Nothing happens to you, it happens for you

A great teacher once told me: “Nothing happens to you, it happens for you” and I use this sentence a lot with my mentees and my close circle. These couple words changed my entire perspective in life and I thought it’s worth sharing as I truly believe someone will benefit from it.

When you are in negative mindset or someone triggers you, be grateful. As this very specific event happens for a reason and it happens for you. Look for the nugget within the event that triggered you. Remember that they say "misery loves company" but change your perspective and hear that sentence as "misery wants company". By that hear what your misery tells you - sit down with it (no distractions), listen to it intently to find the nugget within. There is nothing out there, it's all within you.

If above doesn't make sense, let me share a story about a monk:

"A monk decides to meditate alone, away from his monastery. He takes his boat out to the middle of the lake, moors it there, closes his eyes and begins his meditation. After a few hours of undisturbed silence, he suddenly feels the bump of another boat colliding with his own. 

With his eyes still closed, he senses his anger rising, and by the time he opens his eyes, he is ready to scream at the boatman who dared disturb his meditation. But when he opens his eyes, he sees it’s an empty boat that had probably got untethered and floated to the middle of the lake. 

At that moment, the monk achieves self-realization, and understands that the anger is within him; it merely needs the bump of an external object to provoke it out of him. From then on, whenever he comes across someone who irritates him or provokes him to anger, he reminds himself, “The other person is merely an empty boat. The anger is within me.”

Remember, nothing happens to you, it happens for you...