Is it okay to cry at work?

Is it okay to cry at work?

This is an age-old question. What do you think?

I’ll share my perspective below.

But first, let me provide some context for this question.

A client told me that she was avoiding one of her colleagues at work.

She explained that she had some conflict with this person and felt very betrayed.

She was so afraid that she would cry if she addressed the issue that she avoided this person altogether.

It is now two years later, and her relationship with this colleague has become toxic.

So, I asked her, “What’s the reason that you fear crying at work?”

She explained that others would view her as unprofessional or immature.

Do you think this perspective is true?

I searched my mind for the times in my career when I cried at work.

• I cried the first time I got a huge increase in my sales targets and felt totally overwhelmed.
• I cried after my very aggressive boss yelled at me for not meeting her unrealistic expectations.
• I cried once when a very senior internal client was extremely rude to me and told me that my project was a waste of his time.
• I cried (or rather bawled hysterically) when I found out that my best friend died of cancer when I was 28. Yes, I got the call just as I arrived at the office.

As I reflect on these situations (and there are probably more), I feel like my emotional response was valid.

The way you feel is never wrong.

Sadness, frustration, anger, embarrassment or any other reasons for tears are all valid human emotions.

There are no “good” or “bad” emotions.

Emotions are your personal GPS system.

They help you to understand what you are feeling.

Your emotional awareness helps you to know what you need, want or don’t want.

By understanding your emotions and emotional reactions (the core of emotional intelligence), you can take positive action to enhance your relationships or resolve an issue.

Just imagine if, two years ago, my client took her colleague out for a coffee.

Just imagine if she cried, spoke her truth and shared her feelings openly.

Today, she would have a close, trusted friend instead of a dysfunctional, toxic relationship.

So, it is my opinion that crying or showing emotions at work is 100% okay.

Being vulnerable and transparent in your relationships always leads to more trust.

If someone actually thought you were unprofessional when authentically showing emotion, well, they need an education on the benefits of emotional intelligence!

So, it is my opinion that it is very “old school” to think that crying at work is unprofessional.

You are human first…and then an employee.

Be yourself.

And if you need to cry…cry!