This is non-negotiable

CAUGHT OUR EYE

Reading for the school pick-up line.

Defining your all

Can you have it all? Do you even want it all? Experts in this article from Parents on defining ambition say that’s up to you to decide. Ambition is about meeting your desires - goals you’re reaching toward and the things you hold as valuable, important and meaningful (not anyone else’s). A sense of control and agency in your own life.?

Dr. Sophie Brock, Ph.D., a motherhood studies sociologist says, “It isn’t ambition itself that is problematic for us [as mothers]; it’s what we’re being ambitious about, where our ambition is directed and why.” [No surprise that our most popular episode is on redefining ambition.]

Defining ambition starts by realizing you matter. Let go of the conditioning to put our needs last. Then, listen to what makes you feel good and in control vs. what depletes you. Finally, consider what supports you have in place to allow space to work towards your personal goals.?

Success comes from defining your ambition over and over. It will change.?

You cannot compartmentalize your life

A recent article from The Washington Post says how you feel about your job affects how well you parent your kids(!) The first year of your child’s life is especially important and determines the quality of their cognitive, social and mental health outcomes up to six years. Oof.?

Parents who struggle in their work lives with stress, depletion, feelings of numbness tend to be more reactive and withdrawn. It’s easy to understand why.

So, aside from doing some inner work to define ambition and what matters to you (see above), the action items for companies revolve around integrating work and family. We’ve all learned by now that it’s impossible to compartmentalize our lives, and who the hell wants to.?

Quote we’re crushing on this week:

“There are different seasons in motherhood. Some swallow you up and are all consuming. Some allow more time for you. Some are hard. Some are hard to say bye to. Some test you. Some help you grow. Some make you feel like you are losing yourself. Some give opportunity to come home to yourself. Motherhood is full of seasons, don’t get discouraged by yours.” @YouTheMother (Instagram)

THIS WEEK’S EPISODE: The Non-Negotiables of Parenting

What we’re currently chatting about on Working Mom Hour.

Sometimes, hearing the worst advice is the best thing that will ever happen to us. For Kelly Mendez-Scheib, SPHR, SHRM-SCP, RCC , Chief People Officer at Crunchbase , a former employer once told her, “When you’re here, you’re an employee, and when you’re at home, you’re a mother.”

Rightfully ignoring this remark, Kelly set out to create a family-friendly workplace, one that honors the non-negotiables of parenting. As a parent of five and foster mom, she tells us her emotional story of how she built her family in tandem with her career, and inspires women to rewrite their self-limiting beliefs.

Show bombs:?

(23:49) We're bigger than the feelings.

(34:57) I've given up the idea that I'm gonna be the mom to make a Halloween costume.

(35:30) I'm on my own journey. I'm not on anyone else's journey.

ON OUR MINDS

Healing words I heard this week:

“Our kids need breaks from us too.” ~ Madeline Caldwell

Am I ready to be a sports mom?

I didn’t play sports as a kid. I tried. The athletic gene skipped right over me and went to my two younger sisters. They both played lacrosse in college. This spring season, Ellie earned a spot in competitive lacrosse and basketball leagues. She will be practicing five nights a week and games/tournaments will take over our coveted weekends.?

Don’t get me wrong, I am so f’ing proud of her. Ellie had her butt in a cold plunge every day the week of tryouts. She wanted it.

And now, I need to learn how to be a sports mom. What do I need to sit on the sidelines in unfortunate weather? What should I be prepared for when we travel to tournaments? Will I miss my weekends as much as I’m preemptively grieving them? And am I ready for all the car magnets? Help! ~ Erica Mechlinski

Friendship is one of the most rewarding relationships we can build in life, but why does it hit roadblocks?

Our podcast guest, Dr. Miriam Kirmayer was on a recent episode of the top-rated Call Her Daddy podcast with host Alex Cooper. Together, they discuss navigating friendship throughout the many phases of life, and how to communicate through conflict. Tune in here for this important conversation!?

~ Marla Rose Clendenin

See you next week!?

P.S. Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode, and kindly review the podcast on Apple Podcasts so we can reach more working moms. We always want to hear your thoughts, concerns, questions or guest suggestions – email [email protected].?

Find us on Instagram:

@WorkingMomHour

@EMechlinski

@MadsCaldwell

@MarlaRosie