Now’s The Time for a Tribute

“The hospital told the kids to come and say goodbye.” This was the text message my mom sent me last Friday. My uncle has been fighting for his life after complications from COVID and he took a turn for the worse.

When I grieve, I need to write. I wrote a eulogy for my uncle. I reflected on who he was, how he lived, and the contributions he made. I shared it with a few people who are close to me and they responded with “beautiful” “I cried” and “I feel like I truly know your uncle.”

“He’s now stable and while a long journey ahead, the doctor is optimistic about his recovery.” I received this text message from my mom later the next day. I couldn’t be more joyful to learn that miraculously my uncle was improving. It looks promising that I can read him the eulogy I wrote. He can hear how I viewed him and memorialized his legacy.

I can’t shake the thought that I never communicated the items in the eulogy to my uncle when he was vibrant and healthy. It’s only after I learned that he may be meeting his maker did I put into words my admiration for this individual. Why? It seems backwards.

In vision planning exercises we are asked to write our own eulogies. We are coached to author what we want someone to say about us and how we want to be remembered. It can be uncomfortable at first, however once you get rolling it can be empowering to write everything we want the future version of ourselves to be remembered as. It sets a path for what we may need to change now to fully live out the desired future state.

I am beginning a new path – a change to the normal sequence of events. I am not going to wait and deliver a tribute when the person can’t physically hear it. I desire to begin writing and delivering them now. I want individuals to clearly hear how they’ve made an impact on me and others.

Will you join me in giving tributes now? Your family members, your friends, your business colleagues – they all deserve to have specific and timely feedback on how you view them and their contributions. Don’t wait. Start with a few words in your next conversation, a text message, an email. Make it a ritual. You will give gifts with your words.

In my eulogy, I want to be remembered as a person who didn’t wait to tell those around her the impact they had on her life.