North Korea wins bid for Boeing Space, pledges to reduce bureaucracy and cronyism
PYONGYANG - In a dramatic turn of events at the recent auction of Boeing Space assets in order to rescue the aerospace giant after decades of financialization, North Korea has stepped in with the winning bid. In a deal led by Kim Jong Un himself, both parties celebrate how their combined strengths can secure a win-win for the future.
"Boeing had a Space company built by bankers, we had a Space engineers and no bank. This is a heavenly match blessed by Kim Jong Il from his celestial palace in the sky", explains a spokesperson for the Workers Party Of Korea. "Our strengths overlap in many fields, for example we both excel at building one-way spacecraft. What's more, we both operate a very lean teams. While theirs is lean on engineer headcount, ours is lean on BMI."
The enthusiasm of the Pyongyang State Affairs M&A team is evident, backed by an elaborate parade in the Kim II Sung Square and special news reports on state television. Nevertheless in a press release from the closest embassy [in Havana, Cuba] from where the deal was managed, a more critical glimpse of the near future strategy for Boeing Space is given. "We believe career paths in a technology company should not necessarily pass through posts in Regulatory Affairs, nor end in Finance" and "We will strive for development of spacecraft that can return to earth without support from SpaceX". The new leadership also expresses the desire to put the first Korean on the moon before 2030 and complete the evacuation of the last evil capitalist pig no later than 2045.
We'll keep a close watch on these exciting developments.
#Space #Politburo
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