A New Way of Writing Your Goals

Make Your Goals Easier to Achieve by Working with Your Subconscious Mind Rather than Against it

How can the way you write your goals make them easier to achieve?

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The key lies in our subconscious mind.

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The Subconscious Mind

What is the subconscious mind?

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It is the part of our minds that lies beneath our conscious mind. It is not accessible by our conscious mind yet controls 95% of the actions that we do or don’t take.

It is focused on preserving our most basic survival needs (physical safety & security, predictability & control, love & belonging). It’s our subconscious mind’s job to make sure these needs are meat at all costs, and it uses our past to tell it how to do this.

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Note.

Join me in future post as I dive into:

1. Where our subconscious programs and imprints came from
2. How to identify and become aware of them
3. How to rewrite and reprogram them

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This is why we find ourselves in these endless loops of self-sabotage, on-and-off the wagon, attracting the same relationships, continually loosing, and regaining the same 20 pounds, and repeating the life we are desperately trying to change.

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When they say it’s not your fault, it really isn’t. Yes, we took the actions that produced the results we now are experiencing, but the thing is we didn’t know – so can you give yourself grace for that?

Simply put we didn’t know what was really driving our actions and because of that we were trying to change the wrong things.

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I want to help make it easier for you to achieve your goals because I was there.

In this article, I will teach you how to write your goals in our brain’s language.

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How Our Subconscious Mind Works

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“Our Subconscious Minds Are Like A Five-Year-Old Child”

. . . although a five-year-old might be smarter.

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There are four keys to keep in mind about how our subconscious mind works: ?

1. Views the world like a five-year-old-child does – literally, emotionally driven, reactive, mimics their environment, lives in the present, and doesn’t grasp the concept of the past or the future.
2. Main job is to meet our basic needs and bases its decisions on how to do that based on the past. Safety to the brain means predictability and anything that the brain has not experienced before, and thus cannot predict, is viewed as a threat. ??
3. The brain must explicitly be told what to do because, like Amelia Bedelia – everything is literal, it cannot interpret what it really means.
4. Does not distinguish between the physical and mental reality. What it believes mentally, it will create physically. ?

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Why does this matter?

If I am going to be frank, it doesn’t really matter. It just makes achieving your goals easier by working with your brain rather than against it.

It stops that continual and repetitive cycle of trying to achieve the same goal over and over again.

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Summary of The Subconscious Brain

Remember:

1. Our brain is a five-year-old child
2. 95% of the actions we do or do not take are driven by our subconscious beliefs and imprints
3. Our subconscious mind does not distinguish between our physical and mental reality
4. Our brain’s job is to meet our basic needs and using the past to tell it how to do it
5. Our brains need to explicitly be told what to do, it cannot infer

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The Subconscious Brain and Goal Achievement

Achieving a goal, we’ve never achieved before requires changing our current subconscious identity, beliefs, and truth(s).

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But here’s the problem, and the reason why we find ourselves self-sabotaging, falling off the wagon, and ultimately unable to sustain our goals – our subconscious’s job is to meet our basic needs and it bases how to meet these needs based on our past experiences not our future wants.

Here’s the interesting part – even if our current reality is something we’d don’t want, we don’t like, and may be painful to live, our subconscious feels safe because it is familiar. When there is familiarity there is predictability – this predictability creates a sense of control and knowing and to our subconscious, this means safety.

When we start changing our actions or even our environment, there is not more predictability that our subconscious brains relies on to feel safe and secure. It’s when this happens that our subconscious puts on the brakes and begins pulling us back into “safety” – back into our old patterns and behaviors – so that our basic needs are met (in the only way our subconscious mind knows how).

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This is what has kept us safe throughout history. Our brains are simply trying to help us, but like children, their help can sometimes make it a bit harder on you.

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So then, the question becomes – if the body follows the mind, then how do we change the subconscious mind that is driving our body, if, we can’t consciously access it?

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How Do We Change Our Subconscious Beliefs?

Quick Note. To understand the full process, read my post “The Unlocking Life Framework.” This framework will teach you all the steps to become aware of, rewrite, and reprogram your subconscious beliefs.

