A Nigerian Story

Rent and the Struggle for Equality

Have you tried renting an apartment recently? I am curious to know your experience with the rental housing market and where you are. Here is a story of my latest exploits trying to rent an apartment for my mother from private landlords via real-estate agents in Lagos, Nigeria. It has opened my eyes to the significant gender discrimination that exists in our housing market.

How it Started

“Not to worry, we will sort it. She has early stage Alzheimer's,” said the doctor over the phone. I listened to those words, perplexed how he could have come to those conclusions with the very insignificant data from a malaria blood test conducted on my mom. The only additional information was that my mum was incoherent and unable to recall his name, alongside frequent visits to the restroom. I told myself something was wrong and decided to follow my instincts. I have nothing against village doctors, but to give such a diagnosis required more investigation. To pronounce that on a patient with little testing and no reference to a specialist is questionable.?

My brother and I, over a phone conversation, made a call on the next move. He was at the hospital with my mum while I was on the phone calling from outside the country to keep tabs. We agreed to immediately move my mother from that hospital and head to the closest city. My husband quickly placed a call to his doctor-friend in Canada. We described her symptoms and told him her age; he suspected Urinary Tract Infection (UTI) and asked us to commence some over-the-counter medications.?

Once she got to Owerri, the closest city, we decided to transport my mother, all the way to Lagos. That would be an 8-hour trip; however, Lagos was one of - if not - the most urban city in Nigeria. We wanted to give her the best medical attention possible, no more taking chances.

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“Until the philosophy which holds one gender (sic) superior and another inferior is finally, and permanently discredited and abandoned- Everywhere is war.”

-Bob Marley (Musician and Activist)

My mother came back to Lagos, and I started a search for an apartment for her. I decided to ignore her wishes to relocate her to the village for good. It was clear that proper medical attention for her age (mid-seventies) was a challenge from the rural village in Nigeria. At her age, I believe proper medical attention was a priority. After losing my dad, my mother had spent the last decade living with my sister and her kids outside Africa. So, by the time she came back to Nigeria, she had lost her rented apartment. She concluded it made sense for her to move to the village.?

The beautiful hilly view cushioned with greens in my village is a sight to behold; the meandering clean spring water that runs through some of these hills is sweet to drink. Waking up to the early crow of the chickens, beautiful rising sun, clean air filled with the smell of fresh vegetation could inspire anyone, alongside the friendly greetings of villagers as they headed to the farm or market. It gives you that sense of belonging, recognizing you are not alone; however, I thought my mother needed more to live there permanently.

?I knew my mother would struggle to live in the village, having spent most of her adult life living in Lagos—an urban city. She was very active in her community in Lagos with a daily itinerary that is grueling to keep up with. My mother knows very well how to keep herself active and engaged; she has a restlessness that makes us hardly see her still at home.

My Experience: Stress and Gender Challenges

When we decided to get her an apartment, we wanted to choose a location based on her most recent residence in Lagos—somewhere close to her community, friends, church and support system. Herein started my nightmare of trying to rent an apartment for my mother in Lagos. Using an agent—a good friend of mine—I got tons of possible options. Then, via video calls and pictures, I viewed several interesting options that suited our criteria.?

The first shock came when the agent’s suggested I register my brother or my husband as the person renting the apartment for my mother. I thought that it was strange, especially since I was the one footing the bills. After several rejections to our offer, I decided to heed my agents' recommendations, allowing my husband to lead the discussions. What is wrong with having a woman foot the bills for her aged mother’s apartment? What has gender got to do with affording rent? If I, a female career executive, could not be seen as qualified to rent an apartment, then what can we say for a young lady that just got her first job and is trying to do good by her aged parents or even one that just got a job in a state that her family does not reside in?

Lacking evidence-based research illustrating if any groups in our society face more discrimination than others, I decided to explore other assumptions I suspected contributed to this frustration in renting an apartment. I wanted to explore the assumption that my lack of physical presence was probably the main issue.? The agents claimed they wanted to see the benefactor. In one instance, after engaging with the agent of this particular landlord severally, he recommended he speak with my husband, whom I have fully clarified was not the person renting the apartment. Still, the agent suggested we could close the deal with my husband. Fortunately, my husband was in Nigeria. He supported me by spending his weekends going on these apartment viewings and discussions with agents. Still, we were struggling to secure any of these apartments.

