Oh how I hated learning as a kid

To some, the joy of learning and childhood go hand in hand. Sadly my childhood was not like that.

I remember "studying" by sitting on my bed with a book and then conveniently passing out on more than a few occasions. The next morning I would scramble to shower and eat breakfast before leaving the house, knowing full well that I had not completed my reading or assignments from the previous night. I got good at convincing myself that I was able to bullshit - and that did NOT result in good grades in most classes.

In my junior year of high school, I finally realized how to enjoy learning. My parents hired a delightfully brilliant older Ukrainian man named Anatoly who would come to my house once or twice a week by bus. He spoke in thick, accented Russian and had an odd sense of humor compounded by our 60+ year age difference and clearly contrasting cultural upbringings. He was also a brilliant mathematician who could explain geometry, trigonometry and calculus in clear English despite not being able to converse about mundane subjects like the weather or pop culture. We worked together week until the end of high school and my math grades in my last two years of high school reflected that as I began to grasp concepts, recognize problems and then apply this recognition and recall to solve them.

This experience is fresh in my mind because for the last few weeks, I have spent every night from 8 PM - 12:30 AM in my living room cradling my five-week old son. Because I can't do much, I usually spend the time watching Hulu or Netflix. When I have breaks, I put him down so I can catch up on a couple emails or browse around on the internet to buy something on Amazon or plan a trip for later in the year. But when I finish watching him and my wife takes over for the late night shift, I head off to bed carrying a few books excited that I have even a few minutes to read. Right now, I have three:

• Home Body, by Joanna Gaines. Because we are hoping to buy our home in the next six months and watching many episodes of Fixer Upper, House Hunters, Love It of List It, and Property Brothers has me thinking about what kind of home I want to live in. And for the life of me, I have been obsessed with wainscoting and crown molding for the last year and I cannot explain why. Reading about design styles, materials, types of lighting fixtures, and the many myriads of interior design terms has me compelled.

• A Man and His Watch, by Matt Hranek. I'm a watch guy. Have been since I was 9 years old and I forced my Dad to buy me an alligator strap-clad pearl faced knock off on the streets of New York's Chinatown. I saw this book online and decided I wanted to see what kinds of watches interesting people (like JFK, Sir Edmund Hillary, and James Bond) wear. Time is a construct humanity created to track the passage of events and life and watches represent an order to chaos that was hard for many to have as recently as two hundred years ago. So for me, I like hearing about these interesting people…and their timepieces. 

• And finally, The Dim Sum Field Guide, by Carolyn Phillips. My sister Aimee knows how much of a foodie I am. And being Chinese American (but more American, these days), I'm sometimes unable to recall what something is when we have dim sum. So reading about the various steamed, fried, or baked components and about how the chicken skin is crispy or the pork is braised allows me to relive delicious memories and also better understand what I plan to eat, and what I can share with my friends and family.

As I was walking into my home office to put some other books away, I bent over to see the row of textbooks I got while in college - some of which I either never or barely opened. Topics like "Practical Management Science" or "Corporate Valuation." I picked them both up and spend ten minutes perusing the contents. Sections on optimization in Excel and forward-looking multiples. For a moment, I was filled with regret, but not about the topics themselves. Why didn't I open these books? Why didn't I thoroughly commit myself to learning then? Was it laziness? Fear? How come? Why why why?

I don't have answers to those questions. But I do have some perspective on learning now that I wish I had during business school, during undergrad, during my CFA study process (p.s. never do that), and even back to my high school days.

• Build the foundation. You need just enough familiarity or comfort to keep trying something again or add more skills. Don’t quit soccer after the first week just because you can't dribble well. And don't let people who depend on you quit just when the going gets tough. That's the perfect positioning to conquer self-doubt and sew the seeds for major lessons.
• Figure out what you want to learn about. Some things we learn in life because of biology. My breathing, my ability to visually track objects, and my recognition of the spoken language all came thanks to what I was born with and what my parents helped me grow. But what I studied and continue to study are things that I want to learn about. What is that for me? I built a list and looked at which topics got me excited. Things about organizational behavior, travel, personal development, food, and self-help books. I really love A-Z guides that structure learning by foundational elements and then slide into advanced topics. Those topics informed my "To Learn" list that I wrote about earlier this year.
• Your worst enemy (and greatest ally) is inertia. Much like going to the gym or seeing the doctor after many years, the hardest thing can sometimes be just going or doing it for the first time. Push that rock to the top of the hill, then let it roll. One workout becomes two and two becomes three. Read a short book on humorous poems or a dummies guide to cooking. Take a Masterclass online or a lesson LinkedIn Learning. Just. Go. Do. Something.

My manager likes telling my teammates and I about the virtues of being a polymath, that is someone who has expertise in a variety of subject areas (see: Renaissance man/woman, man/woman of many talents. And I agree. People who know something about a few things (hint: not ALL things) are interesting, compelling, and people that others want to talk to.

I have found a profound joy in learning about new things. Languages, topics, things for my job, things for our home. So if you hated learning or never found joy in learning as a kid, try it out. Get out there and learn something new - ANYTHING new. Take opposite arguments and make them you own, then go read. Or watch. Or discuss. Whatever you do, get to love the process of learning.