No

?? As babies, we learn how to say "NO!" around 15-18 months.

? We usually don't learn how to say "YES!" till about 18-24 months.

This is because

1?? "NO!" (at least in English) is easier to pronounce than "YES!" and

2?? Developmentally we learn to assert independence before we learn about social affirmation.

?? And yet, even though "NO!" comes first - as we get older - saying "NO!" sometimes gets a bad rap.

?? Here are three reasons you might want more "NO" in your life:

1)?? NO = SAFE

Early on, we're conditioned to associate "NO!" with with safety.

??? "Hello there! I'm a stranger. Would you like some candy?" ? "NO!"

?? "I wonder if that stove is burning hot with the power of a thousand suns. I'm going to touch it." ? "NO!"

?? "I'm going to jump off this bridge. Care to join me?" ? "NO!"

?? Anytime we can get a "NO!" out of them it's going to make them feel safer; anytime we say "NO!" it's going to make us feel safer.

2)?? NO MEANS YES

One reason it can sometimes feel hard to say no is because of FOMO (fear of missing out).

We think that if we say "NO!" we're going to miss out on an opportunity.

?? Something important to realize: whenever we say "NO!" to one thing, it means we're likely saying "YES!" to something else later... even if we don't know what it is yet.

In this way, saying "NO!" is actually a way of saying "YES!".

? Saying "YES!" can limit our options just as much as saying "NO!".

3) ?? ONE-EYED, ONE-HORNED, FLYING PURPLE PEOPLE PLEASER: GO AWAY!

Disappointing people is a great muscle to build. ??

You want to make sure you're not spending your life going around people-pleasing all day long? Throw a few strong "NO!'s" in your day as a reminder that your life's purpose is not to make others happy.

? Not living up to others' expectations? Good.

?? The Bonus: every time you say "NO!", you get better at saying it. That doesn't mean you always have to say it. It means you'll have the ability to when you want to.

??Hope you have the chance to say "NO!" this week! Eric