and once more it's dawning...

...that this unfeasibly tiny puppy at my feet has a hold on my heart as well as my shoe. I couldn't be more delighted that she successfully woke me and told me she needed to go out to go to the loo. It's my fourth night of broken sleep, but I was the same with my human baby 20 years ago. I was never in the 'leave them to cry' camp no matter what the gurus were saying.

I always assume that little creatures of any species wouldn't just waste energy making a noise, they are usually trying to tell us something.

Since November I have been working at Tailwise.com and have had the huge joy and privilege of talking to people at a hugely emotional point in their lives.

Planning to add a puppy is massively life changing. I am the CDO, probably a unique role in tech start ups. But I take my Chief Dog Officer role very seriously. I thought I'd spend most of my days bursting impulse bubbles for those in the Disney phase of puppy lust. But no, those people attracted to Tailwise seem really worldly wise.

Those with raging puppy fever just clicked and bought puppies online from those whose idea of a good grilling is to ask 'how are you going to pay?'

I was obviously prone to infection, the fact I lasted so long without succumbing is somewhat remarkable.

I have been a multiple dog owner for most of my life. I am obviously a relapsing dogaholic. This time it was the sad spaniel eyes that locked in - that and the breeder saying that this one was reduced because she was damaged.

Her little tail was broken - it was assumed by her mum - during a difficult birth. She was born breach and mum must have tugged that little tail very hard. There was no external injury, but the bone must have become separated. It will hang limp while the rest of the tail is alert - like a wind sock on a very still day. But when this tiny precious Cocker is even slightly pleased, the dead half tail is flung around as if performing a Mexican wave.

And, while even the most strident human adoption activist is unlikely to disparage a pregnant friend at their own baby shower, dog folk love to virtue shame each other.

We've all heard the mantra "Adopt Don't Shop". I love rescue dogs, Betty is the most gorgeous dog anyone has ever met as was Tess, now sadly departed.

I reacted to one round of unfriendly fire with a new phrase, "Adopt Don't Strop". There is more than one way to make the dog world better.

I came up with an analogy to try to explain my belief that we can't rescue our way out of bad bulk breeding you need to change the system. If the good capable people rescue dogs and leave the money-orientated puppy farmers to breed and sell to novice folk unaware of the difficulty level of housetraining a dog that has lived in a shed... well it's never going to stop is it?

Dogs will keep going from shed to online advert, to first time buyer often rejected by rescue, back online when they can't cope but want to get some of their dosh back, to buyer thinking they've got a bargain, back to online for slightly less money, to rescue after the sell by date has long gone, to rescue with a now somewhat damaged dog on top of a poor start.

Ready for capable experienced dog folks to try to repair dogs that have been badly let down by the system.

Or you could take the experienced, capable dog people and their much loved dogs, do everything possible to make the next generation happy, healthy and prepped for being a pet and cut out all those damaging ricochet homes and support the novice owner through the early weeks and set them up for a lifetime of success. Encourage everyone to buy from a breeder invested in keeping dogs out of rescue and soon those breeding in sheds will start selling something more suitable, like sheds.

But what do I know, when I look into my puppy dog's eyes my brain turns to mush - but I know I want to make every pup safe. For them to go from a loving home - where mum has a life outside of reproduction - to a loving new home that understands a dog has needs and they will build on the good foundations to make it work.

Dogs should be family, not commodity. Those that breed dogs well are not the problem, they will actually form part of the solution.