One to One by Robertson Hunter
INTRODUCTION
One of the biggest problems that managers and supervisors at all levels have today is the limited time they have available to accomplish everything they have to do. This can be stressful and often we find ourselves asking the question: “Are we making the best use of our time?” However, this is not the only question that we should be asking ourselves as managers in this regard. Should we not also be querying whether or not we are optimizing our team members’ time?
So just what is this notion of quality time? My definition of quality time spent with individual team members would be as follows:
Time where both of the participants get something valuable from the conversation and which adds value to the organization.
This definition highlights the fact that having quality one-to-one meetings is profitable for you, the employee and the organization. For you and the employee, it’s an opportunity to build a working relationship based on mutual understanding and trust. For the organization as a whole, it can and does lead to a position of sustainable competitive advantage and enhanced profits.
The framework that I have used for this book is the use of pertinent questions, namely 5WH questions, as follows:
? What
? Why
? When
? Where
? Who
WHAT
So what exactly is a one-to-one meeting?
Well, first and foremost, it is a meeting where you will be spending time with an individual team member as opposed to the team as a whole. Secondly, and perhaps more importantly, it is neither an informal meeting, nor just a quick chat! Too often, as managers, we spend far too much of our time meeting with employees and talking to them in an informal way (for example at the coffee machine). This is not necessarily a bad thing in itself as long as it doesn’t take up too much of your or yours employee’s time. A one-to-one is a meeting where you are going to discuss a number of different subjects with your employee in a formal and structured way. This is also a meeting in which you should be meeting with your direct reports (N-1) only.
It is not a meeting where the employee is called to the office for a quick chat not knowing why they have been called in the first place and, even worse, leaving the office five minutes later being none the wiser (you know what I’m talking about here, right?). The team member should have an extremely clear idea of what the meeting is going to be about and exactly what his/her role and or contribution is to be in this meeting.
Some employees (at whatever level, managers included) might not be used to this kind of approach at all and need to be reassured as to the purpose of the meeting and what exactly is expected from them during the meeting (their role): “Am I to sit there and listen while the boss blabbers on for god knows how long? Am I expected to speak about something at some point and, if so, about what exactly?
To avoid these types of unnecessary (and often stress-inducing) questions, it should be explained to the employee that this is to be a highly participative meeting and, even more than that, it should be explained to them that they have “ownership” of this meeting. One of the best ways to get the point across here is to use the very first one-to-one meeting to explain to the team member in detail what is expected from them in future meetings, how often these meetings are to take place and that this is “his (or her) time.” Other important information to give to the employee during this explanation is just why the meeting is named as either a one-to-one meeting or quality time, and you should underline just how significant this is.
To ensure the success and additional value of these meetings, we as managers must ensure in every way possible that the employee not only understands the purpose of these meetings but that they are comfortable with the entire concept and the process. This is particularly important if these types of meetings have not been held before within the organization. You do need to explain why these meetings are so important to them and also why they are important to you as a manager and to the organization as a whole. For example, there is nothing wrong with saying to an employee: “One of the reasons for these meetings is that I really need to hear more of your ideas on how we can improve the shop floor operations” or “We need to spend more time together to look over and track the yearly objectives that we have set together for this year.
My suggestion is that these meetings should last for a minimum of one hour in order to give adequate time for some in-depth communication and relationship building
From a management perspective, it is crucial to ensure that the correct level of importance is given to and seen to be given to these meetings by management at all levels
So, in summary, a one-to-one meeting should:
? Be as participative as possible
? Have a clear purpose
? Have adequate time for in-depth discussion
? Be clearly defined (what are you going to talk about?)
? Be frequent
? Be formal (with minutes taken at each meeting)
? Be a source of commitment to action
That’s enough about what a one-to-one meeting is. What about what you are going to discuss? To that end, I have always found it useful to discuss the following topics:
? How the person is getting along in general (how are they?)
? How are they getting on with the other team members (particularly important when the person is new to the organization)
? How things are going on the shop floor
? Discussion about areas for improvement in operations
? A point on his or her objectives
? Resources (does the team member have adequate tools to do their job?)
This list of bullet points gives some very good pointers to areas for discussion but is by no means exhaustive
WHY
The mere fact that you take the time to meet with individuals one-to-one is already in itself a form of recognition. What you are saying to them is: “Yes, you are important enough that I make time for you.” Recognition is important to just about everyone; we all like to know how we are doing, how we are seen by those that we work with and to get “a pat on the back” from time to time. If we have the feeling that “we are just a number” we are not likely to find purpose or motivation in what we do. Giving time to people is, then, one of the keys to motivation and engagement.
