OLD You vs. NEW You (How to build Self-Efficacy ??)

Hey everyone!

While reading this, I invite you to take a moment and acknowledge how far you’ve come in the past 3–5 years.

Why?

Because when you appreciate your progress, you build self-efficacy — the belief that you’re a capable human being, who can set and achieve goals.

In turn, that builds your self-confidence.

It's simple. It's powerful. Yet most of us do the exact OPPOSITE — we forget our wins, and fixate on our losses.

Take public speaking...

You quickly forget the dozens of times you presented well — but that one time you messed up the slides? That scene gets stuck in your head, on repeat, for months!

Your talk gets positive feedback from 99% of people in the room — but one person says something critical, and you feel like a complete failure.

This is caused by our in-built “negativity bias” — an old survival mechanism that makes us pay MORE attention to what goes wrong, vs. what goes right.

If you’re not careful, it’ll have you feeling like you’ve made no progress at all... ??

10 years ago, the old me was:

• Riddled with nerves.
• Fearing people’s judgement
• Overwhelmed with adrenaline.
• Shuffling about on my feet.
• Speaking too fast (and with, erm, you know, fillers.)

Stepping into a room full of people felt like going into battle with my own nervous-system. I knew what to say — but it didn’t matter.

The moment all eyes were on me, my subconscious flipped the ‘fight-flight-freeze’ switch. I felt frustrated and helpless to change things.

Nowadays, I feel very different:

• Perfectly calm.
• Excited to connect.
• My mind focused.
• Moving with purpose.
• Speaking with passion, pauses, and melody.

I get to enjoy the experience of addressing an audience, and delivering as much value as I possibly can.

Just as well, too. I'm paid to speak to audiences, and train teams... it'd be a nightmare if I still had all those nerves!

But after each challenge, I’ll still make a point of:

A. Analysing where I can improve further. B. Appreciating how far I’ve come.

So, what does your “back then” vs. “right now” look like?

What big wins do you deserve to remember more often?

And what big achievements are you planning next?

Take that minute for yourself, and make some notes.

PS. If part of your vision involves speaking with confidence, it’s time we had a chat. Things are getting busy inside Charisma Club, and we can only take on a handful more people in 2024.

To your public speaking success,

Ed