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Information Requested & Filtering Based on Profession

In addition to the obstacle my gender was causing, landlords and agents would send me application forms that asked various intruding questions—from my religion, village, state, marital status and even contact details of numerous next of kin and guarantors. One landlord requested pay slips, bank statements with an accompanying letter of introduction from your place of employment as evidence of the ability to continue payment. On another occasion, I was told the landlord did not want someone from my tribe. In several cases, the agents would let me know they wanted “a career person”. Does it mean that someone not employed cannot rent an apartment or that entrepreneurs are considered high risk? Were they implying that retired individuals are not fit to live in an apartment? In all the above scenarios, the common thread was that the renting party was a woman. As I mulled over these, it was sad that even in this 21st century, obvious discrimination and inequality are still freely exhibited in Nigeria.?

Unfortunately, I am not the only one who has experienced this. On social media, I saw that a couple of people had spoken about it too, like Alex via this tweet and the story of Janet in this article by Bella Naija.

My mother named me 'NKECHINYERE', which loosely translates to “The gift of God” or “Accepting this gift from God”. It was a prayer of consolation from a woman who had given birth to three girls consecutively in a patriarchal culture where a woman's societal class is seen as less than men. I was her third daughter by birth, the second to survive. Her marriage suffered a rough patch for this with her in-laws, who were fully determined to seek another wife due to her inability to produce a male heir. Being in dire straits and married to my father, who was the only son of his mother, my mother understood that in this case, the third time was no charm!? She faced severe pressures from her in-laws until she was apparently able to give them a male child.

Yes, I am from the Igbo ethnic group in Nigeria. Until April 14, 2014, when the Nigerian Supreme Court, in a unanimous decision, confirmed decisions of two lower courts, which had found unconstitutional an Igbo customary law of succession excluding female offspring from eligibility to inherit the property of their fathers. (Lemmy Ughegbe), Igbo women were ineligible to inherit properties. The culture groomed women to be married off, in some cases, to foster strong alliances and family ties.

?That was over forty years ago. But in so many ways, I felt it were today as I faced the challenges of leasing an apartment for my mom when landlords in Lagos have decided that a certain gender cannot sustain their rent. In many ways - through this way and more, the society is strongly inferring that wealth and status can only be in the custody of one gender. And then, I ask, "What is the difference between our society two decades ago and our society of today?" In so many ways, we have decided to remain the same as a society.

“Until there is no first class and second class citizens of any nations; until the gender (sic) of a person is no more significant than the colour of his or her eyes; until the basic human rights are equally guaranteed to all irrespective of gender (sic), Everywhere is war.”

- ? Bob Marley ( Musician and Activist)

It has been a couple of months since I commenced the search for an apartment for my mother. I still have not secured an apartment yet for my mother. In most cases, I have called out the bias, and walked away from the ridiculous demands. In many ways, I can afford to do this; not many women have the luxury of time and access to funds that gives me options. I have realized in the process how broken the housing system is in Lagos. We need to do more than speak up. My belief is that the solution should include regulatory or policy intervention to create impact at scale. The prejudice against women or other groups when it comes to renting a place needs to be addressed by the authorities. The world is progressing, the earning capacity of women or singles increasing, yet our society still withholds certain opportunities from groups based on their sex, marital status or tribe.?

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Jane Egerton-Idehen?is a bestselling?author,?an accomplished senior?Fortune 500 technology Executive, strategic advisor, spokesperson, and director of non-profit organizations. An engineer by training, she is an expert in the?Telecommunication industry, seamlessly bridging the divide between engineering, technology, and the end consumer.

Jane has a strong passion for promoting girls in STEM and ensuring women in STEM industries remain and grow their careers in that industry. She curates her thoughts around her career journey, experiences, and passion in life. Join our conversation on our Facebook page?@WomenNCareer?and Check out video blog?Women and Career?on YouTube.