According to several reliable sources, more than two thirds of the variance in employee engagement scores can be accounted for by the relationship that a manager has with their direct reports.
As managers, we all know that people who are both motivated and engaged with the organization are far more likely to be highly productive and loyal. Although being well paid is important for people at work, employees will only go that extra mile if they are listened to, motivated and recognized for what they are doing. People need to have a purpose at work and listening attentively to them during a one-to-one is a very good way of reinforcing a healthy working relationship with your employee.
One of the main underlying principles of carrying out one-to-one meetings is to give purpose to your employee’s time so that they engage with both yourself as the manager and the organization
Another reason that these meetings are so important is to do with the sharing of information. We all know the expression “information is power” and this is so true in any organization as, without information that is clear, accurate, precise and timely, it can become extremely difficult to run any company or organization, in particular, organizations which have an extremely vertical structure of their hierarchy (top-down)
Let’s put all of this another way:
- If you don’t meet with your subordinates at all, you will have no information and, in the absence of information, you will not be in a position to make decisions (or good decisions in any case).
- If you don’t meet with your subordinates on a regular basis, the information that you have will not be timely (recent enough); once again, decisions based on this information will quite probably not prove to be optimal.
- If you do meet with your subordinates on a regular basis, but the objective or purpose of the meeting is not clear, you may obtain information, but it runs the risk of not being very clear or precise. In addition to this, the employee will not “buy into” the one-to-one process so there will be a lack of trust or confidence. Under these circumstances, the quality of information obtained is likely to be quite poor
In addition, the fact that you are having regular meetings which are structured and where the employee is given the opportunity to express themselves will eventually lead to the building of confidence and trust and, in the vast majority of cases, this will lead to an increase in the volume and quality of information shared.
There’s a great quote that underlines the importance of strengthening relationships with your reports:
“People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Theodore Roosevelt
Last, but by no means least, as a manager and as mentioned in the introduction, you have to try to ensure that you manage your time correctly or in as optimal a fashion as possible. We have all heard the expression “plan your work and then work your plan” and you’re most probably also aware of the five Ps of planning:
? Proper
? Planning
? Prevents
? Poor
? Performance
So, in summary, as to why we should hold one-to-one meetings, they allow us to:
? Recognize the importance of individuals
? Monitor performance during the course of the year
? Adjust objectives when, and if necessary
? Build relationships with our employees based on confidence and trust
? Heighten the engagement, motivation and productivity of our employees
? Reduce unnecessary recruitment and training costs related to high turnover
? Ensure better decision making for management, based on timely and accurate information from the “shop floor”
? Create the opportunity to pick up on great ideas from employees
? Find out how team members feel
? Better manage our time”
WHEN
At first view, this might not seem particularly important and you might be tempted to say, based on what we have seen: “Well, as long as it’s fairly regular it shouldn’t matter should it?
What if we start by asking ourselves the question about how often we should be holding these meetings? Is there a minimum or maximum frequency? In my experience, the absolute minimum frequency would be at the end of each quarter (or once every three months). However, do remember what we said earlier about timely information which helps towards making well-informed decisions. Strictly speaking, at whatever level an employee is currently at, this will at least give opportunities to gauge performance compared to quarterly results.
I have in the past been in the habit of holding these meetings with senior managers in my executive teams on a monthly basis. This gave each of them time to prepare between meetings and also avoided interfering with their operational responsibilities. To go further, I would suggest that this is an extremely good cycle for employees at any level whether or not they are in a supervisory/managerial position. There is one exception here though and it’s quite a big one. For line staff, we might actually consider having these one-to-one meetings more often but for less time; in some cases it might be a good idea to have meetings with your line staff once a week!
So, in summary, to make sure these meetings happen with optimal timing, the following should be considered:
? Meetings planned at least once a month
? Avoid meetings just after lunch
? Schedule meetings mid-morning or the middle of the afternoon where possible
? Avoid too early in the morning or too late in the evening
? Don’t take people out of operations at peak times for meetings
? Where possible, schedule meetings on midweek days (Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday)”
WHERE
Do ensure that the place you hold the meeting is
? Correctly lit
? At the optimal temperature
? With the least interference from possible noise and, in particular, other people’s conversations”
WHO
You should be having these meetings with every single person in your team. The qualifying condition is that the person should be reporting directly to you; in other words, you should be their immediate superior.
