Nick spent 10 years in jail. Got paroled and then started using again. But Jennifer still didn’t see him as a lost cause.

Jennifer is an addiction counselor at CGE’s Roots to Recovery outpatient program. She’s also a CGE Permanent Supportive Housing client, on her own path to recovery now for 10 years.??

“Everyone has a backstory as to why they started using substances or what made them relapse. Mine started when my mother became addicted to drugs and alcohol. Instead of that special mother-daughter bond with her, all I felt was resentment. I had my first drink at the age of 11. In my mid-twenties I was addicted to opiate pain pills. And in the last four months of my using, I became a 31-year-old single mother addicted to heroin and crack cocaine.”?

Having lived the life of an addict is something that helps Jennifer connect with her clients and provide insight and support. Recently, she sat down with Nick, one of her clients at Roots, and asked him to share his story of recovery.???

“Nick was incarcerated for 10 years. When he got out, he started using cocaine again. His parole officer recommended he come to Roots for Recovery. Curious as to why Nick started using again after being drug-free for 10 years and getting paroled, I asked him what was going on in his life back then.”??

“I had a lot going on. My mom was sick, she’s still sick. My dad’s not doing well. Just a lot of emotions. A lot of feelings,” Nick explained. “The only way I knew how to hide them was getting high. My relapse was my emotions. You know, just getting high and not dealing with my emotions in my everyday life.”?

Nick went on to say what his life has been like since he came to Roots to Recovery.??

“This is like a blessing to me,” he shared. “You and all the other counselors really care for the people who come here and genuinely want to help. That's what makes this place so special compared to other places. You don’t look at clients as addicts first. Here, you’re a person first and they want to help you address your problems.”??

According to Nick, in addition to the support, it’s also the feedback he’s received and learning how to communicate better that has helped him through his recovery.??

Jennifer notes, “Being able to communicate and ask for help was something that wasn’t easy for Nick when he first came here. Over time, he learned the importance of communicating and how asking for help could save his life.”?

Nick agrees, “Holding things in. That’s how I’ve always been. I hold it in. Hold it in. And then something bad happens. After listening to Jennifer’s suggestions, and attending group therapy sessions, I learned to interact with people instead of holding everything in. CGE provided me with the tools I needed to be able to cope with my emotions, so I don’t have to turn to drugs. Being able to let them out. It’s great.”?

Jennifer then made observations about Nick and CGE’s continuum of care: “He’s taken all of my suggestions. He has not let one go by the wayside. Not that I know everything, but his willingness to do something different is something I’ve seen in Nick since day one.?

At CGE, we tend to talk more about how we help pregnant and parenting women recover. So, I wanted to learn how our outpatient program helped Nick and if he had any advice for other men who need help with addiction.”?

“What you learn in here, the tricks or ideas for staying clean and being in recovery you can use in everyday life.” Nick begins, “I think the biggest perception with men is that you’re not allowed to show any emotion. You have to be tough. You can’t cry. That’s the furthest from the truth. It doesn’t make you less of a man because you cry. It doesn’t make you less of a man if you ask for help. It doesn’t make you less of a man if you admit that you have weaknesses or have things you need to work on."

I’m a completely different person today than I was 13 years ago. I have a good job, my support group, I attend my meetings—everything is going well. The future looks great for me.”?

One of the most admirable things Nick has done since he’s been in recovery is repaying all his debts.?

“I made a promise to myself when I was locked up that I would repay every dime to everybody that I ever stole or borrowed from down to the last penny.” Nick continues, “It wasn’t their fault that I did some BS. It wasn’t right what I did to them, and for me, part of my recovery was to at least make amends.”??

Nick has already paid back $21,000. Another $2,700 and he’ll be done.?

As for Jennifer, her story has come full circle. She continues to be a shining example for everyone who walks through our doors. Once they hear her story and how she turned her life around, they know it’s possible for them to do the same. And she’s here to help them every step of the way.??