I am already dead?

Now, Detached and weary, 
I looked into the mirror
Perhaps to ask for surrender?... 
Only to see, a forsaken, and surrendering stare

The days and nights, continued their fare.

And then on one marvelous day
No less a day past my birthday
This day was not like any other!
Perhaps only time it took for fate to find me
Far from my normal, lonesome, and longing stare

I received a letter
I instantly recognized the familiar writing!
My dearest friend from youth had found me!
To rejoice in a moment's breath..
My father's words, sat before me. 
And I felt his presence. 
He was also there.  

I laid the letter before me
Longing fingers, if being asked; Forgave me.
And I uttered.."Au fait!" 
A song could not have uttered so brightly!

Not a more bountiful gift!
A touch of a moment
I read each word with tender and splendid fare

It was then I realized..
Those years of discontent, and silent despair
Invisible in my thirst
He knew, one day, she would find me
Neither here, nor hither there

What joy brought to me this day
Humble now I can say
Such stories do come true!

The words of my father
Speaking again to me
A wonder!
Now I can share

And I thought back to that day
With his warmth and loving care
The day I sat with him as he gave to me his wisdom 
I can still see him now, sitting in his old rocking chair

A world once thought empty
Left stranded in a world I thought musn't care
Now finds me surely!
Her words bound me tightly
And I opened my hand once more
Yet now with a long, and loving stare

The words of my father
Never had been untrue!
And it was only then
I knew my emptiness 
Was all but time granted
A wanting, awaiting its time to be true

The wise words my father once told me
As now we both speak of how many times we both counted
The days we now call a most glorious wonder!
No longer would, we be asunder

And I thought to myself
One is enough.
So I give this ode to you. 

Never forget the words heard said when you were young
In the flames of the fireplace, 
We sometimes believe we can see him 
Sitting in his old rocking chair. 

Dedicated to L.R.E
        

Dedicated to?L.R.

https://savingtess.wordpress.com/2022/09/28/one-score-and-fifteen-years/E        

Dedicated to?L.R.E

https://savingtess.wordpress.com/2022/09/28/one-score-and-fifteen-years/