This point is extremely important and the task of meeting your direct reports is not something that can or should be delegated under any circumstances. The reasons for this are both extremely important and multiple. Try to imagine the impact of your own direct boss carrying out the one-to-one meetings with your subordinates. Some probable impacts of this would be as follows:
? It would cause a problem with your positioning as a leader for your subordinates (their perception of “yeah, he’s the boss but not really”)
? Your boss will not have the same level of knowledge about each of the employees as you do and this will degrade the quality of the meetings
? Your employees might be tempted to “go over your head” on a very frequent basis
? It will look like your boss does not trust you as a manager or leader”
Once done, we must ensure that everyone concerned is comfortable in carrying out these meetings. For this to happen, an agreed upon method on how to carry out these meetings is crucial. This is critical if we wish to give ourselves the maximum chance of successfully putting these meetings in place.
HOW
If you are starting to put in place these meetings, the very first thing that you need to do is to inform the people with whom you are going to be having the meetings as to why you are going to start the meetings and when.
Once done, you can then start looking at exactly how you are going to make sure that these meetings are going to be as effective as possible. We have already seen some of the important elements which will help ensure that optimal conditions are created, such as planning the meetings at optimal times and ensuring that your employee has sufficient information about the meeting well in advance so that he or she can prepare for it. We have also already looked at the importance of the physical conditions of the space where the meeting will take place.
The welcoming phase of the one-to-one meeting is extremely important and, in particular, if your employee is not yet used to participating in this type of meeting. Just as when welcoming a friend to your home, you really do have to make sure that everything is done to prepare a great welcome and ensure that your team member feels completely at ease
Now it’s time to get to the heart of the matter, that is to say, the formal part of the meeting. In order to “run” this part of the meeting in an optimal way there should be a certain amount of structure to it.
I find the following to be a good guide to structure this type of meeting:
SCOP: Sales - Costs - Operations - People
You are of course completely free to use another framework to run your one-to-one meetings. The advantage of the SCOP is that it is a tried and tested method so why take time to reinvent the wheel?
Now that we’ve talked about giving structure to your meetings, let’s discuss some of the behavioural aspects that are important to the effectiveness of this type of meeting
As Jimmy Hendrix once said: “Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.”
So, do remember that you are not holding a one-to-one meeting to display the in-depth level of your knowledge in order to “impress the hell out of your employee.” You are there first and foremost to listen to him or her”.
When thinking about how to carry out one-to-one meetings, the earlier Roosevelt quote is just so important! Especially when you consider that the act of attentively listening to your team member will, apart from anything else, act as the glue which will go toward reinforcing your working relationship with them
Nevertheless, as always, there can be exceptions to this 80/20 rule such as when a junior employee is having his or her first one-to-one with their manager and they’re not yet confident enough to talk openly or in enough detail. Your job here will be to find ways in which to encourage the employee to talk by listening attentively to what he or she does say and then asking pertinent questions regarding what was just said or by asking for more details or explanations.
Then, when they do start to express themselves more easily and with confidence, you must ensure that you are listening very attentively indeed”
There are several important stages involved in being or becoming a better listener during one-to-one conversations. First, being attentive during the conversation means giving 100% of your attention to the person who’s in front of you and not, for example, sending or answering an SMS when you are meant to be listening to them. It also involves, as we said earlier, not formulating your answers or your own questions mentally whilst you are supposed to be listening and training yourself to do this in an active manner. It certainly doesn’t involve leaving the meeting to answer a telephone call under any circumstances!
Asking open questions is very important if you wish to have a fulfilling conversation. If you constantly ask questions such as “Do you agree with that?” or “Is that a good or a bad thing?” you will constantly get yes or no answers, which can quickly make a conversation very short or make it seem very long (not to mention a bit one-sided). In place of those questions, you could ask, for example, “Why exactly do you disagree with that?” or “What makes you say that what we’ve just said is a good or a bad thing?” You will receive more information and, not only that; you will constantly be encouraging the person you’re with to express their opinion.
Probing questions exist to give detail and context whilst, at the same time, showing real interest in the answer that you have just been given to the open question. So, questions such as “Could you give me some more detail?” or “More specifically, what did you mean in your last point?” can help to get useful detail and give more context to your discussion.
Another technique that’s sometimes useful in dealing with experts is what I like to call “the 3 Whys” technique. Basically, by the time that you have asked why three times about the expert’s original answer to a question you should get to the level of detail or simplification needed for you to understand.