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The first step to changing our subconscious beliefs is to become aware of our subconscious beliefs.

The question is how?

We start taking action that is in alignment with the person that we want to become.

That is we start “being” that person before we are that person. ?

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To change our external, we must start with the internal.

That is, we must be the person internally before we are the person externally.

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What does this really mean?

The problem is that we are taught to take action rather than becoming the person.

But remember:

1. Our subconscious beliefs control 95% of the actions that we do or do not take
2. Our subconscious’s job is to meet our basic needs and it uses the past to predict the future

When we take action that goes against those beliefs, our subconscious believes that our basic needs are being threatened and starts to put on the brakes.

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Let me clarify – this idea of being the person before we are that person.

The key is to embody the thoughts and feelings of the person we want to be. It is from those thoughts and feelings that our actions come from because every action that we do or do not take, we take to make us feel or not feel a certain way.

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Stay with me as we dive a bit deeper and go beyond affirmations and positive self-talk. ?

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Becoming the Person Before You’re the Person

The person that we are today and the things that we have today are a result of the actions that we took before we were that person that had those things.

The actions and beliefs precede the having.

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It is the “Be, Do, Have” Model.

The person you are (the “be”) determines the actions you do or don’t take (the “do”) that then creates your results (the “have”).

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Think about an inventor. Everything they invented started with:

1. An idea
2. The belief that, that idea is a reality ?

Our most prized inventions came from those people that no one else believed in. They were the only ones that had belief in their idea.

Everything from electricity and the light bulb; to cars, automobiles, and planes; our phones and computers that, now, we couldn’t imagine living without – was once before called crazy.

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Ponder this . . .

“All our possibilities are a result of what we are and are not willing to believe.”

An interesting question to ask yourself is: How are my beliefs limiting me?

And . . . What if I didn’t believe “x” . . . then what might be possible for me?

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Your Action: Becoming The Person

So how do you start becoming this person? Or rather embodying this person?

First, a big note.

Becoming the person we want is not about affirmations or positive self-talk because:

1. Affirmations – if we don’t believe them or believe they could be true, then we reinforce the belief that what we want is not possible, moving us further away from what we want. The key is to use bridge thoughts that continually move us towards that thought.
2. Positive Self Talk – invalidates our emotions. By labeling our emotion as good or bad we fail to hear the messages that each has for us. The more that we try to get rid of an emotion the more intense and frequently it shows up because it is trying to tell us something. It’s not until we listen to it’s message will it then move through us. ?

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The Key to Becoming the Person We Want to Be

The key is to get clear on, what does this person values. What does the person, that we want to become truly value in their life? ?

Because our values tell us “how” to act. It doesn’t matter what we want but rather how we get it and sustain it that matters.

Our values give us direction by telling us what path to take to get to where we want to go. There is more than one way to achieve a goal. The key is to achieve your goals in a way that is in alignment with who you are. ?

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Finding Your Values

Step ONE: Answer

1. Who does this person value? Look up to? Who do they not?
2. How does this person want to show up? What is their character?
3. How does this person approach (fill in situation)?
4. How does this person treat themselves? Treat others?
5. What does this person do? . . . and more importantly not do?
6. Who does this person surround themselves with (people, places, things)? . . . and not? 6 What is this person consuming (media, education, nutrition, movement, relationships)? . . . and not?
7. What is this person doing on a daily basis? . . . and not?

Step TWO: Note the Recurring Patterns

Step THREE: Write Down the Top 3-5 Values

Step FOUR: Answer “Why” that Person Values Those Values ?

Further define each value by asking what does that value mean? How would you explain that value?

Step FIVE: Start Living in These Values.

Starting living in these values by making your decisions from them.

The Key Question to Ask: “is this in alignment with my values?”

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A Word of Caution

When you begin taking action, you are going to start to feel resistance from your subconscious mind as it tries to pull you back into what it believes will meet your basic needs. ?

The key is not to fight or resist this, but to get curious about why it’s there, and then move with it and continue to reteach it that these new actions are safe.

For more in depth articles on how to reprogram your subconscious mind subscribe and follow me.

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Quick Review

We are who we are and have what we have because we were that person internally before we were that person externally.

