One Relationship Blocking Your Promotion

Relationships are complex. For Valentine's Day, I will let you on on a very important relationship in your life. It is the relationship that will help or hurt your career. It is the relationship with your boss. People leave bosses, not companies. Perception is Reality. Some days you may hate your boss and your job. You may find yourself chatting with peers about how things should be done differently in your organization. These peers may be aligned with your boss, and want to see you fired. The fact is that you need to: Own Your Relationship With Your Boss, and make your boss shine. The faster you understand this concept, the faster you can get promoted.

I was a part of an acquisition, in one point of my career. I unwillingly had to report a peer, after the acquisition, who was with the company for twenty years. He was the entire opposite of my personality and a direct polar opposite in many ways. I am a bit of a challenge as you may be able to tell. I am a fast –paced, results-oriented, hyper, executive recruiter. It was not my new manager's dream to inherit a ball of fire as a new member of his team. It was my first experience knowing that you could possibly outperform a manager and put yourself in danger of being fired. I always assumed that my outstanding results would keep a person employed. My success may have actually threatened my peer, who was now may boss. My boss may have been threatened by my strong relationships with the senior leadership teams. I may have brought in too many innovative diversity programs, and challenged the norm of recruiting at the company. My new boss was kind enough, and welcoming enough to say to me that he could fire me if he did not like my color of shoes. He informed me that Pennsylvania is an “at will” state. In short, I saw how corporate politics works from the inside. The experiences made me stronger and grow into a fireball of global recruiting, outpacing my “Boss” in many ways. Sometimes you decide to make career changes, and sometimes the job universe changes your job, without your permission, so you can grow. Some managers actually fear people who are different. These gatekeepers, known as bosses, are critical to your job success.

Later in my career, I had an amazing manager. His favorite saying was, “How Can I Help?” He constantly took barriers away and sang my praises. He forgave my flaws and focused on my strengths, and he made sure everyone he managed did the same. He never managed with anger, or too much focus on the mistakes, but focused on forward momentum. I would hope that you are all as lucky to encounter an amazing and inspiring leader at some point in your career.

“Do or do not, there is no try." This is my favorite quote from Yoda. You need to manage and own your relationship with your boss, or move on to a new career. It will not get better. You need to be seen as a magnetic employee of choice, and a valued employee. To stay employed and to get promoted, you need to be on the "High Performers" list. You will not be able to get on that list without your manager's buy in. Create the relationship you are looking for and get the results you need with the gatekeeper to your career. My Job Tool for today is to OWN THE RELATIONSHIP. Uncover this critical barrier to future promotion.

No one has more vested interest in the success of your relationship with your boss than you do. It is time to understand the political circles. Stop making excuses. Take the time to listen, be open to change, and become an employee of choice. If you are not an active part of your bosses dream, you may be secretly on your way out of your current company, whether you want to be or not.

This wild bronco of an employee is humbled when I look back and smile, and know how hard I was to manage at some parts in my career. Success comes to those who partner with bosses, and control their emotions. Not everything needs to be said at that moment. Sometimes it is best to sleep on comments and negative feedback.

“It is a common experience that a problem difficult at night is resolved in the morning after the committee of sleep has worked on it.”

― John Steinbeck, Sweet Thursday

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