Office Jargon for Grads: What is said VS. What is really meant
Enes Champo
Digital Communications Product Design (web) at United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA)
As a fresh graduate out of uni, the office environment can seem like a daunting place; new meeting etiquette, balancing priorities and shrilling deadlines not to mention new office lingo that can be very confusing. It doesn’t help that often what people say isn’t what they mean.
It took me a while, but I think I’ve finally cracked the code to some of this office jargon:
THEY SAY: “I’m happy to…”
IT MEANS: “Cool, I’ll do It if I have to. Just don’t give me too much work”
THEY SAY: “We need a rehash of this work”
IT MEANS: “The first draft was rubbish, do it again”
THEY SAY: “I’m going to scope it out”
IT MEANS: “I have no idea what I’m doing. I’m going to do a Google search. Hopefully that will help.”
TERM: Away day
MEANING: A day out of the office where you get to use lots of sticky notes and coloured pens and drink fancy coffee
TERM: Team building day
MEANING: ditto above (plus awkward ice-breakers)
THEY SAY: “I’m tendering my resignation”
IT MEANS: bye Felicia!
THEY SAY: “Can I borrow you for a sec?”
IT MEANS: This is the work equivalent to the dreaded “we need to talk” conversation in relationships. Approach with caution.
THEY SAY “Keep me in the loop”
IT MEANS: “CC me in. I may or may not read these messages.”
THEY SAY “Can you shed some light on this?”
IT MEANS: “What you said made absolutely no sense to me”
THEY SAY: “Let me know…”
IT MEANS: “I’m going to leave it up to you to chase me”
THEY SAY: “We need to hit the ground
running”
IT MEANS: “This project is going to need speed, accuracy, drive ingenuity and quite possibly your kidneys too.”
THEY SAY: “All hands on deck to give 110%”
IT MEANS: ditto above
THEY SAY: “A gentle reminder…”
IT MEANS: NB. This is NOT a gentle reminder
TERM: Hot desking
DEFINITION: the desk sharing policy that everyone ignores
Great, I think you should be up to speed now. Go forth and use wisely!
Any office jargon or phrases that you think I’ve missed out? Post them below with their real intended meaning.
Senior Program Manager at United Hospital Fund of New York
7 年This is hilarious!
Senior Consultant Engineer at RPS
7 年Yay!