This means if we want to change ourselves or change our life, we must start by changing our internal sate of being first.

Now let’s look at how to write goals that help us become the person before we are that person.

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How to Write Goals that Make Achieving them Easier

Reminder

When we write our goals, the goal is to be – in the present moment – the person that is already creating the life that we want to live, not just a goal we want. ??

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The Three Step Process that Makes Goals Easier to Achieve

1. Write What you DO Want, Not What you Don’t Want
2. Write in The Present Tense, as it is happening right now
3. Write it as the Action you are currently taking

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Step ONE: Write What You DO Want, Not What You Don’t Want

Where the mind goes, the body follows.

The mind is literal and cannot read between the lines – remember, it’s Amelia Bedelia.

It does not understand negative words such as “don’t,” “not,” or “stop” because these words require the brain to read between the lines and infer what we are implying, but the brain, like a five-year-old, only hears the object and the action. ?

So, “don’t touch the stove” . . . become “touch the stove.” Or for us “I want to lose weight” becomes “I want to weight.”

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Step TWO: Write in The Present Tense ?

The key is to be before we are.

To change our external state, we must become the person that is currently creating the body, thinking the thoughts, and living the life that naturally supports the goals that we want to achieve. ??

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Examples:

I am going to start exercising à I go to the gym 5 times a week ??

I am want to start eating healthy à I am eating healthy ?

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Step THREE: Write it as The Action you Are Taking

To be the person that is creating the life we want, we must create it. That requires taking action.

When our goals are made as statements, the brain will focus on the outcome rather than the process needed to create the outcome. Without action, the brain will not know what to do to get that thing.

Remember:

We are a five-year-old that needs explicit direction.

When we add an action statement to our goals, we transform that goal into an action that the mind will be focusing on, creating a natural pull to start doing that action.

All actions typically have an -ing attached to them.

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Putting It Together

Examples: “How to Write Your Goals” ?

ORIGINAL: “I want to stop smoking” . . . the brain hears “I want to smoking” because it does not understand the word stop – the question the brain asks, is what do I do? And it looks at the literal words in the sentence to tell it what to do. So, we must tell it what we want it to do rather than what we don’t want it to do. ?? REWRITE: “I am living a life that will allow me to play with my grandchildren by taking care of my health”

Break it down:

1 What you do want is to be able to play with your grandchildren 2 “Am” and “-ing” both indicate that you are the person now 3 “Taking care of my health” is the action step you are taking

Notice how there is no mention of the word smoking in that goal. Goals aren’t meant to get rid of an action but rather establish new ones that naturally crowd out and replace the old.

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ORIGINAL: “I want to lose weight” . . . the brain hears this as “I want to weight” . . . or rather it does not know what to focus on other than weight, so it’s default will to continue to take the same actions you are right now. ? REWRITE: “I am to travel with ease and comfort now that I am working out with a personal trainer 3x a week”

Break it down:

1. What you want is to be able to fit in the airplane seats without discomfort
2. “Am” and “-ing” both indicate you are the person now
3. “Working with a personal trainer 3x a week” is the direct action you are taking

Note that being very specific does not leave anything for your brain to question. This is powerful in those moments when we are mentally, emotionally, and/or physically exhausted and when we don’t have it in us to make a conscious decision. These are the moments where we default to our subconscious programs. So when you are establishing a new habit – make the decision a head of time of what you will do in those situations.

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Pro Tip:

Put your goals on autopilot by:

1. Making them stupidly simple to do – remove all barriers to achieving them and start with the most basic step. Example: make the shopping list and have someone else buy it for you.
2. Anchoring them into your routine so they naturally become habits. Example, put you supplements by your toothbrush.
3. Make them fun to do by pairing them with something you enjoy. Example: like podcasts – pair that with cleaning.

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YOUR ACTION

“Knowledge is only as powerful as the actions taken with that knowledge”

Now let’s put that knowledge to work and rewrite your goals to move you in the direction you want them to take you.

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Use this chart below to write and rewrite your goals so they are for, rather than against you.

Want to learn more about your subconscious mind and how to work with it rather than against it?

Follow me as I continue to put out more working articles to help you create the life you want to live.

Best – Emily