The Non-Writer's Guide to Writing

"I'm not a real writer."

I was thinking about this sentence and how many times I've said it. How many times I've heard it. In the past week alone, I've heard at least half a dozen people disclose that they were not a writer, or that they were not good with words. I've received dozens of comments on my writing or my words via work, social media, text, and heart to heart. And it has made me wonder why so many of us disqualify ourselves from things that don't actually have any qualifiers.

I've always had an affinity for words, but somewhere in recent years, it became my brand. "Send your words to Sarah." I won't lie, I kind of love it. There are few things in life more satisfying than finding the perfect arrangement of letters to articulate a sentiment that actually lands.

I've been paid to write since my early 20s- so I am technically a professional writer. But can I share something?

I barely passed English lit in high school and college. In fact, I had both high school teachers and college professors tell me that I couldn't write. One even told me that I should quit writing alltogether- I was clearly never going to get it, I was never going to be a writer.

I think they meant it as an encouragement, suggesting I could find an alternative livelihood and still be ok. It crushed me though. I loved writing.

To this day, I cannot tell you how to properly write an AP paper. I cannot tell you the difference between APA and MLA. I still mistakingly use passive instead of active voice, I use way too many commas, I run-on my sentences, I use weird words that people have to look up, and I have a mildly inappropriate love for semicolons; all of these violate the laws of writing, but here we are, communicating.

The first time I was told that I was not a writer, I was 17. I consistently failed writing assignments because I just didn't get it, but I was also almost always chosen as the class favorite to read outloud. This presented a dilemma to me as a writer- did I really want to learn how to write in AP formatting to please some old guy on a college board? Or did I want to write for my peers- people who would laugh and engage and chat about it with me afterwards? What if becoming a good writer, in fact was making me a bad writer?

I did try my best to learn the appropriate formatting. I wanted to pass the AP test, I wanted to show my parents an A, and get into a good college. But I never really succeeded. I began to believe that good writing was beyond my academic capabilities, and I just wasn't a writer. Then we were assigned to read 'Catcher in the Rye', and everything changed.

I loved it. The conversational tone, the profanities, the ignorance of it all. I asked my teacher why we were studying this text as a classic, when it didn't honor any of the literary laws we were told must exist for worthwhile writing. I wasn't trying to be a smart-ass, I just genuinely wanted to know why we were now learning and praising something that had been demonized the whole first semester.

She had no response for me other than it was important to study different kinds of work. But if that was true... couldn't there be different kinds of writers? I took the initiative to reach out to actual writers, not English teachers, to read their work and ask for feedback on my writing. Most were very friendly and helpful. I began to shift my mindset from "I'm not a real writer" to "I am becoming a writer." And eventually realized, if I am writing... I am a writer. I may not be a good writer, or a published writer. But I am in fact a writer. I continued this in college when I once again had professors telling me that my writing was "jr high at best", and encouraging me to rethink my major.

I believe in education. I believe in sentence structure and grammar and understanding the rules. And I believe it's important to flex different writing muscles. But I also believe that having a unique style- a brand- is what sets you apart and makes you interesting. And I believe half of why we learn the rules is so that we can break them.

There is no black and white when it comes to communication. To think that there is one strict way to communicate a sentence is beyond ignorant in my opinion. There are thousands if not millions of cultures, styles, lenses, and worldviews- all of which go into brokering understanding.

So what do we do with this? When you write something, ask the following:

Why am I writing this? Is it to check a box, to prove an understanding of a format, or to communicate a thought? Start with your primary objective.

Who am I writing to? Am I writing to a teacher, a reader, a client, a colleague? What matters to them? What information do they need to know? Sometimes you need to write to a specific audience. Sometimes you need to write to yourself, and trust it will find the right audience. Discernment is vital to the pen.

Who is critiquing me? If you are writing for a company or a brand or some sort of business context, you probably need to listen to the critique of the reviewer. Chances are the criticisms have to do with being in line with their brand voice, or their company standards. If you are writing for someone else, it's imperative you can think like someone else. But if you're writing a book or a blog and you get a troll who says "This is boring and I hate this"... maybe that's just not your audience, and you can send them on their way.

There is no rule that you have to write for someone else. It's always ok to write just because you like writing. I'm often my own best audience.

Bonus tips:

Write something you would want to read. Don't overthink it. If you are bored, your reader will probably also be bored. Even if you are writing something technical, there are ways to lighten the language and keep it more engaging.

Keep it simple. Best practices says to keep all writing at a 4th grade level. I don't know if I always adhere to that (ok, I never adhere to that- because I'm addicted to using fancy vernacular like 'adhere'). But amongst the yummy words, make sure it's easy to understand. Can the reader walk away knowing exactly what it is you are telling them, and what you want them to do with that information?

Find critique elsewhere. I'm a decent editor for others' work. But I have submitted papers with glaringly obvious errors that I have proofread 100 times. I believe it is physically impossible to proof ones own writing. Before you publish anything, run it by an editor. Maybe two. There should always be at least two sets of eyeballs before anything formal is published in business.

Know what kind of writer you are. While I could argue that a good writer can write anything, I also believe we are more and less inclined to certain styles. Someone who is a very good copywriter may not be a great long-form content writer. A technical writer may struggle to keep it conversational. And a social media writer may struggle to string together a book. Take the time to understand your style and strengths, and then challenge yourself to try new styles.

Find your voice. It's not really about being a good writer. It's about being a good communicator. That doesn't come from knowing grammar rules, it comes from knowing yourself, and understanding others. If you want to be a good writer, spend a little time brushing up on sentence structure, but a lot more time learning empathy, perspective, listening skills, and becoming a person who has worthwhile things to say.

What makes me a writer? I write. That's it. What would you add to this list?