When you have clarification and think that you have understood perfectly, paraphrasing is an extremely good way to make sure that you have. For example, you might say something like “So, if I understood correctly, this means that you have found a way to improve the quality of production, is that right?” In this way, you are doing two things. First, you are showing that you have been listening and are interested in what has been said. Secondly, you are checking that you have perfectly understood and are giving an opportunity to the other person to correct or give further detail or context
It’s also important to pay attention to how the person is feeling during the meeting and to try and reflect those feelings. Paying attention to feelings may seem obvious, but does mean paying attention to both verbal and non-verbal communication.
Something not yet mentioned is the veritable power of silence! Try not to slip into the all too familiar habit of answering your own questions either partially or fully. Remember what we spoke about earlier, the fact that we should always be asking open questions. What was not mentioned is that we have to give people time to respond to these questions.
This may seem like a fairly time-consuming process at the beginning, but with time and practice, you will find that acquiring these skills will help you run more effective meetings.
On the other hand, do not fall into the trap of never congratulating at all and only giving constant feedback on areas for improvement. Even small wins can be extremely important for employees. Don’t forget to celebrate success as this is key to both employee motivation and engagement. Having said all of this, feedback is not always of a positive nature, unfortunately. Sometimes, you will need to give feedback about the required improvements concerning the performance or behavior of certain team members
This is something that must not be avoided at any cost. Often, younger or less experienced managers have a tendency to “smooth over” or “brush aside” matters of concern so as to “keep the peace” so to speak. This is a terrible mistake and can lead to more serious issues with the concerned individual as well as with the team. After all, as a manager, you must be seen to be fair to all members of the team from both an individual and collective point of view.
Still, it’s not always pleasant or easy to give “negative feedback” to a team member. Fortunately, there is a very good management technique which can help us with this. I call this the EASY method:
Explain to the team member the exact nature of the problem, area for improvement, unacceptable behavior or lower than normal performance
Ask him or her if they have understood exactly what you have said to them and check thoroughly for understanding
Solve Yourself. In certain cases, the employee may not find the appropriate answer or solution to the problem. In these cases you are going to have to be more directive and point out the required solution to the problem. In this instance, your role will be more that of a mentor rather than a coach in explaining exactly what the solution is going to be and ensuring that it is understood
Whether the situation is solved in a participative or a more direct manner, agreement still has to be reached as to how the corrective action is to be put in place
When giving this type of feedback, you should also ensure that your tone of voice and body language are giving the same message as the words that you are using
In other words, there should not be a dichotomy between your verbal and non-verbal language
Do, however, remember that there is a big difference between giving constructive feedback on a difficult point or area for improvement to someone and a disciplinary interview. The regular one-to-one meeting is not the place for discipline or disciplinary procedures. If this is required at any stage, this must be the object of an entirely different meeting.
For me, there are four important words to bear in mind constantly when you are giving feedback to one of your team:
Be Honest
Be Fair
Be Direct
Be Consistent
CONCLUSION
As a summary, and in order to reunite all of the key success factors for holding one-to-one meetings (or quality time), I have produced the following diagram as a summary and reminder
The key success factors then are:
? Meetings should be prepared in advance so that all parties are correctly prepared for the meeting and advised of the content of the meeting in advance (such as the agenda). Remember the five P’s of planning here: Proper Planning Prevents Poor Performance.
? Meetings are planned regularly to ensure that relationships are correctly formed over time and that they are planned at times which are convenient as well as possible for both participants.
? The optimal environmental and physical conditions must be in place during the meeting to ensure that you and the participant are “100% in the meeting” and not distracted either by physical discomfort or intrusions on your concentration such as other people’s conversations nearby.”
? A warm welcome should be extended to the participant at the beginning of the meeting to ensure his or her comfort within the meeting environment and to ensure that he/she is at ease and has the opportunity to communicate in an optimum way.
? Give structure to the meeting to facilitate both the recurrent nature of the meeting and to ensure the efficiency of follow up on any outstanding issues and the participant’s main objectives. This also allows the meeting to “flow” smoothly.
? Use your attentive listening skills during the meeting to enhance communication and further build confidence and trust with your employee.
? Remember that the participant owns the meeting. This does not mean that he or she “runs” the meeting. What it does mean is:
? He/she should be doing most of the talking.
? He/she should take the notes from the meeting on a document to be sent to you before the next meeting.
? He/she should be offering content for the meeting and for the agenda.
? We are talking mainly about the participant’s objectives, goals, development, ideas and operational concerns during the meeting.