"The nurses are not your friends but a bunch of demons"

“Why are nurses and midwives such horrible people? Why are they so miserable?” This is the repeat statement I have heard five times this week. It was uttered by a very close friend today and his words “they treat me like I’m not there” pierced my heart. Does it get any worse than that?

I totally understand we (nurses and midwives) are always working under so much pressure. We are constantly overworked and understaffed. We work long hours with no break. Many of us have over stretched our bladders because we barely have a second to take a break for fear of our women delivering or what seemed like a normal delivery becomes and an emergency. We spend the next few hours shuttling between the operating room (OR), Intensive care unit (ICU), Neonatal Unit (NNU) and the blood bank (all worst-case scenarios of course) while trying to complete our documentation and support the family. We certainly do not have time for a cup of tea or a glance in the mirror to notice our lips are chapped due to lack of oral hydration ten hours into the shift.

However, is this a reason for the terrible attitudes? The rude and sarcastic comments such as “was I there when you were enjoying?” or the nonchalant “I’m just here to get paid” vibes? A resounding NO!!!!

As midwives, we provide care for women and their birthing partners at crucial and sensitive moments in their lives. This is the time to be nice (if that is not your default setting), empathetic to their needs and understanding of their pain.

YES, we all know labour is going to be painful, but nothing beats that feeling of an amazing support system. Some women have a long latent phase (early labour) and are usually disheartened by the time they are in active labour. We need to give continuous encouragement and empower our women. Especially at the moments when most women feel they cannot continue.

Despite the sub-optimal working conditions, we need to provide our best care ever!

They may forget what you said — but they will never forget how you made them feel.

—Carl W. Buehner

We know better, let's do better!