Office Animals

The office is a peculiar ecosystem, a concrete jungle teeming with creatures more complex than any found in a wildlife national park. There is the Alpha Predator, the office dictator, who believes they are the apex of the corporate food chain. With a keen eye for vulnerability, they stalk the cubicles and their prey (the unsuspecting employees).

Then there is the office gossip, a mischievous monkey, ever vigilant for juicy tidbits. They swing from cubicle to cubicle. Beware their charm, for beneath their friendship lies a venomous tongue.

The office vampire, a creature of the night (or at least of endless meetings), drains the life force from its colleagues. With a desire for PowerPoint presentations that could induce a coma, they suck the energy from the room. Avoid eye contact at all costs.

And let us not forget the office peacock, a creature of unparalleled self-importance. With feathers ruffled and ego inflated, they strut around the office, convinced of their own brilliance. Their calls echo through the cubicles, a noise of self-promotion.

Surviving this jungle requires a combination of cunning, resilience, and a healthy dose of humor. Develop a thick skin, ignore the drama, and master the art of office diplomacy. Remember, you are not alone. We are all just trying to make it through the day without being eaten alive.

But amidst the chaos, there are also hidden gems… the office plants, quietly producing oxygen and providing a much-needed touch of green. The office philosopher, offering wisdom and perspective, and the office comedian, whose laughter can brighten even the darkest of days.

So, next time you find yourself feeling like prey in a corporate jungle, take a deep breath, channel your inner survivalist, and remember that you are stronger than you think. And if all else fails, there is always the option of bringing in a real lion to scare everyone straight.

Just kidding (mostly).