Off to Hogwarts

Before Covid (BC) I spent my life in a whirlwind of packing, airport lounges, flights and intense weeks of client meetings before rushing back to Melbourne to collect my gorgeous girls who I co-parent week on, week off, with their Dad.

When Covid hit we made the joint decision for me to relocate with the girls to NZ.  I would have the girls for the whole of Term 2, given the advice that school would be delivered remotely for the term.  Olivia (14) and Sophie (10) were totally up for living in a different country:

‘Imagine Mum, when people ask you what you did in the 2020 pandemic and we say we moved countries! When else would we get to do this and not have to miss school or friends, because we aren’t allowed to see them anyway!’

So that’s exactly what we did. 

But then things started to get crazy.  The Victorian Government announced that face to face schooling would be returning on 9 June. Suddenly we found ourselves on the wrong side of the Trans-Tasman bubble for school. Uh-oh.  Sophie’s school were happy to support ongoing remote schooling til the end of term but Olivia’s wouldn’t.

What to do?

Olivia declared that she wanted to go to boarding school (another adventure!). For those of you who know Olivia, you will be able to imagine her stating this as clear as a bell.  Having just turned 14 she towers over me, with her cheeky grin, and eyes sparkling with fierce intelligence.  Funny, charming, independent and sassy, with gorgeous red hair that just adds to her height.  

So we made a call to the boarding school on Monday and had an interview with the headmaster on Tuesday.

It was a really interesting experience for me to step outside of my business world, and meet the headmaster. I meet lots of impressive people in my role, and I have to say, he nailed it.  He began by talking about the difference between being a day student and a border. A day student does the work and gets tested for it, but for the boarders, the testing is done up front. The staff look for kindness, humility, the ability to live with others -  and then they test the learning. 

I particularly liked the way he spoke about the peaks and troughs that would happen through Olivia’s time at the school. He suggested making two columns, one that says “I’m glad I did”  rather than ‘I wish that I had’.  Don’t leave room for regrets, life is about opportunities, try everything, be present and get involved. I like to think he was a little bit impressed when Olivia said ‘You're talking about a growth mindset”. So she has been listening to me?? Or potentially just overhearing a lot of work from home Zoom calls!

Finally the headmaster imparted the last piece of his advice for the day; he said: ‘if you are accepted here, strive for excellence rather than perfection. You’ll never achieve perfection, but excellence you should always work towards. It’s about continuous improvement, not an end game.’ I thought to myself, I’m so going to book this guy to talk to our team.  

My gorgeously brave 14 year old started boarding school the very next day.   

I needed to take a big deep breath as she gave me a hug ‘Love you Mum, bye, you can go now’. The Matron and House Mistress kindly but efficiently guided me away from her dorm room and new room mate, down the stairs and outside.  Gulp.  

We talk about being able to pivot in business, well, I was given the masterclass in pivoting by my daughter, Olivia.

Taking it all in her stride, she viewed it as her own ticket to Hogwarts. While there wasn’t time for a trip to Diagon Alley, the uniform fitting was right up there. We didn’t need to purchase an owl or a cauldron, but multiple uniforms - a formal uniform, a day uniform, sports kit and so on... Olivia was not at all pleased about the compulsory mid-calf skirt length (and the fact they don’t have trousers for girls, WTF Mum!).

So while the headmaster didn’t look anything like Dumbledore, he certainly had the same traits of wisdom. Which is probably lucky given Olivia has Harry’s glasses, Ron’s hair colour and Hermione’s intelligence! Almost three weeks in she is having a ball, working beyond her year level, playing sport, making friends, and learning how to budget her weekly allowance (MUM, food is SO expensive!) oh and throw in a few earthquakes to boot (quite possibly the most hilarious text messages ever).  

Someone said to me not long ago, as parents we are custodians, not owners of our children.  We are lucky to have them for as long as we do, and I am damn lucky to have this kid. I miss her face, but I am so extraordinarily proud.